Hey All,
Let's think about your points of concern QuestionGuy.
You are starting to mature in your faith. The euphoria is giving way.
2 Corinthians 5:7 (For we walk by faith, not by sight
We do not have to feel God, to know He is there. I will say this; you should have a lasting joy in your heart. That doesn't mean we walk around with a stupid grin on our faces. It means that no matter what happens, wherever we go, however bad we screw things up, God loves us. We can never lose God's love. That should bring a quiet comfort and joy to our hearts. If you are missing your joy, that is an indicator that you have unresolved sin in your life.
How do you fix it?
Ask for forgiveness, make amends where possible, find that straight and narrow way, put on the full armor of God, and keep walking.
Now to your concerns:
"1) I was starting to turn away from violent and sexual imagery (TV, movies, games). But then I watched religious videos where people said that those things didn't matter as long as you don't cause your brother to stumble (or fall, or something like that). So I fell back into watching that sort of stuff." Quote from QuestionGuy
You are listening to foolish people. Anybody that tells you sin doesn't matter, is automatically wrong. That sin is causing you to stumble. It is also causing your numbness. Turn away again, and this time, don't let anyone tell you sin doesn't matter. Ask for forgiveness. Pray for strength, each day, to keep you from turning back. Each night, before you sleep, thank God for keeping you from this sin. Make yourself accountable to God every day. It will change your attitude if you know you have to come to God each day and give an account. You may find that you are sinning less, because your love for God supercedes your love for sin.
"2) I have always been someone who wanted to do good deeds just for the sake of it. But then the Bible says that our righteous acts are like filthy rags. So that kinda killed the buzz for me too. What makes it even more confusing is that people say that when your relationship with God strengthens, you'll be compelled to do good deeds. But we're told they're like filthy rags." Quote from QuestionGuy
2 Corinthians 4:6-7 For God, who commanded the light to shine out of darkness, hath shined in our hearts, to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ.
But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellency of the power may be of God, and not of us.
God uses my imperfection, my darkness. God's light shines in our hearts and, if we are walking the walk, gives light and knowledge of God's glory. Our imperfection shows the power is God's, and not ours. That's pretty cool! God left me the way I am, a sinner saved by grace through faith in Jesus, so He can shine through my sin, my imperfection, my "filthy rags."
So don't let what you are be an excuse to not help others. In fact, you want to restore your joy. Give the hungry something to eat. Give a hand to someone in need. This can be the making amends part of repentance. If you are doing this, you will reduce the idle time on your hands and thereby reduce the sin in your life.
1 John 1:9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
It means your "filthy rags" have been washed clean. This is how God sees you. This is what allows you to do the will of God.
Try it.
"3) For the past week or so I had been feeling so anxious about whether I would make it into heaven or not. It was all I could think about. It consumed most of my thoughts. I even watched several videos about assurance. But then I watched a video from someone who gives prophetic messages. He said that God wants us to stop overthinking things. This resonated with me because I am a huge overthinker. It seems to have worked because I'm not longer freaking out. But now I worry that I'm too numb. Now I'm worried that I've sorta "turned off my heart". Is this a bad sign?" Quote from QuestionGuy
You found someone who told you what you want to hear. Quit turning to people who tell you "you are OK" when you know know what they are saying is wrong. They just want your money. They don't care about how you feel. And now you feel numb.
Are you surprised?
If you are a believer, then you don't need to worry about the security of your salvation.
John 10:27-30 My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me:
And I give unto them eternal life; and they shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them out of my hand.
My Father, which gave them me, is greater than all; and no man is able to pluck them out of my Father's hand.
I and my Father are one.
Nobody can take you away from Jesus. His voice is reflected in Scripture. Read it every day , even if it only a verse or two. As you do you will start to understand what it says. Keep a dictionary close by to look up words you don't understand; or just Google the word followed by define.
Finally, you have to walk your walk.
Nobody can do it for you.
Psalms 3:3 But thou, O LORD, art a shield for me; my glory, and the lifter up of mine head.
Matthew 7:14
Because strait is the gate, and narrow is the way, which leadeth unto life, and few there be that find it.
Ephesians 6:13 Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.
Psalms 23:4 Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.
Resolve the sin that creates your numbness.
God will lift your head.
Find that straight and narrow way.
Put on the full armor of God.
Walk.
Now, you want the secret to doing this?
To accomplish this, we have to love God with every fiber of our being, and love others as much as we love ourselves.
Luke 10:27
And he answering said, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy strength, and with all thy mind; and thy neighbour as thyself.
Don't quit. Don't give up.
Keep walking everybody.
May God bless,
Taz