Thanks for all the advice everyone- keep it coming! I'm feeling a realization forming in my brain, that this is all part of growing together as a couple. After having a disasterous first marriage to someone who was needy, emotionally unbalanced and abusive, I went for someone who was a polar opposite. I will say that Stan has been my ROCK and his steadiness has helped ME come out of my shell as I know I can rely on him, but now his needing me isn't a growing character flaw but maybe him showing me that he's able to expose his vulnerable side. I should probably take his need for me as a compliment, like how when a cat exposes their belly to you, saying "here's where you could hurt me, but I trust you!". What does everyone think?
Regina, ...or, as you say you are coming out of your shell, Stan has always been that way, but in his love for you has kept it repressed or hidden and now that he sees you are growing emotionally and spiritually he is trusting you with who his is, like you trusted him with who you were at the beginning?
Truthfully I have found the key to a successful working marriage is,
a threefold cord is not quickly broken Ecc 4:12 and to do that the couple must be in agreement to be able to walk together Amos 3:3
In my own marriage I have found that not only is there an age difference of 15 years, but there is a huge cultural difference, myself coming from the American culture and her from a third world culture, I take things for granted that she has never even thought about, so I had/have to be very patience with her and follow the command of my Lord to love her as He loves the Church and gave Himself for her, that means I have to die to some of the things culturally I have learned to allow her to grow as the Lord is conforming her into the image of His Son, which in turn has the same result in my life.
There are only two basic rules for a successful and happy marriage, women honor and respect you husband (which carries with it submitting) so that means don't ever question his authority and men die to self and live to please your wife (which is also submission), ...question his authority and you go against the curse of God pronounced by God in the Garden on women Gen 3:16 and hubby blows his top, men be your natural selfish selves and fulfill your desires and interests, rather than dying to self for her and the well dries up.
Do you have a daily family alter time when you read the Word together, pray, take communion, does your husband lead it, if not then suggest to him you would like for him to start, that is the most important part of a marriage, both partners having a correct vertical relationship with the Father, that is the three stranded cord part, and in so doing you will both learn how to walk together in the path the Lord has planned for you.
Sounds simple doesn't it, ......I have found without the Lord it's impossible. LOL
Blessings
