Discussion in 'Parenting & Marriage' started by Featherbop, Mar 15, 2004.
:o I wish I could say yes,divorce should be illegal but I can't because the world we are in is so wicked and people do awful things to one another.It would be very sad if a christian man or woman got married to someone they thought was also christian,only to find out later that they were only pretending to be christian and became mean and abusive and cheated,it would be a very sad situation if they could not leave the marriage.
It takes time to know someone. Please be careful all single christians out there. Take time to know for sure that the other person is truly devoted to God before you marry. Do it for God and for you.
I know one thing:If divorce was outlawed, people sure would be a heck of a lot more careful with who they choose to marry.
......or maybe not.
:B-fly: It would make them think longer about it I'm sure,but it could also be used against those who are innocent.
If I'm in an abusive marriage, then I'd be getting a divorce.
If my husband cheated on me, I'd be getting a divorce (btw, God allows that in this case)
Outlawing divorce wouldn't do any good. Let people make their own decisions and live with them! If a marriage does end in divorce due to abuse or adultry, then let the guilty one live with the mistake.
Is it just me or is anyone else tired of this? :-?
:B-fly: I know,but there are those who pretend so good to be kind and gentle,they claim they are christian,and they can act good for a very long time,then when they marry the truth comes out.
God allowed divorce because the peoples hearts were hardened,but thats not what God wanted as you know and I know,because he hates divorce.
but, if people were smarter and dated and got to know the person for a long time, the deception could not be kept up for ever. The facade would weaken and they would both see the real person and not a mask of deception.
People are just stupid about these things. You can't cure stupid.
People are just stupid about these things. You can't cure stupid.
:B-fly: We can't cure it,but God sure can.
If we humble ourselves to The LORD,he can help us
get past ourselves. In the process,some very ugly masks begin to fall
off,and our flesh may try to resist the changes God is working in us,and the fear of the unknown journey ahead can make some people run back to their comfort zone,but if you are strong and hold on trusting God,you can get there,and you'll continue to grow. babies in Christ are cute,but so unaware of the wolves in sheeps clothing,at least we were at first,though we didn't think so,we thought we could spot a wolf easily back then.
Many people have appeared like they have forgotten about the jezebels who have snuck into the churches. Remember the story of Jezebel & Ahab?This is an example of some marraiges today,and some of the fake christians who have crept in christian circles to decieve the body of Christ.
Gotta watch those Jezebels and Ahabs of today!
Put it this way -
If God were in charge of legislation, would divorce be illegal?
Would divorce be tolerated in Heaven?
That should answer everyone's questions.
:B-fly: So right,so true! couldn't agree more!
If we all cared more about God's feelings we would care more about each other,amen.
Featherbop originally posted:
As a woman who dated a man for almost six years before marriage and was not aware of his abusive side until after we were wed, I am deeply offended by your posts. My ex-husband beat me and raped me and I never saw the signs in the five years we were together prior to getting married. Nobody deserves to be abused and the fact that you would suggest such is sickening. :x [/b]
Wow your concern and kindness for your fellow human beings is astonishing, the love pouring from your heart has rendered me speechless. This is a priceless example of the wonderful Christian love in full force here, your morality shines as a beacon to us all. BTW that was sarcasm. I can't believe that anybody could be as cold hearted and cruel as this, it's disgusting that you would say something like that. You are excusing abuse, your post essentially says that it's perfectly fine to beat your wife to a bloody pulp because she should have known better than to marry you.
Abuse is horribly wrong no matter how you twist it to justify your religion, the fact that you try to justify speaks wonders about your supposed "faith" when you posted that did you even stop and think about how it would affect a person who has lived in that kind of situation? Did the pain that they have endured cross your mind? Do you even care? Has it occurred to you that no one deserves to suffer like that, and they have every right to get away from an abusive situation. Anyone who would try to stop them from it is just as EVIL as the abuser.
your absolutely right only not in the way you think.
No one deserve to have the crap beaten out of them on a daily basis.
No one deserves to have their bones broken by a sadistic control freak.
No one deserves to wake up every morning with the thought, "Is this the day he's going to kill me?"
No one deserves to end up in a cold drawer in a morgue, bruised and unrecognizable to family and friends.
Males who abuse their wives almost always abuse their children. Do the children deserve to be beaten also?
Spend an hour talking to the women and children hiding out in an abused women's shelter and then tell me what you think.
How many years have you been married?
Yep. You're right. You can't cure stupid, as you have well proven here.
(What a way to start my first post to this forum)
I was married once before. The man was the 'perfect' Christian....on fire for God, a reader, a prayer, a studyer, etc. He was super sweet to me. He wooed me and I fell in love with him.
THE DAY AFTER WE GOT MARRIED, we were sitting around in our hotel room. He was completely ignoring me, with the exception of barking out a few orders here and there. Finally, sometime in the mid-afternoon, I asked him what was going on and why was he treating me like this?
His response, and I quote, "I've got you now. I don't have to be nice anymore."
I cannot describe the sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach at that moment. Just thinking about it some 15 years later literally makes my blood run cold.
But being as I was a "Good Christian," I tried...I mean I REALLY tried to make the marriage work. I finally left the jerk after almost three years of putting up with his ****. I left because I was a shell of a person. He had worn me down emotionally and spiritually. He was beginning to threaten me physically and I knew that if I stayed with him much longer, I wouldn't live much longer.
So tell me again how stupid we are. :evil:
I had an abusive father and I can tell you that nobody deserves to live with an abusive spouse/parent. I remember having anxiety attacks about 15 mintues before my Dad would get home from work....this is YEARS AFTER he stopped beating us.
Featherbop - um, I think YOU'RE just trying to ruffle some feathers but if you aren't - well, there's nothing I can say but experience is key and obviously you haven't had much experience with being married to an abusive person - or experienced in the way people can be. One day, your comments that you've made to others dear, may come to bite you in the butt. :
I hardly have the log-less eyes to call anyone a troll, but that is possibly the most ridiculous comment I've seen in... well, hours. It's still pretty darn ridiculous, though. Can you not appreciate that people can be deceived? That love can blind? That formerly perfect spouses can, with time, metamorphose into evil demon spawn from the pits of Hell itself? Should innocent people be forced to remain with their abusers on account of, at best, a naive mistake and at worst an evil twist of fate? And what of the children, as has been pointed out? And for what? A questionable directive written by who-knows-what-patriarchal-priest in a society with unique quirks that hasn't existed for thousands of years?
Marriage is a sacred trust. We all make mistakes, and I don't believe it should be dissolved for trivial or petty reasons. Even very serious offenses can be forgiven with time, ushering in an even stronger and more resilient love. Yet, to borrow a phrase from the Declaration of Independence, "But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism," it is a spouse's duty to dissolve the marital bonds and seek happiness elsewhere.
By the gods! That sounds terrifyingly close to what a serial killer might say once he was alone in the room with you. :o It makes my blood run cold, and I've seen a lot of similarly horrifying comments in my time...
I'm with you..whoever you are...they will obviously let anyone in this place. You look like a sutherner. Is ya one?
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