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Dave Slayer
Guest
What is the worst pun you have ever heard?
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Nick
Member
I have heard soooo many (and cracked many) - where do I start?
Some bad ones are:
"Look at that clock - what a waste of time!"
"Well I'm handing out the clock jokes today!"
And a doctor doctor joke (so many of these, but will only make you suffer through one)
"Doctor Doctor, I think I'm turning into a rubber band!"
"Well go and stretch yourself out on the couch over there!"
Some bad ones are:
"Look at that clock - what a waste of time!"
"Well I'm handing out the clock jokes today!"
And a doctor doctor joke (so many of these, but will only make you suffer through one)
"Doctor Doctor, I think I'm turning into a rubber band!"
"Well go and stretch yourself out on the couch over there!"
I love to hijack threads but it is considered impolite and since as a Christian there is concern for my testimony before all men, I'm torn about actually doing that here. Still, since there are stories to be told, and threads to tell them in: and Christian brothers and sisters to listen? Will we say Liberty and amen, Sparrow? Of course we will. 
So there I was shopping at the local supermarket and pondering if I should buy pork or not and thinking of every body here and asking God to bless us when this guy rudely bumps into me.
HEY! What'cha think yer doing buddy? I demand.
Well, we begin talking and he introduces himself as, "Arthur, but you may call me 'Artie'," and begins to tell me his story of woe. It turns out that his wife is being held ransom and he must get the grand sum of $1 to purchase her safety.
Now, I've heard 'em all, I think as I gently turn from the plight of my neighbor.
It wasn't long before I was done with my shopping and had almost forgotten the encounter. While going up to the cash register I heard sound of a struggle. There was Arthur with his hands around the throat of another customer! After he quickly dispatches her he grabs the throat of another, "Will you give me my dollar??" he bellows?
Now believe me I was scared and thankful too because he seemed so calm after we had spoken. I could tell that he was in a hurry but assumed he was just another pan-handler which clearly wasn't the case what-so-ever. The next day it became clear when I read the headline in the newspaper:[attachment=0:m25zgum4]fake headline.jpg[/attachment:m25zgum4]
~Sparrowhawke
I’ve been reading something very interesting  Stephen Hawking’s latest book about anti-gravity.
I just can’t put it down.
So there I was shopping at the local supermarket and pondering if I should buy pork or not and thinking of every body here and asking God to bless us when this guy rudely bumps into me.
HEY! What'cha think yer doing buddy? I demand.
Well, we begin talking and he introduces himself as, "Arthur, but you may call me 'Artie'," and begins to tell me his story of woe. It turns out that his wife is being held ransom and he must get the grand sum of $1 to purchase her safety.
Now, I've heard 'em all, I think as I gently turn from the plight of my neighbor.
It wasn't long before I was done with my shopping and had almost forgotten the encounter. While going up to the cash register I heard sound of a struggle. There was Arthur with his hands around the throat of another customer! After he quickly dispatches her he grabs the throat of another, "Will you give me my dollar??" he bellows?
Now believe me I was scared and thankful too because he seemed so calm after we had spoken. I could tell that he was in a hurry but assumed he was just another pan-handler which clearly wasn't the case what-so-ever. The next day it became clear when I read the headline in the newspaper:[attachment=0:m25zgum4]fake headline.jpg[/attachment:m25zgum4]
~Sparrowhawke
I’ve been reading something very interesting  Stephen Hawking’s latest book about anti-gravity.
I just can’t put it down.