Both my parents were atheists pretty much. Didn't go to church, received no Sunday school teaching, nothing. Filled my teen years with chasing girls and drinking booze. In my mid 20s my sin debt was considerable and depression started catching up with me. Funny thing is, I knew what was up, that I had to get forgiven. I'd prayed before but nothing. Finally I felt so removed from everything else that it was a last chance prayer and that was answered. I felt what I now know as the Holy Spirit which filled me with love. It wasn't my love that was within me it was the love of another being which I could feel more intensely than anything that came before in my life. It was really good. It led me to lay down on my bed and the last thing I thought before it put me out was 'if this doesn't let up I won't be able to go to work tomorrow'. The next day I was different. I did go to work and the afterglow of the visit went with me. A friend there who is a believer could tell, she asked me about it and I told her. She said I should go to church and get the basics and gave me the name of one so I went. Funny thing is, I'd always made fun of her beliefs but she was always patient. That said, I lived in New Jersey at the time, she wore little grenade earrings and said she was 'a warrior for Christ'. Yeah right. No, yeah, right.
So I went to the church and got the basics. Now I feel like I don't fit in where other believers are and I don't really know why. Its like other believers are focused elsewhere but we can't all be the same can we? When I became a believer did I start the transformation into you, or someone else? I grew up in a tough place and became a hard, unforgiving man and now I'm forgiven. Still the old things are with me, as are the changes. Its like I don't belong to the sinners and am still traveling towards salvation. Maybe one only completes the journey when death comes. I just know its a journey and I'm on it and I'm visiting these forums to share it and your journey as well.
So hi.
So I went to the church and got the basics. Now I feel like I don't fit in where other believers are and I don't really know why. Its like other believers are focused elsewhere but we can't all be the same can we? When I became a believer did I start the transformation into you, or someone else? I grew up in a tough place and became a hard, unforgiving man and now I'm forgiven. Still the old things are with me, as are the changes. Its like I don't belong to the sinners and am still traveling towards salvation. Maybe one only completes the journey when death comes. I just know its a journey and I'm on it and I'm visiting these forums to share it and your journey as well.
So hi.