M
mues747
Guest
To make this as brief as possible and share the Glory of the Lord's mercy to the fullest...
To start with my Dad.. He is man of all the same flaws and faults as the rest of us... leading up to my birth, he had an alcohol problem... He also found out that he had cancer... Taking treatments, getting only worse, one day he went to the hospital, and while in the waiting room saw a new testament sitting there... He picked it up and began to read the gospel... At this point in his life he was broken, approaching death or the possibility of it, riddled with guilt for his sins, without hope or christ... While reading, he felt the Holy Spirit testify to him of the truth of Gospel... God gave him the gift of faith in the testimony of salvation through christ, and he believed, he found hope and assurance then and there... Weeks following he was still approaching death, but with his hope in christ he continued to confess to his family his past wrongs, clearing his conscience before them in humility for his past... Then one night, while in bed, sick and weak, he prayed, "if it is your will Lord, heal me...never the less, your will be done"... In that night he found himself in a vision, within the glory of God, His Spirit a consuming fire (of love and righteousness)... Within that vision he was filled with God's love, and that being the truth of christ and God's love toward us through Him... He awoke suddenly afterward, cleansed of cancer entirely... I being not yet a year old, in my crib, was crying and cooing, and my dad held me, crying and rejoicing in God's mercy and love...
Onto me now... I being raised by this man, my dad whom knew God's mercy and love, had many seeming contradictions to live with... My dad grew pot... Society condemning such... I felt alienation from the world, from those at school... I knew what my dad grew was illegal, and it was a secret... I know that right now, whomever is reading may condemn him as well... A born again believer growing pot? But that is what i said was a difficulty for me growing up, a seeming contradiction... And this story is not about whether he is guilty, for he is a child of God, under God's grace and eternally secure in his salvation... God is his judge and savior, not I or any man... What I can say is that it was difficult growing up, and it did not help me to live a "good life", but caused shame and guilt... And as years went on, I myself began smoking pot, behind my dad's back... I kept on for years through my teens, and ended up using meth also... As those years went on, I began loosing my mind to the meth... I ended up having a psychotic episode in 1996, committing a felony (aggrivated battery), and sentenced to prison for 10 years... As I spent time in the prison system, those years brought some healing to my meth ravaged mind, allowing me to function again, not hear voices or see hallucinations... I sought out spirituality, read many books on it, including the bible... It was not until 5 years into my 10 year sentence that I was saved... Previously, during my first 5 years I had prayed the sinner's prayer, yet nothing changed... I must have prayed that prayer several times during those years... But there was no conversion, no rebirth... It was in 2002 that I found myself in a prison revival (prison ministry, 3 days), I attended the last day... Then and there I found that the Gospel was being laid upon my heart, my ears heard, my eyes opened and I saw... The Holy Spirit spoke to me through that preacher, and God gave me the gift of saving faith, to believe the witness of His Son... I remember it so well, the moment I believed, the tears of joy, the lifting of my soul out of the depths of guilt for sin, being given a new Spirit, being made a new creature in christ... I was born again! The truth of christ being born in me, a new life of hope, peace and love pouring through me... I must have cried for days with joy, lying upon my prison bunk, reading the bible... The words of God being so new and fresh and real, I fed from His word hour upon hour rejoicing in His love... I still feel so awe struck at His goodness, His love, all in remembrance of this... I love the Lord, will live for the Lord, my savior and true Father all of my days...
To start with my Dad.. He is man of all the same flaws and faults as the rest of us... leading up to my birth, he had an alcohol problem... He also found out that he had cancer... Taking treatments, getting only worse, one day he went to the hospital, and while in the waiting room saw a new testament sitting there... He picked it up and began to read the gospel... At this point in his life he was broken, approaching death or the possibility of it, riddled with guilt for his sins, without hope or christ... While reading, he felt the Holy Spirit testify to him of the truth of Gospel... God gave him the gift of faith in the testimony of salvation through christ, and he believed, he found hope and assurance then and there... Weeks following he was still approaching death, but with his hope in christ he continued to confess to his family his past wrongs, clearing his conscience before them in humility for his past... Then one night, while in bed, sick and weak, he prayed, "if it is your will Lord, heal me...never the less, your will be done"... In that night he found himself in a vision, within the glory of God, His Spirit a consuming fire (of love and righteousness)... Within that vision he was filled with God's love, and that being the truth of christ and God's love toward us through Him... He awoke suddenly afterward, cleansed of cancer entirely... I being not yet a year old, in my crib, was crying and cooing, and my dad held me, crying and rejoicing in God's mercy and love...
Onto me now... I being raised by this man, my dad whom knew God's mercy and love, had many seeming contradictions to live with... My dad grew pot... Society condemning such... I felt alienation from the world, from those at school... I knew what my dad grew was illegal, and it was a secret... I know that right now, whomever is reading may condemn him as well... A born again believer growing pot? But that is what i said was a difficulty for me growing up, a seeming contradiction... And this story is not about whether he is guilty, for he is a child of God, under God's grace and eternally secure in his salvation... God is his judge and savior, not I or any man... What I can say is that it was difficult growing up, and it did not help me to live a "good life", but caused shame and guilt... And as years went on, I myself began smoking pot, behind my dad's back... I kept on for years through my teens, and ended up using meth also... As those years went on, I began loosing my mind to the meth... I ended up having a psychotic episode in 1996, committing a felony (aggrivated battery), and sentenced to prison for 10 years... As I spent time in the prison system, those years brought some healing to my meth ravaged mind, allowing me to function again, not hear voices or see hallucinations... I sought out spirituality, read many books on it, including the bible... It was not until 5 years into my 10 year sentence that I was saved... Previously, during my first 5 years I had prayed the sinner's prayer, yet nothing changed... I must have prayed that prayer several times during those years... But there was no conversion, no rebirth... It was in 2002 that I found myself in a prison revival (prison ministry, 3 days), I attended the last day... Then and there I found that the Gospel was being laid upon my heart, my ears heard, my eyes opened and I saw... The Holy Spirit spoke to me through that preacher, and God gave me the gift of saving faith, to believe the witness of His Son... I remember it so well, the moment I believed, the tears of joy, the lifting of my soul out of the depths of guilt for sin, being given a new Spirit, being made a new creature in christ... I was born again! The truth of christ being born in me, a new life of hope, peace and love pouring through me... I must have cried for days with joy, lying upon my prison bunk, reading the bible... The words of God being so new and fresh and real, I fed from His word hour upon hour rejoicing in His love... I still feel so awe struck at His goodness, His love, all in remembrance of this... I love the Lord, will live for the Lord, my savior and true Father all of my days...
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L'Chante said it better than I could. 
