Christ_empowered
Member
Praise God! I don't know if I really was "severely narcissistic," or...what. I -had- a lot of physically rooted problems. Early aging, thinning hair, dental problems, etc. That was even before I got into drugs and such. "Satan has a field day with weaklings," or so Verna says. I think she's on to something.
My parents now take good care of me. Keep in mind; I'm 33 years old, lived on the fringe for a bit over 10 years, and I started out as short, homely flamer w/ an attitude. Clearly, God has seen fit to spare me, and now I've been genuinely saved for 5 years.
I'm somehow no longer homely. I'm not short, I'm not a flamer. I -was- obviously brain damaged, and I'm not now. I even have a high(er) IQ estimate, which...raises some questions, I think.
mama needs me to clean up my room and my bathroom. I realized, as we were talking, that my parents are definitely -wonderful- people. They took care of me even when there was no hope and I was just a step or 2 above being a vegetable. I mean...people are not vegetables, but I don't know how else to express how low the shrinks and my own sins brought me. In most places, I'd probably be put in the back wards of a state hospital. "round here...there was an effort to get me sent off to prison. I ended up with a serious misdemeanor and probation, Praise God!
OK. Its just...wow. "Recovery;" what is it, really? I cannot return to baseline. When the shrinks got thru with me, people said "he'll never be the same." They were right, of course. 5 years ago, I got genuinely saved, and now...
I'm a New Creation in Christ Jesus, like any other Born Again Christian. I don't know if I'll ever have a job. I'm blessed to be on disability. The doctors made life miserable when I tried to work, miserable when I tried to go back to school, miserable when I "didn't know my/his place in society," etc. While I'm also grateful for the treatment I receive now, I see the "treatment" I received in years past as torture and bondage, oppression. Not good, not good at all.
I'm remarkably healthy now. 0 premature aging, somehow. People like me...are despised, especially in 21st century America. Maybe that's one reason The Lord has gone above and beyond for me, to show people that He still loves "the least of these," even if they don't?
I am, as the title says, increasingly grateful. I don't know what I'll end up doing with my life, where I'll go, etc. I hope The Lord changes me enough so I can be a prop to my parents when they get old. Other than that...
I really don't know what The Lord has for me, what I can realistically expect, etc., but I am increasingly grateful for the life I have now.
God is good!
My parents now take good care of me. Keep in mind; I'm 33 years old, lived on the fringe for a bit over 10 years, and I started out as short, homely flamer w/ an attitude. Clearly, God has seen fit to spare me, and now I've been genuinely saved for 5 years.
I'm somehow no longer homely. I'm not short, I'm not a flamer. I -was- obviously brain damaged, and I'm not now. I even have a high(er) IQ estimate, which...raises some questions, I think.
mama needs me to clean up my room and my bathroom. I realized, as we were talking, that my parents are definitely -wonderful- people. They took care of me even when there was no hope and I was just a step or 2 above being a vegetable. I mean...people are not vegetables, but I don't know how else to express how low the shrinks and my own sins brought me. In most places, I'd probably be put in the back wards of a state hospital. "round here...there was an effort to get me sent off to prison. I ended up with a serious misdemeanor and probation, Praise God!
OK. Its just...wow. "Recovery;" what is it, really? I cannot return to baseline. When the shrinks got thru with me, people said "he'll never be the same." They were right, of course. 5 years ago, I got genuinely saved, and now...
I'm a New Creation in Christ Jesus, like any other Born Again Christian. I don't know if I'll ever have a job. I'm blessed to be on disability. The doctors made life miserable when I tried to work, miserable when I tried to go back to school, miserable when I "didn't know my/his place in society," etc. While I'm also grateful for the treatment I receive now, I see the "treatment" I received in years past as torture and bondage, oppression. Not good, not good at all.
I'm remarkably healthy now. 0 premature aging, somehow. People like me...are despised, especially in 21st century America. Maybe that's one reason The Lord has gone above and beyond for me, to show people that He still loves "the least of these," even if they don't?
I am, as the title says, increasingly grateful. I don't know what I'll end up doing with my life, where I'll go, etc. I hope The Lord changes me enough so I can be a prop to my parents when they get old. Other than that...
I really don't know what The Lord has for me, what I can realistically expect, etc., but I am increasingly grateful for the life I have now.
God is good!
