What's new
  • Do not use Chrome Incognito when registering as it freezes the registration page.
  • Guest, Join Papa Zoom today for some uplifting biblical encouragement! --> Daily Verses
  • No longer will OSAS vx OSNAS be allowed to be debated, argued, or discussed in theology forum. Too much time is required to monitor and rescources used to debate this subject which hasn't been definitively decided in 3,000 years.

As An Engaged Woman This Terrifies Me

HeIsRisen2018

Summer Rose (Methodist and New J.C Hammer lol)
Member
Joined
Dec 29, 2017
Messages
12,451
Gender
Female
I just had a nightmare about it last night too. Since I am mentally challenged and so is my fiancee, my biggest fear is that we won't be able to raise a family together. In my nightmare last night we had to listen to people laugh at us and mock us that we wouldn't be able to and it felt like being back in school. Although the adult world is much kinder to both of us, this is still a worry that I know we share. :sad Any advice for us would be gladly appreciated.
 

WIP

Staff member
Moderator
Joined
Dec 11, 2010
Messages
10,231
Gender
Male
Christian
Yes
Why do you think you might not be able to have children?
 

HeIsRisen2018

Summer Rose (Methodist and New J.C Hammer lol)
Member
Joined
Dec 29, 2017
Messages
12,451
Gender
Female
Why do you think you might not be able to have children?

Cause of the fact that we have learning disabilities and I'm not sure if we can be capable of raising children when one day they might become smarter than us. Then again, I know parents who aren't mentally handicapped and I believe that their children are still smarter then them so,.. :lol
 

Not_Now.Soon

Member
Joined
Aug 16, 2015
Messages
2,184
Gender
Male
Christian
Yes
If you can provide safety, and love, and you can try to raise them with respect and be responsible, thenI'm sure you'll do well. If you and your fiancee talk about raising kids together (both before you have kids on the things that are important to you guys to do or not do, and while you have kids just to communicate) then be on the same team. And I'm sure that'll help. Kids might be appreciative or they might be a struggle, (or both), but if you teach them to be respectful, encourage them in the good things they are interested in (sports, music, woodworking, etc), then you'll do great at providing love for them. Just help them in their faith too, and you'll do great.

...Sorry if the list got long, but all of these things I think you can do. They are what I think are important for being a parent, and I think you can do all of them.
 

HeIsRisen2018

Summer Rose (Methodist and New J.C Hammer lol)
Member
Joined
Dec 29, 2017
Messages
12,451
Gender
Female
If you can provide safety, and love, and you can try to raise them with respect and be responsible, thenI'm sure you'll do well. If you and your fiancee talk about raising kids together (both before you have kids on the things that are important to you guys to do or not do, and while you have kids just to communicate) then be on the same team. And I'm sure that'll help. Kids might be appreciative or they might be a struggle, (or both), but if you teach them to be respectful, encourage them in the good things they are interested in (sports, music, woodworking, etc), then you'll do great at providing love for them. Just help them in their faith too, and you'll do great.

...Sorry if the list got long, but all of these things I think you can do. They are what I think are important for being a parent, and I think you can do all of them.


Thank you for all of your advice but one quick thing, although I will teach them about God and Jesus I will never force my faith upon them. I want them to decide to come to the Lord on their own. He gave me the free will to choose and I will do the same for them and just pray that they make the right choice.
 

Not_Now.Soon

Member
Joined
Aug 16, 2015
Messages
2,184
Gender
Male
Christian
Yes
Thank you for all of your advice but one quick thing, although I will teach them about God and Jesus I will never force my faith upon them. I want them to decide to come to the Lord on their own. He gave me the free will to choose and I will do the same for them and just pray that they make the right choice.
Do what you think is right. Just don't shy away from it all together. I get the feeling of a sociatial standard to not teach about God at all, and I don't agree with that. My parents didn't try to force me to their beliefs but they shared their faiths with me. I went to church with my mom, and to Baha'i meetings with my dad. Though I latter searched for God on my own, and searched what religions could be from Him, I believed that He was there from an early age. I'm glad for my parents for that. There was love and commitment there. Both faith communities as friends that believed in God as well as school friends that some believed and others didn't.

Do what you think is right, and talk with your fiencee about it. I think that way regardless what you do, you'll do it together.
 

HeIsRisen2018

Summer Rose (Methodist and New J.C Hammer lol)
Member
Joined
Dec 29, 2017
Messages
12,451
Gender
Female
Do what you think is right. Just don't shy away from it all together. I get the feeling of a sociatial standard to not teach about God at all, and I don't agree with that. My parents didn't try to force me to their beliefs but they shared their faiths with me. I went to church with my mom, and to Baha'i meetings with my dad. Though I latter searched for God on my own, and searched what religions could be from Him, I believed that He was there from an early age. I'm glad for my parents for that. There was love and commitment there. Both faith communities as friends that believed in God as well as school friends that some believed and others didn't.

Do what you think is right, and talk with your fiencee about it. I think that way regardless what you do, you'll do it together.



:agreed
 

WIP

Staff member
Moderator
Joined
Dec 11, 2010
Messages
10,231
Gender
Male
Christian
Yes
Thank you for all of your advice but one quick thing, although I will teach them about God and Jesus I will never force my faith upon them. I want them to decide to come to the Lord on their own. He gave me the free will to choose and I will do the same for them and just pray that they make the right choice.
The thing to be careful about is that you don't give the impression that God is debatable. What I mean by that is, as parents you live your faith in all you do. You make no excuses or apologies for your faith. It is what you believe and it is part of your lifestyle so unless they begin to ask questions, don't bring up discussions for the purpose of debating alternative beliefs because the truth is, there are no alternative options. There is only one God and that's it.

Here's an example of what I'm talking about. My son is not a believer. When my 9-year old grandson comes to my house and we sit down to dinner, if he starts to eat before we pray, I will tell him that we will take a moment to thank God for providing the dinner. Likewise, on Sunday when we go to church services, I do not give him a choice whether he would like to attend with me or not. We go to church and he is in my care so he goes to church. Done deal.

If I decide to mention God during conversation, I do it without hesitation or apology. When I visit my son's house, I offer to pray before our meals and he and his family have not yet denied me that option. If they did, I would simply do it myself. Whether they joined me or not would be up to them but I won't require it of them nor would I say anything about it.

The whole idea is that I am demonstrating plain and simple that God is a part of my life.
 

HeIsRisen2018

Summer Rose (Methodist and New J.C Hammer lol)
Member
Joined
Dec 29, 2017
Messages
12,451
Gender
Female
The thing to be careful about is that you don't give the impression that God is debatable. What I mean by that is, as parents you live your faith in all you do. You make no excuses or apologies for your faith. It is what you believe and it is part of your lifestyle so unless they begin to ask questions, don't bring up discussions for the purpose of debating alternative beliefs because the truth is, there are no alternative options. There is only one God and that's it.

Here's an example of what I'm talking about. My son is not a believer. When my 9-year old grandson comes to my house and we sit down to dinner, if he starts to eat before we pray, I will tell him that we will take a moment to thank God for providing the dinner. Likewise, on Sunday when we go to church services, I do not give him a choice whether he would like to attend with me or not. We go to church and he is in my care so he goes to church. Done deal.

If I decide to mention God during conversation, I do it without hesitation or apology. When I visit my son's house, I offer to pray before our meals and he and his family have not yet denied me that option. If they did, I would simply do it myself. Whether they joined me or not would be up to them but I won't require it of them nor would I say anything about it.

The whole idea is that I am demonstrating plain and simple that God is a part of my life.


I took a few moments to respond to this because although I don't believe that church should ever be forced on a non-believing child,.. at least that child will learn about who Jesus is and in the end might decide to come to Him after all. So, I can see it both ways. In the end, it's always the decision of whoever raises or watches the kids.
 

Please consider donating

Total amount
$737.00
Goal
$4,080.00
Top