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Courtship??
- Thread starter Hanna
- Start date
Nick
Member
I have the feeling this may be an issue in your personal life? It would be interesting to know.
Anyway, I see nothing wrong with courtship, in fact it is definatley a good prelude for engagement. I see courtship as better and more Biblical than dating. I've always seen courtship as somethinlg more serious and with a longer-term understanding and intention than dating, although I dont' really have much against dating.
My parents have similar views, although I am yet to date or court a girl. It just hasn't happened yet, but I pray for a partner.
In terms of spending time alone with your partner (unmarrioed) I know many on this form, espcailly handy (sorry handy) that would not allow their kids to really be alone prior to perhaps 17 or 18 for fear of sexual temptation.
I would hope that in Christian circles by the age of 16 or 17 (max) the two people in the relationship would have enough maturity and hojpefully trust from their parents to be able to date ie have idnner, movies etc alone. I am a big believer in the privacy of the individual and a cuuple, particularly when it comes to these types of things. A couple can only really get to know each other, and know if they are suitible to get married (which should generally be the purpose of courtship) if they can spend time togther - and only together.
Now don't get me wrong, I first-handed know the realities of sexual temptation. Tod deal with this bit, I believe in the fellowship and teachings of the parents and church rather than direct supervision by parents.
Anyway, I see nothing wrong with courtship, in fact it is definatley a good prelude for engagement. I see courtship as better and more Biblical than dating. I've always seen courtship as somethinlg more serious and with a longer-term understanding and intention than dating, although I dont' really have much against dating.
My parents have similar views, although I am yet to date or court a girl. It just hasn't happened yet, but I pray for a partner.
In terms of spending time alone with your partner (unmarrioed) I know many on this form, espcailly handy (sorry handy) that would not allow their kids to really be alone prior to perhaps 17 or 18 for fear of sexual temptation.
I would hope that in Christian circles by the age of 16 or 17 (max) the two people in the relationship would have enough maturity and hojpefully trust from their parents to be able to date ie have idnner, movies etc alone. I am a big believer in the privacy of the individual and a cuuple, particularly when it comes to these types of things. A couple can only really get to know each other, and know if they are suitible to get married (which should generally be the purpose of courtship) if they can spend time togther - and only together.
Now don't get me wrong, I first-handed know the realities of sexual temptation. Tod deal with this bit, I believe in the fellowship and teachings of the parents and church rather than direct supervision by parents.
Jesusfreak97
Member
Hi Hanna! 
Well this is kinda sad but I don't really know the difference between dating and courting. The first time I heard that word was in an old timey movie so I don't know if I'm just out of it or maybe it's my blondness.
I dunno...
Anyway I can't really answer your first few questions but I can answer about the dating. Well I don't think dating is wrong if you do it for the right reasons.
I also think it's fine for someone to be alone with their boyfriend/girlfriend as long as their parents ok it and both of them have set boundaries and are going to stay within those boundaries.
I hope that helped a little...hehe oh btw welcome to the forum!
and if anyone could explain to me what courtship is I would love that.
Well this is kinda sad but I don't really know the difference between dating and courting. The first time I heard that word was in an old timey movie so I don't know if I'm just out of it or maybe it's my blondness.
I dunno...Anyway I can't really answer your first few questions but I can answer about the dating. Well I don't think dating is wrong if you do it for the right reasons.
I also think it's fine for someone to be alone with their boyfriend/girlfriend as long as their parents ok it and both of them have set boundaries and are going to stay within those boundaries.
I hope that helped a little...hehe oh btw welcome to the forum!
and if anyone could explain to me what courtship is I would love that.Thanks for the welcome.
Yes Its a topic near to me right now
...some of these icons make me laugh but they sure help explain how you feel. LOL
I just turned 15 at the end of Feb...my bf is 19 and in Bible college...we are commited to God and we want to stay pure.
My parents are very storng believers in Courtship and they are almost closed to any discussion. I have tried to make them see that I am trustworthy as my bf has as well. It has made us both frustrated!!
I guess a simple description of it is you are not allowed to be alone together and well I guess there is alot more to it...here is a link if it helps...
http://www.reformedonline.com/view/reformedonline/famdate.htm
I understand about all the things it is saying and how its supposed to be better and safer...Im not even supposed to call him my bf becasue I am too young to get married....not supposed to date at all since you are not of marrying age.
It has caused lots of tension lately...particularly over last week when he was home on reading week...when we snuck off togther for an afternoon. My dad was super super upset.
I guess i want to respect them but its so hard...just wanted to see what others thought.
:help
Yes Its a topic near to me right now
...some of these icons make me laugh but they sure help explain how you feel. LOLI just turned 15 at the end of Feb...my bf is 19 and in Bible college...we are commited to God and we want to stay pure.
My parents are very storng believers in Courtship and they are almost closed to any discussion. I have tried to make them see that I am trustworthy as my bf has as well. It has made us both frustrated!!
I guess a simple description of it is you are not allowed to be alone together and well I guess there is alot more to it...here is a link if it helps...
http://www.reformedonline.com/view/reformedonline/famdate.htm
I understand about all the things it is saying and how its supposed to be better and safer...Im not even supposed to call him my bf becasue I am too young to get married....not supposed to date at all since you are not of marrying age.
It has caused lots of tension lately...particularly over last week when he was home on reading week...when we snuck off togther for an afternoon. My dad was super super upset.
I guess i want to respect them but its so hard...just wanted to see what others thought.
:help
Nick
Member
Take a look here http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/CourtshipHi Hanna!
Well this is kinda sad but I don't really know the difference between dating and courting. The first time I heard that word was in an old timey movie so I don't know if I'm just out of it or maybe it's my blondness.
Anyway I can't really answer your first few questions but I can answer about the dating. Well I don't think dating is wrong if you do it for the right reasons.
I also think it's fine for someone to be alone with their boyfriend/girlfriend as long as their parents ok it and both of them have set boundaries and are going to stay within those boundaries.
I hope that helped a little...hehe oh btw welcome to the forum!
Jesusfreak97
Member
Hanna,
I clicked on the link (thank you btw) and I didn't read all of it because it was waaay too long but I think I get the basic gist. Is that what your parents want?
Nick,
Thank you! I'm not sure what I think about courtship but ok! (hanna's link kinda threw me off (sorry hanna)) But I'm gonna stick to what I'm doing right now about my romatic life: nothing cuz I'm single and I like it that way!
I clicked on the link (thank you btw) and I didn't read all of it because it was waaay too long but I think I get the basic gist. Is that what your parents want?
Nick,
Thank you! I'm not sure what I think about courtship but ok! (hanna's link kinda threw me off (sorry hanna)) But I'm gonna stick to what I'm doing right now about my romatic life: nothing cuz I'm single and I like it that way!
Jesusfreak97
Member
ok GOOD! cuz that scared me a lil...
ed! lol
ed! lol
Nick
Member
Hmmm....Thanks for the welcome.
Yes Its a topic near to me right now
I just turned 15 at the end of Feb...my bf is 19 and in Bible college...we are commited to God and we want to stay pure.
My parents are very storng believers in Courtship and they are almost closed to any discussion. I have tried to make them see that I am trustworthy as my bf has as well. It has made us both frustrated!!
I guess a simple description of it is you are not allowed to be alone together and well I guess there is alot more to it...here is a link if it helps...
http://www.reformedonline.com/view/reformedonline/famdate.htm
I understand about all the things it is saying and how its supposed to be better and safer...Im not even supposed to call him my bf becasue I am too young to get married....not supposed to date at all since you are not of marrying age.
It has caused lots of tension lately...particularly over last week when he was home on reading week...when we snuck off togther for an afternoon. My dad was super super upset.
I guess i want to respect them but its so hard...just wanted to see what others thought.
:help
Given that you're under the age of consent and your boyfriend is legally an adult, this could be problematic. It could cause a lot of tensions between you two and your families. Obviously it already is. Perhaps it's better to wait a few years, and respect your parents' wishes on this. I guess if you two really love each other then waiting shouldn't be too much of a problem. Above all, trust in God.
Considering he is away at school MOST of the year...I guess its not an issue...only seems to hit the fan when he comes home. I understand about what your saying...but it takes time and time spent together to maintain a relationship. Its ok to talk on MSN and Skype when he is away but when he comes home...face to face communication is much better. Mannn... name one good thing about being 15 these days...sigh