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I quit church

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My wife and I quit church.
After over 32 years of faithful going to church, and my wife her entire life, we have quit for what seems for good.
Our current church, no need to knock denominations, just made a new rule; be a member or you can't participate in any ministries.
So my wife, faithful to the women's prayer group every Tuesday morning, was told by the group leader she could no longer attend.
We will not become members and be forced to follow man made rules.

So I looked in the internet at all the churches in our area that we have yet to try, and we determined they are all the same.
They want membership, they want you to follow the rules, they want to control you in some way.

And we don't buy it.
So we watched Charles Stanley for an hour today and will make a church service at home from now on.

There are alot of good churchs around, many folks as you say have turned to home meetings in their area.
It is just the way it is, easy to say thus and thus about any particular denomination or group meeting so I wont. See what suits you, either finding a church or just doing what you're doing for now. After years of attendance its hard to just walk away and do nothing. I would say you are not alone and also in a good place to be led of the Spirit into something else.
 
There are alot of good churchs around, many folks as you say have turned to home meetings in their area.
It is just the way it is, easy to say thus and thus about any particular denomination or group meeting so I wont. See what suits you, either finding a church or just doing what you're doing for now. After years of attendance its hard to just walk away and do nothing. I would say you are not alone and also in a good place to be led of the Spirit into something else.
Very insightful...
 
Thank you for your reply.
We have tried a couple of times these past few years.
People our age don't want to go out.
The neighbors are all pagans and they avoid us.
My wife and I have suffered illness quite a bit these last 7 years.
After all the years of service in the church, we thought maybe someone would rise up and provide that service for us, but it's not going to happen.
We're both tired.
My wife is 79 years old.
2 broken knee caps and osteoporosis.
she can't climb a flight of stairs anymore.
it's time for a change of the guard.

O Allen. I'm so very sorry about your Wife's poor physical situation. I would like to add you and your Wife to my morning prayer list, if that's Ok with you. Perhaps you could list what needs you and your wife need. It will be an honor to go before our great High Priest Jesus, and have the powerful Holy Spirit groan & interceed on your behalf that your bodies would prosper as your souls prosper.
 
This one is kind of circumstancial. Because what is in my head and I think your head is that there is some kind of regular meeting called a "prayer meeting" in which the whole church gathers. In this case, only allowing certain people to pray is either heretical or going to require a lot of explaining depending on which people those are. Of course, it is common practice that in a regular worship meeting not everyone is allowed to participate. This also seems against the Bible (I corinthians), but if this is accepted then at times the same reasons might be applied to the prayer meetings.

Worship is not equal to church. The church is a called out people who among other things worships.

In a well-functioning community, certain closed groups might form for prayer and not be called "the official prayer time of the church". Usually mens or women's groups. I can see in some cases where they might add a certain covenant to that. Probably not good most of the time, but I think they would be free to do that.

Not really enough information here to know, but seems like most churches have a official once a week prayer time. The Bible allows people to be excluded, but that's altogether and not just during prayer times.
Hi V

I don't really understand what a "closed group" could be. I haven't ever experienced any.
There's a group nearby called a "Leavening Group". They meet every Tuesday evening for prayer, reading of a verse etc.
However, everyone is invited to attend, even though there are regulars. They did NOT have to join the group in a formal manner.

As far as Worship. I do agree that there are some rules that have to be followed.
For instance, if one goes to a Mass and is protestant, they're not allowed to join in Communion because they do not believe in the doctrine of transubstantiation. This is understandable to me.

I went to a Luthern church years ago where I was asked by the Pastor if I was a believer in Jesus before he gave me the host. I believe Lutherans still believe in the Real Presence, as did Luther. In fact, I think he believed in transubstantiation till his death --- not sure.

A gal joining a men's group and V V is understandable.

You're right. I mean that anyone should be allowed to a general prayer meeting, as was the case in the O.P.'s statement.
And everyone should be allowed to attend worship, maybe making sure that communion is given only to a believer.

Church should be open to all (except in very few cases as above).
 
The fundamental problem is the church equating being saved with being a member of the church.
It's an extremely immature, if not worldly, way to think.
All by itself that thinking would tend to disqualify for me a church as a potential meeting place. It would be a sign to me that they're prolly not a group I'm going to encounter Christ in their meetings.
 
From what I read you do understand the concept of closed group, you just haven't experienced it.

It would not make sense at all in Catholicism, and is rare in the US institutional church. Sometimes you will find a house group that will be too full and not taking people anymore, so that would be a closed group. Women's groups are closed to men. There's no Biblical reason why you couldn't have a group closed to everyone but a certain age group- that might even be considered part of a graded Sunday School program. At the end of the day though, there usually aren't good reasons to want to make such a closed group.

Where persecution is more common, that changes. Small groups with rules intended to keep government spies out. Islamic Christian women in certain parts of the world. Chinese who do not believe in evolution. That sort of thing. They might or might not be secret. Probably in the near future, Christians who no longer believe in state marriage might do this. Or if the future goes a certain way, maybe those who do not want to register with the US government and adopt certain views might become secret and closed except by invitation for fear of being turned in as a hate group.

Or maybe people who host a house church but just don't feel like welcoming every stranger who wants to come over might be considered a closed group.
 
I myself have never been able to consistently stay in Church. Cliques form there like anywhere else and I can't stand religious snobbery. Little "polite" slights where people act innocent of doing them etc. I much prefer me and my Bible. Yes I am a tinge bitter lol.
We Christians often say to non-believers that we are no different or better than them. We're simply forgiven. This is to counter the stereotype of the "holier than thou" Christian.

So, we're the same in many ways as the rest of the world. We should behave differently, but we're human after all. Some are at a point in their walks where they more profoundly love their neighbors. Some aren't.

What I'm getting at is I expect clicks in any organization to some extent, because we're human. I expect that I won't be liked or appreciated by everyone in any organization, because we're human. I expect to disagree with some things in any organization, because we're human.

I don't expect more than any organization made up of people like me can deliver, and I believe that is why I don't I get frustrated or disappointed by my church as often as others do. I focus on ways to lift up others and be lifted. Most of all, I focus on my God and glorifying Him.
 
We Christians often say to non-believers that we are no different or better than them. We're simply forgiven. This is to counter the stereotype of the "holier than thou" Christian.

So, we're the same in many ways as the rest of the world. We should behave differently, but we're human after all. Some are at a point in their walks where they more profoundly love their neighbors. Some aren't.

What I'm getting at is I expect clicks in any organization to some extent, because we're human. I expect that I won't be liked or appreciated by everyone in any organization, because we're human. I expect to disagree with some things in any organization, because we're human.

I don't expect more than any organization made up of people like me can deliver, and I believe that is why I don't I get frustrated or disappointed by my church as often as others do. I focus on ways to lift up others and be lifted. Most of all, I focus on my God and glorifying Him.

Good point, to see Christ as the life of the believer cuts through alot of the doctrine stuff. At that point it doesn't matter, only Christ matters.
We are human and growing at our own pace, unique in creation. Being in both setting, one, where a corporate body gathers, two, where most had an understanding of what it means to have Christ as life. Both have Christ as life only one group really had a fix on it.
The conversation may be different and fellowship but the humanity part we are all left with still runs deep in every individual, we are human.
 
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