Jesusfreak97
Member
Hey pplz! I am writing a story where the main charicter (Erin) looses her twin brother (Shane) to cancer. Her dad has severe depression and it's really hard for her to cope with loosing her brother and her dad. All these years she's had Shane to help her deal with her dad's depression but now that he's gone she feels helpless and angry at God. As a way to cope witht the loss of her brother's death she goes to partying and drinking and dabbles in drugs a little. Her mother (who is a Christian) does not approve of this and they have a falling out so Erin moves to Ohio where she meets her boyfriend Todd who is an alcoholic. It picks up on the one year anniversary of her brothers death and some weird things start happening. While she is at Panera she gets a blue flyer for Golden Gate Art museum. She goes to the museum three times over the course of the story and each time she is confromnted with a statue that comes to life. The statue that comes to life turns in to "God". I put that in "" because what Erin is seeing is not really God when the statues come to life, rather an illusion by satan (who runs this museum) showing her what God is not, like a God who is angry and condemns her for all her sins rather than a forgiving God who loves her.
She sees three of these statues and right before the last one she gives up her virginity to her boyfriend Todd after getting drunk at a bar with him. She had done, drugs, drinking, and everything else except that because she had made a purtiy promise in highschool with her youth group and at the time she made the promise for God but as time went on she thought it was for shane (because they signed they're certificates together). Erin realizes she made a mistake and runs out the door and then she tries to think back to where this all started. She thinks back to the Museum and goes marching back there and confronts the manager (satan "bill") he just laughs at her and as she runs out she is drawn to the last sattue which is just an empty podium which reperesents the abasence of God. Satan tries to tell us sometimes that He isn't there and that is why I put in the empty podium. She gets transferreed to the little world, feels extreeme lonlieness and pain, then she finds herself back in the museum and runs out upset.
She ends up going to a starbucks where she meets the real Jesus in human form. I portrayed him as a middle eastern man who looked ordinary. Anyway she runs in to Jesus and they talk and he doesn't come out and say "I am Jesus" rather he just talks to her and they just ease in to a conversation about everything that happened he invites her to go back to him. She invites him back in to her life and she calls her mom and it's a happy ending. The last thing people will read is Todd calling her and her sending a prayer up to God and then her answering the phone.
The end
Sorry that was so long and that was just the overwiew. Any way if anyone has any cool ideas, or comments, or even if you think this is an awful story please share. I am open to anything. I know that this isn't the full story but it's as close as I can get to posting it on here (plus I am still editing) so please comment. Also if anyone can give me any good ideas on a physical description of Bill (who is satan) please help me out here. And do you think I should give the dad depression or not? I'm still unsure of that. So yeah anything else PLEASE TELL ME!
She sees three of these statues and right before the last one she gives up her virginity to her boyfriend Todd after getting drunk at a bar with him. She had done, drugs, drinking, and everything else except that because she had made a purtiy promise in highschool with her youth group and at the time she made the promise for God but as time went on she thought it was for shane (because they signed they're certificates together). Erin realizes she made a mistake and runs out the door and then she tries to think back to where this all started. She thinks back to the Museum and goes marching back there and confronts the manager (satan "bill") he just laughs at her and as she runs out she is drawn to the last sattue which is just an empty podium which reperesents the abasence of God. Satan tries to tell us sometimes that He isn't there and that is why I put in the empty podium. She gets transferreed to the little world, feels extreeme lonlieness and pain, then she finds herself back in the museum and runs out upset.
She ends up going to a starbucks where she meets the real Jesus in human form. I portrayed him as a middle eastern man who looked ordinary. Anyway she runs in to Jesus and they talk and he doesn't come out and say "I am Jesus" rather he just talks to her and they just ease in to a conversation about everything that happened he invites her to go back to him. She invites him back in to her life and she calls her mom and it's a happy ending. The last thing people will read is Todd calling her and her sending a prayer up to God and then her answering the phone.
The end
Sorry that was so long and that was just the overwiew. Any way if anyone has any cool ideas, or comments, or even if you think this is an awful story please share. I am open to anything. I know that this isn't the full story but it's as close as I can get to posting it on here (plus I am still editing) so please comment. Also if anyone can give me any good ideas on a physical description of Bill (who is satan) please help me out here. And do you think I should give the dad depression or not? I'm still unsure of that. So yeah anything else PLEASE TELL ME!
ed!
but...uh...what? 
