How to deal with people who don't give you respect?

[Brock]

How do you deal with people who don't give you respect? Specifically people close to you like family members.

 

[Tessa]

Hi Brock. I used to have a big problem with an aunt. She was always putting me down and trying to cause trouble in the family. I disliked her so much I was afraid it was going to turn to hatred. Then I remembered love thine enemies. I started praying for her and immediately my feelings changed. It didn't matter to me any more. Hate the sin not the sinner. I felt a lot better

 

[Chopper]

How do you deal with people who don't give you respect? Specifically people close to you like family members.

Hello Brock. This problem of yours is a common "family" problem that many have. Most of the time it is brought on by people who are jealous of you in some way. There is something about you that sets people off in disrespecting you. You need to have an honest conversation with your Abba Father Who knows all things, and ask Him to help you. Talk to Him like you would with your best friend who you can trust and you know that He loves you and wants the best for you.

Mat 5:43 Ye have heard that it hath been said, Thou shalt love thy neighbour, and hate thine enemy.
Mat 5:44 But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you;
Mat 5:45 That ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven:

This is a great portion of Scripture right from the lips of your Savior Jesus Christ. This is so powerful that when you use it, it'll change your situation. If you're serious, and keep up this advise/command from Jesus, it will work!! I'm a witness to this.

Love You,
Chopper

 

[Brock]

Hello Brock. This problem of yours is a common "family" problem that many have. Most of the time it is brought on by people who are jealous of you in some way. There is something about you that sets people off in disrespecting you. You need to have an honest conversation with your Abba Father Who knows all things, and ask Him to help you. Talk to Him like you would with your best friend who you can trust and you know that He loves you and wants the best for you.

Mat 5:43 Ye have heard that it hath been said, Thou shalt love thy neighbour, and hate thine enemy.
Mat 5:44 But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you;
Mat 5:45 That ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven:

This is a great portion of Scripture right from the lips of your Savior Jesus Christ. This is so powerful that when you use it, it'll change your situation. If you're serious, and keep up this advise/command from Jesus, it will work!! I'm a witness to this.

Love You,
Chopper

Hey, whats up chopper I haven't seen you in a while.

 

[WIP]

How do you deal with people who don't give you respect? Specifically people close to you like family members.

If I recall, it was you that wrote in another thread that respect is earned. Remember what I said? I said that philosophy is a dead-end street because it would be impossible to earn respect when everyone has to wait for others to act. I also said the appropriate way is to give others the utmost of respect first because disrespect is what is earned.

Maybe you're experiencing precisely what I'm talking about.

 

[evenifigoalone]

I have a family member I don't get along with and I'm not sure it's resolvable. I try to be nice to them as far as I'm able (try, I slip up at times), and honestly I kind of avoid them in other cases.
Sometimes you can change people by being patient and understanding with them, but ultimately only they can change themselves.

 

[Honey]

How do you deal with people who don't give you respect? Specifically people close to you like family members.

I would ask if I could speak with them privately and arrange a day. Then I'd ask them why they treat me the way they do.
Family sometimes think because of the blood relation they can do anything and it's permissible because it's family. That's not the case. Especially when how they behave toward you hurts you.
If they're not amenable to that solution then I'd say there are two options. One, kill 'em with kindness. As in , when you must deal with them be totally sweet. Otherwise, ignore them.
If they put you down and especially in front of other family members, remember, that reflects badly on them. Not on you. They're treating you like that. And in front of others who witness the behavior that others are well aware could turn on them. In that case, what really bugs someone that does that is if you smile the whole time. Tilt your head a little as if you're showing patience to a petulant child and say nothing.
When they finish their little display, turn to the others who were watching and still say nothing. Just smile.

I had a total stranger cut in front of me in a store line. No words, she just got in front of me. So I said, well , by all means. And smiled.
Whoooo, boy what a trigger. This woman goes off . "By all means!" And repeats that a few times. Then she says, look at you sounding stupid. What's by all means mean? To which I , still smiling , responded, God bless you.
Yeah, that's the ticket. She repeats that a few times. Then asks, what's that mean. And I said, It means dear that you need Jesus.
Then she kept going off on that. Ending with, look at you. Looking stupid out of your face, (I have yet to know what that means), telling me I need Jesus. Making a scene!
To which I responded as I always did with a very calm voice and still smiling, I'm not the one going off in line after cutting in front of everyone dear. The scene is all yours. God Bless.
She shut up.
The cashier when I got to her for check out apologized on behalf of that rude customer. I told her, it was OK. Some people just have really bad days and need to vent.

That could be the way it is with your relation that's always cutting you down. Or, they could be jealous.
Either way, you don't have to take it. Choose your battles and what you'll tolerate. Some people act like that because no one has ever said something in order to let them know it is unacceptable. And while rude mean behavior should be a given as unacceptable, especially when it is family, some people don't think that way. They're mad, hurting, ill, whatever it is, and they just vent.

I wish you every blessing as you go forward.

 

[HeIsRisen2018]

Hmmm... how do I handle it when people don't show me the respect that I deserve? Interesting question... well, for starters since it happened to me tonight with a certain individual that I will not name, I ignore them publically, cuss them out privately, and then I take a deep breath and ask the Lord to forgive me and help me control my anger. Because I know that even when they drive me completely INSANE that I still have to love them as God has commanded me to do and pray for them as well. Listen Brock, there are times when we all want to yell at the top of our lungs and pull our hair out, like I mentioned before on my own thread. Anger in itself is not a sin since even Jesus was able to feel anger. It's what we decide to do with it that counts. You just hang in there.

 

[reba]

closed

 

[reba]

if you are being abused report it... not here but when you can have real help