Aah, I was in such a good mood to be a smarty pants, but I'll be serious. I promise. I'll try to cover one thing at at a time.(not necessarily in order) Basic conclusion is that you seem to be covering every eventuality regardless of God's will in this. -I'm just thinking out loud. This is a journal, remember? You've also seemed to spark a renewed interest from Mama's girl -umm, no. Well, just an observation, so I guess you could say that. ...and someone that respects their parents isn't all that bad. -I agree with you, but I believe there should be some sort of boundary on what things you have to listen to your mom and where you have to listen to yourself. Don't get me wrong, I do respect my parent and listen to her advice, but I won't let her take control and hinder a relationship if I see promising signs in it. Married? You're really ready for that? -Yes, I do believe I am. Let's see: you have a well paying and secure employment, You have a home and car, -I do have a well paying job and secure**(see next response) employment. Car I do have. Two in fact, both paid off. One of them is 2yrs old, another 6yrs old. -House, I don't have yet, but I can make that happen. Currently living in a rental and watching market for a good opportunity. ...don't need the support of a wife's income so that she can care for all the children that suddenly come requiring approximately $250,000 each to raise to maturity the last I read. -raising children to maturity. Eugene, at this point, I will have to say that God will provide for the future. No one can plan for many years ahead of time. You can have a great job, nice house, but you cannot plan far away because you don't know what will happen in a couple years. You can also have great sum of money in savings, but "money can grow wings and fly away". I'm sure you know the meaning behind this sentence and not just take this as a light-hearted joke. I believe in the greater power of the Lord and I am certain that whatever future he has planned for me and for my family(whenever that happens), God has it planned for me. I'm open for advice, but currently this is where I stand.. It appears you may be a new beginning as a ministry; I've seen stranger things occur. -Eugene, this I have no clue what you mean..