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Credit Checks on your Girl/Boyfriend

Pizza

Member
So, how far into a relationship is it appropriate to check the person's credit? (Asking for a friend, don't freak out.)
 
Never. It is better to go through pre-marital counseling than doing a credit check. Although, it has to be a rather robust counseling, otherwise it is a waste of time. My wife and I went through one, though after we were already married, that had us go through some very serious questions about almost everything that a couple should know about each other prior to getting married.

I big test whether or not you would be compatible financially is if your partner is willing to combine accounts. If they give significant hesitation that should be a pretty big red flag.
 
Never. It is better to go through pre-marital counseling than doing a credit check. Although, it has to be a rather robust counseling, otherwise it is a waste of time. My wife and I went through one, though after we were already married, that had us go through some very serious questions about almost everything that a couple should know about each other prior to getting married.

I big test whether or not you would be compatible financially is if your partner is willing to combine accounts. If they give significant hesitation that should be a pretty big red flag.
Some dont combine accounts ,I didn't for a few months because of business accounts my wife had but we shared.if your spouse owes taxes before you married her so will you! I had to pay her back taxes.
 
If you are in a growing relationship and you start to feel concerned enough to check your potential partner-to-be's credit then maybe it is a good idea to do it then and there. Like if you are getting worried about it, be honest about it and get it sorted. Talk about it together.

Interesting how a person's spending patterns before marriage can seem fine but the same pattern after marriage can be terrible. For example, he thinks she is so beautiful, always looking awesome. After getting married, he finds out she spends a small fortune on keeping her looks updated with the fashions and she has little money for anything else. Another example, she thinks it fantastic before marriage when he takes her on a date driving a luxury car. After marriage, she finds he lives like he is a millionaire but it is all credit and he owes a packet.

Recently I saw a documentary showing young people living off their credit cards. The amount of debt was staggering. And the young folk didn't think it wrong. To them, maxing out their credit was the only way to get the things they really had to have. Certainly not the way I was brought up which was to do without. Not all young people live that way but since it is common practice then credit stuff best talked about before tying the knot.

Watching Thomas
 
I think it would be a bad idea and really has very little if nothing to do with the relationship. It's only money. So...what? If she has bad credit then suddenly you don't love her or want to marry her? That's...kinda weird.

Don't sweat the small stuff.
 
dirtfarmer here

I thought the marriage vows stated: " In sickness and in health, in riches and in poverty". etc,

I was raised on a farm and 2 mules can pull a loaded wagon, where one mule struggles. It does take both mules pulling together, not one lagging behind the other.
 
i dunno. i guess if marriage is a serious possibility, one would want to know --exactly-- who (and what) one is getting involved with, right?

At the same time, I would hope that if someone is seriously dating someone+marriage is in the cards ((I'm thinking mostly of Christians here)), then at that point one would have a good idea of the other person's background, financial status, spending habits, etc.

Do intensive credit checks require a signed consent form from the person you're doing the check on? Or can one just go to a website, pay some $$$, and get the information?
 
So, how far into a relationship is it appropriate to check the person's credit? (Asking for a friend, don't freak out.)
When your prepared to buy something together that requires both scores to be at a certain level.

Money and how we manage it is important, but it all comes down to the relationship. If one can manage money, but not the relationship in regard to the money, then a credit score doesn't really mean much the way I see it.

On the flip side, if they can't manage money, then they have to relinquish that role in the relationship.
 
I think it would be a bad idea and really has very little if nothing to do with the relationship. It's only money. So...what? If she has bad credit then suddenly you don't love her or want to marry her? That's...kinda weird.

Don't sweat the small stuff.
Ha! Until you find your credit card maxed out and your mortgage behind to the poi t of foreclosure. But boy does she look hot in that dress Lol!

Just kidding brother lol!
 
Sheldon Cooper apparently thinks the time to run her credit is before moving in together. (Inspiration for me to ask this question.)

 
i dunno. i guess if marriage is a serious possibility, one would want to know --exactly-- who (and what) one is getting involved with, right?

At the same time, I would hope that if someone is seriously dating someone+marriage is in the cards ((I'm thinking mostly of Christians here)), then at that point one would have a good idea of the other person's background, financial status, spending habits, etc.

Do intensive credit checks require a signed consent form from the person you're doing the check on? Or can one just go to a website, pay some $$$, and get the information?
I think if someone was in an open and honest relationship with a woman and considering this credit check, they'd commit to getting their own credit check, background check first. And then when they felt it was time, give that to their lady. See how she responds and ask her if they can reciprocate with her credit and background.
The response from her should tell it all.

If it is done in secret on the man's part, he's a sneak. And that bodes ill for any relationship going forward. IMO of course.
editing to add: How's a man going to do a credit check on his woman unless he's somehow obtained her SSN?
 
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Most of the responses above parrot what people said on Facebook when I asked the same question.

How someone manages money tells you a lot about them. I'd NEVER get involved with someone without trading credit histories, and I'd expect her to have the same attitude.
 
I think if someone was in an open and honest relationship with a woman and considering this credit check, they'd commit to getting their own credit check, background check first. And then when they felt it was time, give that to their lady. See how she responds and ask her if they can reciprocate with her credit and background.
The response from her should tell it all.

EXACTLY!
 
Ha! Until you find your credit card maxed out and your mortgage behind to the poi t of foreclosure. But boy does she look hot in that dress Lol!

Just kidding brother lol!

Oh, I did. She maxed out the cards before she left and left me 8 grand of debt. I paid it off pretty quickly. That's sorta...what girls do. A man's gotta make enough money to keep up with them, lol.
 
I think if someone was in an open and honest relationship with a woman and considering this credit check, they'd commit to getting their own credit check, background check first. And then when they felt it was time, give that to their lady. See how she responds and ask her if they can reciprocate with her credit and background.
The response from her should tell it all.

If it is done in secret on the man's part, he's a sneak. And that bodes ill for any relationship going forward. IMO of course.
editing to add: How's a man going to do a credit check on his woman unless he's somehow obtained her SSN?

Details, details...lol. I remember jokin with my buddies before, that may as well put a financial statement together to give to her when she gives you her phone number. She'll know before the first date if she wants a second date. :hysterical

It'll show you what she's made of like you said.
 
Years ago I was talking with a co-worker about something similar. She said the best way to get a man to open up is talk about his work. I said you want him to talk about his work to see if he can afford you......she did not think that was funny.......
 
Details, details...lol. I remember jokin with my buddies before, that may as well put a financial statement together to give to her when she gives you her phone number. She'll know before the first date if she wants a second date. :hysterical

It'll show you what she's made of like you said.
:lol

Someone said something like, it's only money. That is easy to say when they have money. But when someone up and leaves the joint bank account empty, maxed out the joint CC's, it's only a matter of time before the one that said, it's only money, bounces off their own walls screaming, how did I not see this coming?
:whirl
 
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