[__ Prayer __] please pray for my freedom...

[Christ_empowered]

...from my past, especially my mental health history.

My former shrinks consider me a "trouble maker." Just as God has good plans for His children, so too, do these mental health "professionals" have plans for me...and they're not good. These are the docs who over-medicated me as a teenager, did involuntary, heavy ECT when I was in my 20s, and spread my confidential info when I was "poor white trash" (I don't personally use that phrase, but...they do. Towards me, in particular).

I'm not nearly as scared as I used to be. Fret not because of evil-doers. God has given me (increasingly) a spirit not of timidity, but of a sound mind. I'm obviously very much a work in progress.

The stuff some people in my neighborhood scream at me comes straight from my (obviously pencil-whipped) old records. No matter. I can tune them out, of course.

I guess God is neither pro-psychiatry nor anti-psychiatry. His ways are higher than our ways...

...because He is using my current treatment people to keep me free. I'm not anti-medication (when needed) or whatever, but I'm obviously not keen on living in shrink-controlled slavery, which is what my former (private practi$e) shrinks want for me, and what they had, for a season.

Its just rough, that's all. A lot of my troubles right now boil down to being labeled a "trouble maker." Truth is, I was a low on the totem pole loser with (back then) a low IQ, premature aging, and a load of problems. Destroy him. Big deal, right? Especially when the private, for-profit hospital made a pretty penny off my parents and insurance company...and then demanded more.

I'm just now becoming normal, and that's all because of Jesus Christ. Yes, the people in my life facilitate His work (on good days, lol) and I'm doing better about applying Christian morality and such, but...

...yeah, Jesus is good to us, even the losers.

So, this is scary stuff. My parents already had to hire 1 attorney because of an angry ex-shrink. Had it not been for the attorney, I'd be a convicted felon (at best), in a state mental hospital (IF they were feeling semi-merciful), or possible (worst case scenario) in the lovely state prison "For the Criminally Insane." As is, I plead guilty to a serious misdemeanor and received the maximum probation because of my angry ex-shrink making a long speech about me at my sentencing hearing.

Anyway...I'm not some bitter ex-patient, at least not anymore. I'm a *disillusioned* former mental patient who still needs services, at least for the time being. Kind of a tough situation. More importantly, I'm a child of The Most High God, and I can't help but notice that all the (many) good things He has done is doing in my life infuriate my former "treatment team."

Ramble ramble ramble...please pray for my freedom and safety. Thanks

 

[Deborah13]

 

[jeff77]

Praying, you have come a long way so hang in there.

 

[Eugene]

Continuing in prayer that God gives you the power to go forward with your life regardless the opposition, and one day gives you the peace to fully be restored to the inheritance He wills for you. May God erase the past completely from your thoughts, the accusations by others, and any possible judgment of the law. God has freed you to have His best in Christ Jesus, and if allowed will lead you in every path designed especially for the righteousness He wants to see in you. Be blessed.

 

[iLOVE]

Nothing can stand against our God. Whatever you face in life, if you will just hold your peace and remain at rest, God promises He will fight your battles. He will make a way even when you don't see a way. Isaiah 66:9 NCV says it like this, "I will not cause pain without allowing something new to be born says the Lord."

The Bible says the prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective, yet something extraordinary happens when two or more agree together in prayer. In Matt. 18:19, Jesus said, “If any two of you agree touching any matter on this earth, it shall be done.” Press like if you agree to this prayer for Christ_empowered and also for yourself.

My prayer for you and for all who agree:

Father, I thank You that You are a God of miracles. You reach into our natural lives and do Your supernatural work.

Today I pray for the miraculous in my life. I ask that You do something bigger than I can do on my own. Heal every sickness, provide for each need, restore the broken places and make every God-given dream come true.

I remember how You have worked in my life in the past, and I take comfort that You will do it again in my future. With you, nothing is too difficult. You make the impossible possible. I claim that in my life today.

In Jesus Name, Amen

See Psalm 105:5 and John 14:12-13

 

[Christ_empowered]

Thanks, y'all.

Its just...sometimes frightening. Even with a good attorney, mental patients are 2nd class citizens. And if your (ex)shrinks come after you...GOOD LUCK! Truth is, a lot of it is social class related. Shrinks are often used to keep poor people "in line." If they can't be sent to prison, maybe a mental hospital? See what I'm saying?

So, God blessed my parents with what around here is considered "upper class" status. OK. God moved on my dad's heart to take me in, hire a good attorney. Awesome. Now, people are upset that "poor white trash" is living so comfortably, looking so healthy, etc. Like I think I wrote before...God's work in my life fills a lot of people around here with rage. I mean, there's venomous hatred towards me around here, and it freaks me out sometimes.

People in this neighborhood--mostly one set of neighbors, in particular--sometimes scream about "federal warrants," and that's scary. They've been screaming about that since before I went to court for sentencing per my plea deal. Had there been one, a) my attorney would have known and b) I would have been arrested. I also got pulled over a few months ago (driving w/o glasses out of forgetfulness...stupid, I know). They ran my license and let me go, so...

...yeah. The best I can come up with is that people want me to go crazy or do something stupid so I'll end up in jail, a mental hospital, or something like that. Not gonna happen. Schizophrenic people often talk of "the feds" and such, so...maybe that's where this comes from? Oh, that and apparently federal warrants are sealed until served. I couldn't find out about one if I wanted to, not without a skilled attorney. That said, my ex-shrinks hate me so much...I mean, heavy drugging, forced ECT. Once, at the first (Private, expensive) mental hospital, they let me OD on Restoril, an old school sleeping pill in the Valium family. I wet the bed I was so sedated. They just left me wallowing in my filth and kept putting more pressure on me. So, when I hear people talk of "federal warrants," I now stay cool (thank God!), but I wonder...with that much hatred towards me...could something be happening? I dunno...

...anyway, thanks again. And please, please, please keep those prayers coming!

 

[ReginaForbes]

Heavenly Father, in the name of your son Jesus, I pray for you to send angels to guide and protect our dear brother in Christ. Lord God, as you champion the cause of the forgotten, the outcast, and the least of society, please champion Christ_empowered's cause. Lord, You proclaim freedom for the captives and in doing so, with full confidence I know You will help our dear brother in Christ. Blessed is our God for He protects His children! Amen.

 

[GrannyJ]

You are often in my prayers. God has you safe in his hands, and whatever happens he is in control. No need to fear, no need to freat and worry. He will lead you safe through life's journey.

 

[Christ_empowered]

Hey y'all.

Thanks for the insight and the prayers. Truth is, the federal warrants thing is probably either to harass me or yet another ridiculous rumor. People have been talking, off and on, about "federal warrants" for about 2 years now, well before I went to another part of the state for sentencing for my misdemeanor. That was 1 year ago, and it was kept out of court for 1 year before that.

OK. Breathe deep, right? Right. I just did some studying for Liberty (not near enough...this stuff has ruined my concentration!), and this one sentence popped out of me. The context was Ezra, (re)building the wall or whatever, and it said, basically, that God's work in our world always meets with opposition. Pentecostals call that "spiritual warfare." I'm not one to give the Devil too much credit, but apparently I don't give him enough credit, either (raised PCUSA...happens). Anyway, I think watching a burned out, girly, not too bright flamer transform, by God's grace, into...well...the new me (healthy, increasingly masculine, surprisingly bright) really "brings out the demon" in people.

I need to get over it. Like I said, its ruining my concentration, and I can't have that. I bombed an online quiz @ Liberty. Luckily for me, my writing skills are good, so I do well on the writing, and its a writing-intensive class. YES! I aced the quiz in the other class (go figure, right?).

UGH!!!!

 

[AirDancer]

When you initially joined CFnet, my friend, you knew - absolutely knew - that as a member of our Lord's family, you are empowered. Jesus saw to it we each would be empowered by and through faith. You have made amazing strides in your relationship with our Lord during the time you have be in fellowship with us here at CFnet, and the best is yet to come as your relationship strengthens & deepens.

Continue praying for those who persist in their ignorance & jealousy towards you. Keep firm hold on our Lord's hand when those people try to trouble you, and simply thank our Lord for His love & mercy & grace. Whatever you do, do not allow those people to have victory over you by moving your focus away from where it should be. Through the blessings, strength & love of our Lord, those people hold no power over you.

 

[GrannyJ]

It's very difficult for people to accept a new perspective on anyone they thought they knew, and they often react with a certain amount of anger and ridicule. Look at the reception Jesus got in Nazereth in Matthew 13. The people had always known him as a simple carpenter; they could not accept that he was now much more than this. As he himself said: " A prophet is not without honor except in his own town, among his relatives and in his own home". Did he let that deflect him from his mission? No, he accepted it and moved on with what he needed to do.

 

[Christ_empowered]

yeah...

...to be fair, I only repented and got saved a little less than 2 years ago, age 28. I don't know how I even had the sense to get saved. Like, I knew *about* Jesus, but I couldn't make the connection, I think in part because of all the (heavy, involuntary) ECT. But, God made it happen and it happened.

Since then, its been I guess fairly rapid change. I even moved back in with my parents, which was never supposed to happen. Now people around here are mad about everything good that The Lord has done and is doing in my life. Can't say I completely blame them, but...I do wish they'd stop yelling/screaming/.talking really loudly to get their point across, you know?

 

[Christ_empowered]

Also...I was never supposed to recover. Again, this is how poor mental patients are treated. I was labeled a "trouble maker" back when my parents were "rinky dink middle class" (other peoples' words, not mine). My former shrink at a private, for profit mental hospital would openly say stuff like "yeah, we broke him!" and people would laugh.

So...almost 2 years ago, I came to repentance. Now, I seem to have mysteriously "recovered," despite everything...and I do mean EVERYTHING that's been thrown at me. Its ridiculous, really. Somehow, this whole little town got so used to treating me a certain way and its almost like part of my "role" in this town was to be a simpleton, you know?

So now, God has blessed me with recovery. I'm not the same person, of course, but...wow...recovery is a beautiful thing. And it was never supposed to happen. Shrinks generally don't let poor "trouble makers" recovery from what they subject us to. Just not in the cards.

Maybe I'm just looking in the wrong place for compassion, lol. I'm just now learning that about 90% of people DO NOT have a Biblical Worldview. Some of them claim Christ, sure, some even go to church often. But, seriously--"Many are called, few are chosen." Even some "Born Again Christians" around here despise me, and I can't hold it against them. Not that how you treat *me* determines your standing, but how you treat "the least of these" does, according to The Bible.

Sometimes, I wonder what it all means, and not just for me. I was ugly, stupid, stunted, obviously brain damaged, hated, sickly. Now, I'm...not. Yes, I've been blessed, but what of those who oppressed me and despise me now, now that I'm recovering and have largely recovered only by the grace of God? See what I'm saying? People would openly go around saying "he's gonna be dead in a couple years!," stuff like that. That was 8 years ago!