Hi again Silmarien. Got another thought for ya. This one might help with the barriers or potiential barriers. Please be patient it might take a while to explain For much of my life I've closely watched my indivual faith. Possibly because I've had friends that don't believe in God, and opened me up to critisms of a Christian believer. Whether I intended to tell them or not of my observations and conclusions, or my thoughts on their criticisms, it had become a kind of mental collection of experiences confirming my faith in God to be real. Some time after this I developed my own theory of finding the truth. Or more accurately the hirarichary of authority for what is true and what isn't. I hope this isn't that dry, but here it goes. The lowest level of authority For finding what is true and what isn't (as well as what's right and what's not) is good reasoning and good rationelle. I say this is the lowest level of authority because the levels above it can correct it when and if it is wrong. That said mankind are pretty bright people. From detective work and crime scene investigations to engerning, math, and theoretical sciences, to ancient history of great thinkers, mathematicians, and innovators. Our ability to think and reason is a good first step of authority for what is and isn't true. That said there is a limitation to our understandings. We have too many ideas that can't all be correct. Some are even out right lies. Somethimes it's hard to tell what is good reasoning verses what is really well spoken and who is the best debater. Because of this the next best authority for what is true is experience. To tell what is true by what's happened and what is seen, as well as what ideas don't fit and need to be corrected. This is the level of authority you've said you'd be looking for. But I want to give you encouragement. You're not alone. Just like how we can learn from great thinkers, and those trained in any field to give us a better understanding and better reasoning skills, the experiences we have can be considered along side the experiences of people we trust. That aspect leads down a different rabbit hole of who can you trust and circumstances where you should be skeptical. But for now just want to emphize that your not alone. The third level of authority would have to be something you trust more then you trust your own senses and personal experiences. Since you're currently searching to hopefully find God, this might be a stretch, but in my opinion He and anything that comes from Him is the highest authority for what is right, and what is true. The major issue with this though is knowing what is from God and what isn't. For me the bible is one of the highest authorities, because I don't know if I can trust my own sence or my own reasoning to determine what's from God and what isn't. So the general rule is if if agrees with the scripture I know, then it's possible that it might be from God. If something goes directly against what I've read then there's enough reason question the source entirely as well as the logic and reasoning it holds. I'm sorry if that last bit is a stretch, because you can't easily use a trust in God to confirm that God exists. But if you do find Him, then you can call Him the higher authority that can correct us even when we don't have experiences to verify what He would tell us. Until then study the bible and keep the communication open through prayer. If nothing else be encouraged by statistics that give light by their experiences. If a large enough population say they have had miracles, answered prayers, or other religous experiences; then let that be an encouragement to the possibility of God being real. Unless a population has a reason to lie (like fame or money) give them the benifit of the doubt that they wouldn't all be lying nor would they all be crazy. With that logic to give a benifit of doubt the larger the population with experiences the more reliable the statistic of that kind of experience. For me, I use that kind of logic for possibilities outside of religion as well. Hope this helps the psychological maze and doesn't make it worse. Peace.