handy
Member
We had a great Thanksgiving yesterday. I'm blessed with a good family.
Because of all the heath issues I had this year, my house was in less than stellar condition going into last week and hosting Thanksgiving was as good a reason as any to get things back into order now that I'm fully and completely recovered.
So, I've spent that last few days in an orgy of housecleaning...taking down light fixtures and washing them, moving furniture to track down every last dust bunny, scouring, shining, polishing....
I went to take my daughter to school on Wednesday only to find that I had a dead battery. In our town, you miss the bus and it's a it's an 84 mile round trip to get you to school. I wasn't about to ask my in-law's if they would do it, nor was I about to drive her down there myself, so she got an extra day off.
Poor girl. She was looking towards a sort of "party" day at school with her friends and instead I worked her tail off. Now, she's a good worker in the sense that she does a good job. But...she complains. And, she was in complain mode as I kept piling more and more chores on her Wednesday. I finally snapped at her and she backed off the complaining, but it was an irritant. But, we got through it and by the time Steve and Thomas came home Wednesday night, the place shone.
Thanksgiving Day dawns and my house is spic and span clean from top to bottom. It was such a relief to have a totally and completely clean house that I had all kinds of energy. I popped out of bed, hopped in the shower and before you know it, I was in the kitchen. Pumpkin pies, apple pies, and the turkey complete with stuffing were first on the list. All from scratch...no cans or boxes involved. I don't "cheat" on Thanksgiving. I had intended to cook down the pumpkin the day before, but I didn't so that added yet another task. No matter, I enjoy cooking from scratch and I think pumpkin pie is better when one uses a fresh pumpkin.
I washed up as I went along, but by noon, there was an accumulation of mess in the kitchen. I got the turkey into the roaster by 12:30 and decided that I was going to take a lunch break.
Steve and Thomas were playing a video game, but they had just come in from outside, having taken care of all the outdoor chores...Viola had been on Facebook chatting with friends most of the morning. I called Viola in to have her do up the dishes and re-tidy the kitchen while I (was going to) eat some lunch.
She. Flipped. Out. I can only chalk it up to emotionally/hormonally charged adolescence. She does have a very bad habit of being complaintive about doing things, but usually she'll get in there and do what's being asked of her. However, apparently she felt that she had fulfilled her obligations by the cleaning on Wednesday. It was the height of unfairness to ask her to do anything more.
She stormed and raged until she finally provoked me into losing my rather terrible temper. Then the battle was truly engaged. Poor Thomas just headed to his room and Steve started to try to keep us from killing each other with the potato peelers. When Steve got us separated to our corners we sat and fumed at each other for a while...then started to calm down.
That's when I explained to her...for women, holidays are work. Very hard work. I asked her to remember back on all the Thanksgivings and Christmases and Memorial Days...what was I doing all those times. While she was having fun with her brother, playing games, sledding, whatever, what had I been doing.
I saw her look back into time, remembering me...In the kitchen. Cooking, cleaning. It's not that I never get help...my family has always been good at pitching in, but hey, if I'm hosting the holiday, I'm in the kitchen or dining room the entire day. It's just the way it is, and there's not a woman on this board that doesn't relate, I'm sure.
This look of horror came across my daughter's face. She's been growing up quite a bit and her perceptions of adult life are slowly but surely moving from the ideal of "being able to do whatever I want" to the responsibilities that come with growing up. She realized that all her fond memories of Thanksgivings, Christmases and Easters were that way because someone had worked very hard to make them so. She also realized that, in the no so distant future...the responsibility of getting the cleaning and cooking done on the holidays is going to be up to her...when she has her own family. I could read the play of emotion crossing over her face. Then, just as clearly as if it had been written across her forehead, the holidays their magic for my growing girl.
She cleaned up the kitchen...honestly it truly wasn't that dirty, just some mixing bowls and sauce pans to wash and some fruit/veggie parings to take out to the critters, wiping down of the counter and done.
Later, when the time came to make up all the hot side dishes, she came in to help, without being asked and no complaining. We started talking, then laughing. Soon we were having a great time as we chopped, peeled, and made green bean casserole.
After dinner, Steve and his folks moved into the living room. Normally my mother-in-law would be helping clean up, but she was feeling a little under the weather so I told her to go sit down. I had Thomas and Viola put all the left overs into containers and clear the dirty dishes off the table. Then, Thomas wandered out to the living room and Viola and I started handwashing all the china, silver and crystal. At one point, as she was putting things back into the china cabinet, she came back to the kitchen and said, "Why are all the men just sitting out there doing nothing." And I said, "That's the way it is honey...one of these days you'll have a man out there sitting as well. It won't bug you as much as you might think it will." She agreed and continued to dry dishes. We continued chatting and talking and suddenly, she gave me this great big hug. She said, "This is fun mom...it really is."
It's not the holiday magic that she's used to...that childhood excitement of unadulterated fun. But, it's still good and I'm glad she realizes it.
Because of all the heath issues I had this year, my house was in less than stellar condition going into last week and hosting Thanksgiving was as good a reason as any to get things back into order now that I'm fully and completely recovered.
So, I've spent that last few days in an orgy of housecleaning...taking down light fixtures and washing them, moving furniture to track down every last dust bunny, scouring, shining, polishing....
I went to take my daughter to school on Wednesday only to find that I had a dead battery. In our town, you miss the bus and it's a it's an 84 mile round trip to get you to school. I wasn't about to ask my in-law's if they would do it, nor was I about to drive her down there myself, so she got an extra day off.
Poor girl. She was looking towards a sort of "party" day at school with her friends and instead I worked her tail off. Now, she's a good worker in the sense that she does a good job. But...she complains. And, she was in complain mode as I kept piling more and more chores on her Wednesday. I finally snapped at her and she backed off the complaining, but it was an irritant. But, we got through it and by the time Steve and Thomas came home Wednesday night, the place shone.
Thanksgiving Day dawns and my house is spic and span clean from top to bottom. It was such a relief to have a totally and completely clean house that I had all kinds of energy. I popped out of bed, hopped in the shower and before you know it, I was in the kitchen. Pumpkin pies, apple pies, and the turkey complete with stuffing were first on the list. All from scratch...no cans or boxes involved. I don't "cheat" on Thanksgiving. I had intended to cook down the pumpkin the day before, but I didn't so that added yet another task. No matter, I enjoy cooking from scratch and I think pumpkin pie is better when one uses a fresh pumpkin.
I washed up as I went along, but by noon, there was an accumulation of mess in the kitchen. I got the turkey into the roaster by 12:30 and decided that I was going to take a lunch break.
Steve and Thomas were playing a video game, but they had just come in from outside, having taken care of all the outdoor chores...Viola had been on Facebook chatting with friends most of the morning. I called Viola in to have her do up the dishes and re-tidy the kitchen while I (was going to) eat some lunch.
She. Flipped. Out. I can only chalk it up to emotionally/hormonally charged adolescence. She does have a very bad habit of being complaintive about doing things, but usually she'll get in there and do what's being asked of her. However, apparently she felt that she had fulfilled her obligations by the cleaning on Wednesday. It was the height of unfairness to ask her to do anything more.
She stormed and raged until she finally provoked me into losing my rather terrible temper. Then the battle was truly engaged. Poor Thomas just headed to his room and Steve started to try to keep us from killing each other with the potato peelers. When Steve got us separated to our corners we sat and fumed at each other for a while...then started to calm down.
That's when I explained to her...for women, holidays are work. Very hard work. I asked her to remember back on all the Thanksgivings and Christmases and Memorial Days...what was I doing all those times. While she was having fun with her brother, playing games, sledding, whatever, what had I been doing.
I saw her look back into time, remembering me...In the kitchen. Cooking, cleaning. It's not that I never get help...my family has always been good at pitching in, but hey, if I'm hosting the holiday, I'm in the kitchen or dining room the entire day. It's just the way it is, and there's not a woman on this board that doesn't relate, I'm sure.
This look of horror came across my daughter's face. She's been growing up quite a bit and her perceptions of adult life are slowly but surely moving from the ideal of "being able to do whatever I want" to the responsibilities that come with growing up. She realized that all her fond memories of Thanksgivings, Christmases and Easters were that way because someone had worked very hard to make them so. She also realized that, in the no so distant future...the responsibility of getting the cleaning and cooking done on the holidays is going to be up to her...when she has her own family. I could read the play of emotion crossing over her face. Then, just as clearly as if it had been written across her forehead, the holidays their magic for my growing girl.
She cleaned up the kitchen...honestly it truly wasn't that dirty, just some mixing bowls and sauce pans to wash and some fruit/veggie parings to take out to the critters, wiping down of the counter and done.
Later, when the time came to make up all the hot side dishes, she came in to help, without being asked and no complaining. We started talking, then laughing. Soon we were having a great time as we chopped, peeled, and made green bean casserole.
After dinner, Steve and his folks moved into the living room. Normally my mother-in-law would be helping clean up, but she was feeling a little under the weather so I told her to go sit down. I had Thomas and Viola put all the left overs into containers and clear the dirty dishes off the table. Then, Thomas wandered out to the living room and Viola and I started handwashing all the china, silver and crystal. At one point, as she was putting things back into the china cabinet, she came back to the kitchen and said, "Why are all the men just sitting out there doing nothing." And I said, "That's the way it is honey...one of these days you'll have a man out there sitting as well. It won't bug you as much as you might think it will." She agreed and continued to dry dishes. We continued chatting and talking and suddenly, she gave me this great big hug. She said, "This is fun mom...it really is."
It's not the holiday magic that she's used to...that childhood excitement of unadulterated fun. But, it's still good and I'm glad she realizes it.
The otherway round is preferable.
