Has it really been over a year since I've been here?!

[Nikki]

I was lying in bed thinking about how quickly things are changing in my life, I suddenly thought of this forum. So much has happened since I've last been here.

My daughters are now 16 and 14 1/2. This school year has been so busy that I spend 90% of my time one of their schools or in my car. Both girls were on the cheer team, so from August until about 5 weeks ago, I never had a spare moment. I was finally getting a bit of a break when my 16 year old decided she wanted to join track. She's ended up being REALLY good at it and loves it, so now I'm spending time at her school for that too. She has only been practicing for 2 weeks, had her first meet last week and made 2nd place. She's 17th out of over 100 sophomores in the state in pole vaulting. She's never pole vaulted in her life before 2 weeks ago.

Anyways, she also got her first job at a restaurant in town, got her license and is "seeing" a boy. He's a really nice, old fashioned boy and he too is busy, so they don't really get to see much of each other outside of school. They've been hanging out for about 2 months now and are mainly just building their friendship. My daughter seemed frustrated at one point that he hasn't tried kissing her, but I pointed out that he's respectful, mature, and a good Christian boy. I had a very hard time when she began talking about him and when he came over the first couple of times, but I've really grown to like him and even though she's only 16 and it probably won't last, I must admit that he's everything a mother would want for their daughter. With that being said, I'm sure it won't last. lol

My 14 year old is now in drivers ed classes (they end Tuesday) and will be doing her in-car test this summer. That just seems crazy to me.

I have landed an AMAZING job. I only work a few hours each day, I have an awesome supervisor and a GREAT group of ladies that I work with. I sat here yesterday scrolling through Facebook and was just overwhelmed with the amount of blessings that I have in my life.

One hardship that we are facing though is my dad. He was recently diagnosed with dementia. He's only 65 and the other day he couldn't even remember his address. It seems to be progressing fast despite the fact that he is on medication for it. I've had many, many years of anger towards him over a few things that happened in the past, but now that I'm watching him slowly deteriorate, the anger is melting away. It's time to forgive and move on. Please keep my family in your prayers regarding him. My mom isn't handling it well....meaning that I don't think she has the patience to be his caretaker when it gets to that point.

Now I'm going to scroll through posts and see what the rest of you have been up to. Thank you for all of your support over the years.

 

[reba]

Hi Nikkie Teenage daughters are fun

 

[Nikki]

Hi Nikkie Teenage daughters are fun

Fun....if that's what you want to call it. Today was one of those days when I told my 16 year old "It's a good thing you have to work today" because I had about had it with her moodiness. :angry

 

[AirDancer]

It's wonderful to hear from you again, Nikki ! It's been toooooo long!

Kids have such a tendency (thankfully!) to grow up. Sixteen, with a part time job, involved with sports, cheerleading ... wow! And fourteen, preparing for a drivers license (scary!). You certainly haven't had a moment's rest for a while.

Am saddened to learn about your Dad. You are all in my prayers. And I give you a lot of credit for your strength as you raise teenagers! Our Lord is amazing at what He arms us with

 

[Nikki]

It's wonderful to hear from you again, Nikki ! It's been toooooo long!

Kids have such a tendency (thankfully!) to grow up. Sixteen, with a part time job, involved with sports, cheerleading ... wow! And fourteen, preparing for a drivers license (scary!). You certainly haven't had a moment's rest for a while.

Am saddened to learn about your Dad. You are all in my prayers. And I give you a lot of credit for your strength as you raise teenagers! Our Lord is amazing at what He arms us with

Thank you! I have pictures of my girls in my room at work and whenever a patient asks about them, I always tell them "I have 2 teenage girls. If you're a Christian, please pray for me because I need all the help I can get". lol

I've had quite a few parents say negative things to me regarding my 16 year old working. She is not the most mature female and working has been the best thing we could have done for her. Plus, I am seeing more and more teenagers that have no social skills whatsoever. They NEED to be put out in the real world. They NEED to learn the value of a dollar. It took my daughter about 2 weeks to understand how expensive life is. Her insurance payment alone doesn't leave her with much left over once she puts gas in her car. To each their own, but this is our rule. If they want the luxury of driving, then they have to be able to afford it. Since taking on all of these responsibilities, she made honor roll for the first time in her life. It's also good for she and I because honestly, we do NOT get along well. We are too much alike and it's a constant battle. I remember not liking my mom as a teen, but once I was married with kids of my own, she was my best friend. So I can only hope and pray that the same thing happens with me and my oldest.

 

[jasonc]

Thank you! I have pictures of my girls in my room at work and whenever a patient asks about them, I always tell them "I have 2 teenage girls. If you're a Christian, please pray for me because I need all the help I can get". lol

I've had quite a few parents say negative things to me regarding my 16 year old working. She is not the most mature female and working has been the best thing we could have done for her. Plus, I am seeing more and more teenagers that have no social skills whatsoever. They NEED to be put out in the real world. They NEED to learn the value of a dollar. It took my daughter about 2 weeks to understand how expensive life is. Her insurance payment alone doesn't leave her with much left over once she puts gas in her car. To each their own, but this is our rule. If they want the luxury of driving, then they have to be able to afford it. Since taking on all of these responsibilities, she made honor roll for the first time in her life. It's also good for she and I because honestly, we do NOT get along well. We are too much alike and it's a constant battle. I remember not liking my mom as a teen, but once I was married with kids of my own, she was my best friend. So I can only hope and pray that the same thing happens with me and my oldest.

monica and my wife.

 

[AirDancer]

The rule in my household when my kids were growing up: they each could get their drivers license after successfully completing the course at their high school. But in order to drive a car (which we provided for their use), they had to pay for their own insurance. Which of course meant a part time job. They had to keep their grades up in order to have the part time job. And they had to stay on the straight & narrow. Fortunately, my kids each took the rules to heart, kept up their grades so they could keep their part time jobs in order to pay car insurance, gas, etc.

However, on one occasion, when speaking with one of the school counselors (about university goals for my oldest offspring), I was informed that my offspring, having a part time job, could be considered a form of child abuse, because a student's only obligation is to attend school. I politely told the counselor that anyone who believed educating a teen beyond the school setting was a form of child abuse, well, whoever thought that was was downright crazy in the head & should have serious counseling.

Needless to say, my offspring were trained early to properly handle money and to take care of bills in timely fashion. They also learned much about the real world by having part time jobs. And they were each prepared to handle life, living away from home, while attending university. My kids stood on their own two feet during university years while some of their classmates went wild with their 'freedoms.'

Teenage kids having part time jobs? I'm quite in favor of it!

 

[jasonc]

The rule in my household when my kids were growing up: they each could get their drivers license after successfully completing the course at their high school. But in order to drive a car (which we provided for their use), they had to pay for their own insurance. Which of course meant a part time job. They had to keep their grades up in order to have the part time job. And they had to stay on the straight & narrow. Fortunately, my kids each took the rules to heart, kept up their grades so they could keep their part time jobs in order to pay car insurance, gas, etc.

However, on one occasion, when speaking with one of the school counselors (about university goals for my oldest offspring), I was informed that my offspring, having a part time job, could be considered a form of child abuse, because a student's only obligation is to attend school. I politely told the counselor that anyone who believed educating a teen beyond the school setting was a form of child abuse, well, whoever thought that was was downright crazy in the head & should have serious counseling.

Needless to say, my offspring were trained early to properly handle money and to take care of bills in timely fashion. They also learned much about the real world by having part time jobs. And they were each prepared to handle life, living away from home, while attending university. My kids stood on their own two feet during university years while some of their classmates went wild with their 'freedoms.'

Teenage kids having part time jobs? I'm quite in favor of it!

I told Nathan that. he will learn to drive and on his own get a car while working.

 

[AirDancer]

I support your decision to help Nathan to take responsibility and to mature in that way, jasonc.

So many of my kids' friends were handed everything without any consideration to the responsibilities they needed to learn. At that time, I could have very easily bought them each a new car and covered all expenses. But I didn't believe that was the proper way to help them to stand on their own responsibly.

 

[jasonc]

monica nor I can afford a car for him. I cant. I believe my ranger will be totaled and well I looked online for cars.its not looking good. either I will settle for an old used car that is in need of work or go into debt. god will work this out. I also know monica needs a new car for herself. Nathan will have to save and buy his first car and also work on some of the insurance. and then I told him good luck having the freedom of driving everywhere and doing what you want. he is like man that sucks, yup welcome to adulthood. I told him that last year.

 

[AirDancer]

Oh, yes, that ever-pleasant welcome to adulthood! Kids really and truly do not know just how great they have it when they're young!

 

[handy]

Wha? Y'all mean the "magic adult fairies" are not going to come and bestow upon your teens a brand spanking new Ford Mustang, annual insurance premiums paid for and unlimited gasoline?

lol.... Yeah... they aren't coming for my kids either.

Nikki, I didn't realize how close our kids are in age. Viola is 16 1/2 and Thomas just turned 14. They are both learning how to drive as well. They do have a car because my mom decided not to drive any longer and gave them her '98 Ford Explorer. They still need to get their licenses and earn the money for their insurance and gas.

 

[Nikki]

Kailey only works 1-2 days a week (usually Saturday mornings and Sunday afternoons). It's GREAT because she is paying her own insurance and gas, but also because like yesterday for instance, we were shopping for shoes and she wanted yet ANOTHER pair of workout pants and she didn't even bother asking me if I would buy them for her. She looked for a pair on the clearance rack and bought them herself.

 

[Nikki]

monica nor I can afford a car for him. I cant. I believe my ranger will be totaled and well I looked online for cars.its not looking good. either I will settle for an old used car that is in need of work or go into debt. god will work this out. I also know monica needs a new car for herself. Nathan will have to save and buy his first car and also work on some of the insurance. and then I told him good luck having the freedom of driving everywhere and doing what you want. he is like man that sucks, yup welcome to adulthood. I told him that last year.

It takes no time at all for them to learn the value of a dollar. When we told my daughter her insurance was due and we were taking the money out of her account, she deducted the insurance and gas and said "I'm only going to have a few dollars left!". Welcome to LIFE honey. lol