Need advice: Crazy Step Mother

[Nickthrowaway]

This is a throwaway because this is a somewhat embarrassing situation lol

Backstory: I got laid off recently, so I moved back home with my dad and moved back into my room with stipulations, (pay rent buy food etc.) I know it isnt ideal for someone my age (25) but its all I can afford right now. I do not have anywhere else to go. Before I grew up mainly with just my dad and I. This time however he remarried and there have been some issues with my step mother.

At first she was incredibly nice and my dad seemed happy so I didnt mind living with her however after a month I feel like I am 14 again living under her strict house rules. It started out small like requiring certain types of toothpaste, lights out by midnight etc. but over time it got way overbearing. She walks in my room unannounced because "she is the owner of the house" regardless of the time of day, and just overall invades my privacy. I know she means well and is just trying to be helpful but recently she started doing my laundry, which is no big deal (I appreciate it lol), but she saw my boxers were all old so she called me when she was at walmart a few weeks ago to see if I wanted her to get me some replacements. I told her no but she started going on about the state of my undies so I just caved not wanted to get in an argument with her. I was originally very appreciative of this until I got home later that day and after a shower I saw my entire drawer was empty of my previous underwear, only to be replaced by at least 10 pairs of white tighty whities. She insists I wear these undies as boxers are "bad" for you. My dad dosent understand my issue (he wears tighty whities as well) and just said I should be greatful I had a place to crash and that my step mother made a good point about the support. I understand what they are saying, but I am not a teenager anymore and can buy my own underwear. It isn't even as much about the the fact they are tighty whities, it took me about a week to stop being embarrassed about wearing them again but when everyone in the house is already aware and has seen me in them its not that big of a deal. I can continue wearing them. its about the fact I am not allowed to have other types seems overbearing.

I respect my fathers wishes while I live in the house, but I want to talk to them to tell them how its starting to become overbearing. How do I even start that conversation?

 

[Anaphora]

Tough question my friend. My advice. I wouldn't rock the boat. Secretly hide boxers shorts. Make it look like your complying with tight white underwear. Go around them. Don't force confrontation. I know, its pain in the butt. I agree. Find away to go around them, without risking confrontation. Meantime. Find good paying job. Steady job. My opinion. Apply for bus driver job. They will train you and give you class B license. Work one year to gain experience. Apply for city bus driver job. Pays $$ 24 hour. Save money up. Move out !!. Peace.

 

[Who Me]

want to talk to them to tell them

What do you want to talk to them about?
How do you want to talk to them?

May I suggest you ask for an appointment to talk with both of them.
Start by acknowledging it is there home and how grateful you are to be able to live there.
While it is there house you have a right to privacy and are asking to be shown respect by there being a knock on your bedroom door and waiting for a ' come in '.
Tell them you are very happy to pay rent etc, to do chores and to do your own laundry.

You might want to discuss the issue of underwear, I wouldn't.
Just be working hard to get a job that will enable you to get your own place.
While looking for that take anything that enables you to be earning and out of the house, let them see you are actively working and searching.