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Wife has become a prostitute and has disengaged.

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My wife and I have been together for almost 7 years. We met on the streets in the middle of our drug addiction. When we became pregnant, a Christian family took us in, allowing us to get clean. We later had a daughter. This motivated me to want to provide for my family, giving them what I never had. I worked, went to school, and did very well considering my background. She did great as well, becoming a very good mother.
However, some Satanists worked their way into my wife's heart. While I was off working, they were using demonic influence to get close to her and our kids. Despite my warnings to her that people might attempt to get close to her because of our beautiful kids, she began sneaking off and using drugs with men and women I never got to meet . We eventually found out that these men were part of a child sex trafficking ring.
At any rate, she betrayed me and left with the kids, placing them in all sorts of danger. Because I was exposing these people, contracts (Dont ask me who funds these) were made available to have me committed as crazy. I was never committed, but an order was made restraining me from seeing her. She took off with the car, sold my computer which had my life's work, and left me roaming the streets homeless for months.
Eventually it was found out that she was using drugs while having custody of the kids. They were taken and adopted out.
One night we came back together. I was reluctant to join myself with her because of her infidelity, but eventually I did.
She continued cheating on me, denying it, though I had very heart breaking recordings of her with other men. Even after crying and providing the proof, she denied it, saying it was all in my head. She had and continues to have no remorse for her actions.
Recently she came clean that she is now selling her body to support our housing and drug addiction.
Now she has become even colder. Our intimacy is shot because she only likes to do things when others are in ear shot. She is quite loud about it, making sure our guests hear. This makes it difficult for me to trust her motives while making love.
I have heard her talking to another Satanic man, bragging about the pain and hurt she is causing me. She also tells this man that she can't wait to get away from me so she can be with him. Besides this she has also engaged in homosexual activity and when questioned about it, gives me this hateful, scoffing smile. When I cry, she calls me a whiner. When I confront her she snaps, telling me she dont want to hear it. She has made me out to be an animal to all her friends.
I have remained faithful to her, though I myself had twice made out with someone for money because we needed to get into a room. I asked her first, and she agreed. Though I really didn't want to do it, I did it for us.
I have repented from my sins and have never joined myself with another woman. She, however, joins herself to John's, and has been with other men for the shear pleasure of it.
She has totally disengaged herself from me. Hardly will she allow me to cuddle like we used to. She is submissive to these Satanists and appears to join herself to demons, but will hardly submit to me.
She is still with me, but I am made to feel unwanted, worthless, and inferior to those she frequents with. Whenever I do do something honorable, she will give credit to the Satanists for all my hard work.
As crazy as it sounds, it's as if she is getting paid to discredit me and to keep me down, so that my testimony against these child trafficking molesters is made out to be meaningless.
I understand that these people are very manipulative and use drugs, black magic, and sex as a form of coercion. I also know that they blackmail and extort her as well. For a time I used this to justify her actions, making it easier to forgive her.
But now the pain, the apathy, the outright hatred and the thought of other men having her do terrible things to me has become too much to bare. The thought of other men doing to her what I thought was sacred between us hurts so deeply that I am often depressed and dejected, unable to do anything else other than pace the streets in tears.
She is still with me, however, though her motives for being with me seem to be a conspiracy. She claims she still loves me, but has lied to me about a lot of things. She has even led me to believe that her and this Satanist lover of her somehow have our kids hidden away, breaking my heart as a father. She has also led me to believe that she is no longer in love with me but is in love with this other man. I was also led to believe that this man was caught sexually molesting the kids, and that she had bailed him out of jail. When I would later question her about this, she would deny that she even hinted at such a thing. For whatever reason she seems to get a kick out of fooling me, as if by deception, she has somehow outdone me.
I have often found myself wanting to leave, but always find myself opening the Bible to Hosea, the prophet who was made to mary a prostitute. I fear for her eternal soul and remember how we used to be. I keep on picturing her as the sweet angel who overcame so much abuse as a child and who used to have the most contagious smile. Seeing her now, unhappy, devoid of feelings, and so spiritually dead breaks my heart. These people are only using her and care not for her, but she has somehow convinced herself that they do and that in the end their will be some great reward for her. They worship the father of lies, yet she believes them. The black magic being used has her in a complete stupor.
She has forsaken Christ to follow after his enemy, making it worse than if she had never given herself to Christ in the first place. She has become a Judas. I don't want that for her, and stay around, pray, and try to guide her back. She has taken this love as a weakness and despises me because of it. I sometimes think that leaving again might be necessary to prove to her that codependency is not my motive and that my love should not be take for granted. I have done this before, but her pride has made her forget. Besides my dedication to God, she takes a big chunk of my life and time.
What should I do? What would you do? Please pray for us.
 
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I also have turned to drugs to deal with the pain
This is definitely a wrong turn for help. Find a bible believing and preaching church, and seek again the intimacy of fellowship with God. Your example will win her heart if nothing else. I can surely pray for you in Jesus' name.
:wave2
 
This is definitely a wrong turn for help. Find a bible believing and preaching church, and seek again the intimacy of fellowship with God. Your example will win her heart if nothing else. I can surely pray for you in Jesus' name.
:wave2
I know my part is bad as well. It hurts so much though.
 
I know my part is bad as well. It hurts so much though.

hello Jeremy Leval, dirtfarmer here

The use of drugs to ease the hurt is never a solution to the problem. You mention your "dedication to God", God will not be joined with the world or share your "dedication to him" with the world. You have to first be his. If you have never received salvation, then that is the first step to you having a life.

God can and will remove the guilt that you seem to have. You may never be able to have a relations again with your "wife". God can remove the pain you feel, but the memory will always be there to remind you of where you were and how far you have come. David sinned against God and paid a price even though he was forgiven by God.
Always remember that God can turn disaster into blessings if we allow him to. The end might not be as we had planned or hoped for, but God is to be always glorified in every thing.
 
The main thing is to "come to your senses" and go down on your knees and repent towards God with total remorse.Just like the Lost Son did in
Luke 15 :11-31.I know its easier said than done, but you must allow the Holy Spirit to help you to take control of your situation,clearly there is no control in your married relationship .Of course this is exactly how Satan wants it.Patch up your end "come to your senses" on the drugs bit ,and get your butt into a Church, even if only by yourself for a start.The old Beatles tune "Get Back" is the way to go here.
 
I think you scan these stories to somehow judge people's lives. Not all people have it as easy as you, nor are they so blinded that they think the life they live is all their is. Edited
 
The main thing is to "come to your senses" and go down on your knees and repent towards God with total remorse.Just like the Lost Son did in
Luke 15 :11-31.I know its easier said than done, but you must allow the Holy Spirit to help you to take control of your situation,clearly there is no control in your married relationship .Of course this is exactly how Satan wants it.Patch up your end "come to your senses" on the drugs bit ,and get your butt into a Church, even if only by yourself for a start.The old Beatles tune "Get Back" is the way to go here.
Thank you for your heart felt advice.
 
So sorry to hear about your situation. It may have to run its course, not to say the Lord is not working.
The world is a school house, sometimes it takes a good dose of misery before we cry out to God. She is not happy, I would not be fooled by her acting she is. It may be that you do need to separate yourself from the situation for a time and if there is abuse of the children it should be reported.
 
Brother, I have been there and as much as it will hurt, it will not hurt that long and you need to ignore posts like the one Smaller made, separate, divorce, get clean and go to the LORD in repentance.
Call me an anti-fan of porn headers at christian discussion boards and overly truthful expose's of sins in front of congregations.
 
Call me an anti-fan of porn headers at christian discussion boards and overly truthful expose's of sins in front of congregations.
Many deny it but we all have sinned, some of us were just more devoted than others but to deny and to never relate to anothe3r in neede is aiti-Christ.
 
Many deny it but we all have sinned, some of us were just more devoted than others but to deny and to never relate to anothe3r in neede is aiti-Christ.
The opening poster should be asked to request help out of the public sight rather than demonstrate the trash and manipulation of sin in his and his wife's life.

Are we going to entertain blow by blow accounts of porn stars in sexual actions in their confessions of sins in public?

I hope believers are not that stupid. But this guy is pushing the envelope. Hopefully an adult in charge here can take over.

and fwiw, I've seen "unbelievers" have fun and games online with gullible believers to no end with "phony vivid stories." And I've also seen newbie believers describing their previous unsaved acts/actions where the pastor has to step in and stop it because it's inappropriate for public consumption.
 
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The opening poster should be asked to request help out of the public sight rather than demonstrate the trash and manipulation of sin in his and his wife's life.

Are we going to entertain blow by blow accounts of porn stars in sexual actions in their confessions of sins in public?

I hope believers are not that stupid. But this guy is pushing the envelope. Hopefully an adult in charge here can take over.

and fwiw, I've seen "unbelievers" have fun and games online with gullible believers to no end with "phony vivid stories." And I've also seen newbie believers describing their previous unsaved acts/actions where the pastor has to step in and stop it because it's inappropriate for public consumption.
I do not know that he is doing that, neither do you except he makes the wrong move and he hasn't.
 
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