Christ_empowered
Member
...by my psychiatric history. I'm considered a "trouble maker." Doctors went out of their way to make my life a living hell. I can't complain too much; God has been good to me, especially since I came to believe upon Christ (miracle!) a bit over 4 years ago.
I've dealt with the criminal system and I've dealt with the mental health system. Honestly, I had an easier go of things in the legal system than with psychiatrists. Especially if you can get a lawyer, the legal system...has rules. Psychiatric hospitals? naw, not so much. They say : "You're narcissistic!," that's the end of things for you. You speak, they do not listen. You (truthfully) say "xyz," they say "You're a pathological liar! its abc!"
I --am-- blessed all over. My parents are now somewhat affluent, so that provides a "buffer" between the community ("mental health professionals" included) and me. Not many people get that layer of protection.
More importantly, The Lord has willed that I be a part of the family again, for the 1st time in over 10 years. That's --huge--.
Its just...how am I ever going to get a job if these shrinks come after me? If people in general--and a lot of people around here seem to know an awful lot about my psych history--come after me? I do not have a felony. I may be eligible to expunge/seal my misdemeanor. That's --huge--, and for most people, that's really all you need to move forward. But...
...its me, the "uppity mental patient." I wouldn't say I'm "scared," per se, but I will say that The Lord has moved mightily in my life, but there's still some questions in my mind about how far I can go with enemies like these.
Right now, my official label/diagnosis is "Bipolar I." I can't complain too much; I now get disability, which is a huge blessing, since there's no way I can get an OK job around here, not after the psychiatrists "made an example" out of me (no, really. long story...).
But, my community has voted me 'schizophrenic,' which is supposed to = a life of abject poverty under control of "experts." The Lord has spared me all that, which is amazing, but I need to figure out a way to move forward despite these horrible labels and such from the past, and I don't know if I can. As much as I'd like to believe that the people currently treating me are somehow different from the ones back in the day, I often suspect my parents' status and the lawyer made a big difference (long story...). "Nothing personal; just the way the world works." Riiight.
Ugh. I'm rambling. Its just...I want to do something productive, constructive, but I sometimes think I'm going to have to "think outside the box" if I want to earn enough of my own $$$ to get off disability and out of the role of "mental patient."
Please pray.
I've dealt with the criminal system and I've dealt with the mental health system. Honestly, I had an easier go of things in the legal system than with psychiatrists. Especially if you can get a lawyer, the legal system...has rules. Psychiatric hospitals? naw, not so much. They say : "You're narcissistic!," that's the end of things for you. You speak, they do not listen. You (truthfully) say "xyz," they say "You're a pathological liar! its abc!"
I --am-- blessed all over. My parents are now somewhat affluent, so that provides a "buffer" between the community ("mental health professionals" included) and me. Not many people get that layer of protection.
More importantly, The Lord has willed that I be a part of the family again, for the 1st time in over 10 years. That's --huge--.
Its just...how am I ever going to get a job if these shrinks come after me? If people in general--and a lot of people around here seem to know an awful lot about my psych history--come after me? I do not have a felony. I may be eligible to expunge/seal my misdemeanor. That's --huge--, and for most people, that's really all you need to move forward. But...
...its me, the "uppity mental patient." I wouldn't say I'm "scared," per se, but I will say that The Lord has moved mightily in my life, but there's still some questions in my mind about how far I can go with enemies like these.
Right now, my official label/diagnosis is "Bipolar I." I can't complain too much; I now get disability, which is a huge blessing, since there's no way I can get an OK job around here, not after the psychiatrists "made an example" out of me (no, really. long story...).
But, my community has voted me 'schizophrenic,' which is supposed to = a life of abject poverty under control of "experts." The Lord has spared me all that, which is amazing, but I need to figure out a way to move forward despite these horrible labels and such from the past, and I don't know if I can. As much as I'd like to believe that the people currently treating me are somehow different from the ones back in the day, I often suspect my parents' status and the lawyer made a big difference (long story...). "Nothing personal; just the way the world works." Riiight.
Ugh. I'm rambling. Its just...I want to do something productive, constructive, but I sometimes think I'm going to have to "think outside the box" if I want to earn enough of my own $$$ to get off disability and out of the role of "mental patient."
Please pray.
