Physical Abuse

[jorel7am]

Touching can be physical abuse. It depends on how you touch somebody! If it's an unwanted touch, or a brutal touch, it will leave their emotional scars. But lack of touching can be also physical abuse. People and animals need a caring touch! Isn't this actually the reason why God created us? To love and to be loved, to touch ...and to be touched. That's how we became close friends... HE touched me! - Jorel d'Aguilar http://www.thelandaftertime.com

 

[SputnikBoy]

Touching can be physical abuse. But lack of touching it is also physical abuse. Isn't this actually the reason why God created us? To love, to touch ...and to be touched. That's how we became close friends... HE touched me! - Jorel d'Aguilar http://www.thelandaftertime.com

Sputnik: With the advent of pop-psychology there has developed so much paranoia within society. The majority of people are incapable of thinking beyond what the 'experts' implant into their brains. Is it not true that the clinics of psychologists/psychiatrists in the U.S. are close to bulging at the seams? I believe that many aspects of psychology are (or can be) pure evil. And yet, so many embrace it nowadays with open arms. 'Touching' being equated to physical abuse is one of those concepts that was spawned from psychology. Sad.

 

[Nostalgic Dawn]

Agreed. Especially concerning guys touching younger kids. Women my age (21) can give young boys kisses on the cheek and no one will glance twice, but if a man my age does the same, it's a lawsuit waiting to happen. Way sad I have guy friends who adore kids so much, but abstain from hugging/kissing their young friends because of societial views.

 

[SputnikBoy]

Agreed. Especially concerning guys touching younger kids. Women my age (21) can give young boys kisses on the cheek and no one will glance twice, but if a man my age does the same, it's a lawsuit waiting to happen. Way sad I have guy friends who adore kids so much, but abstain from hugging/kissing their young friends because of societial views.

Sputnik: Maybe it's time for us to reclaim our innate rights ...? Anyway, having said that, I just want to mention that I AM currently studying psychology in order to finish up a Batchelor of Community Welfare degree. And, while interesting, some of the concepts of psychology DO bother me somewhat. There doesn't seem to be much place for Jesus in the discipline, particularly in regard to the humanistic viewpoint. It isn't only the subject of psychology that may be 'iffy'. In fact, it's more so the 'book educated' academics that are let loose into society with a university degree who become crusaders of 'causes' that are often of their own making.

 

[Klee shay]

I think it's best to use discretion and only touch those who have your permission to - children or otherwise.

My daughter is becoming an independent 2 year old and I only hug her when she wants to be hugged. There are lines we should encourage our children to use. Permission is always something we should encourage them to give in regards to anyone touching them.

Sexual preditors do prey on the innocent; and unfortunately they are present in our society.

Touch by all means, so long as it is wanted by the person being touched. Even Christ did not force himself upon those who did not want to know him.

 

[SputnikBoy]

I think it's best to use discretion and only touch those who have your permission to - children or otherwise.

My daughter is becoming an independent 2 year old and I only hug her when she wants to be hugged. There are lines we should encourage our children to use. Permission is always something we should encourage them to give in regards to anyone touching them.

Sputnik: No room for a spontaneous hug of encouragement?

Klee shay: Sexual preditors do prey on the innocent; and unfortunately they are present in our society.

Sputnik: Yes, and they always will be. Caution is one thing, media-induced paranoia is another. Life can be a risky business but most of us seem to get through it pretty well unscathed.

Klee shay: Touch by all means, so long as it is wanted by the person being touched. Even Christ did not force himself upon those who did not want to know him.

Sputnik: The 'not touching' of another for fear that it just might be 'sexual' is a relatively recent phenomena. It's also only in relatively recent times that people have been considered to be 'psychologically damaged' or 'scarred for life'. Society seems to take the view that, if psycholgists say it, then it MUST be true. Therefore, I MUST be scarred for life because of a past negative experience. This has become the mind-set of many today. This is why psychiatrists and psychologists can drive around in BMWs and live the affluent lifestyle.

Friends visiting relatives in Canada have informed us here of the volume of people over there who frequent the clinics of psychologists and psychiatrists to receive therapy. The daughter of our friends has such a practice in Canada. This should surely start alarm bells ringing as to the influence of psychology on the average person. I don't have the facts but I would think that the demand for such psychological therapy would be more prevalent in the U.S. and Canada than here in Australia. I think it's a cultural thing that will probably arrive here all too soon.

I really don't want to make such a huge deal out of the relatively simple issue being discussed on this thread. I do wish, however, that more people became aware that 'psychology' seems to have 'created' or 'cashed in' on issues that it believes only IT can resolve. Society, impressed by the 'expert' jargon of academics, has taken on that belief too. Just consider this for a moment because it's true ...the MORE psychologists and social workers that are churned out of university, the MORE is also required that psychologists and social workers have to justify their existence.

This can lead to misleading beliefs such as 'there's a child molester on every corner of the street waiting to get at your kid'. No there isn't. The media, in turn, picks up on this line of thought and instils fear into people about dangers that CAN - but most likely DON'T - exist in one's daily life. My elderly neighbor makes sure that her door is locked each evening at 6pm. She's fearful but doesn't quite know why. She is suffering from 'media-induced' paranoia which is more dangerous to society than 'the dangers' that it's telling us about. There is nothing healthy about a suspicious and a paranoid society. We really do need to get a grip both on reality and on rationality. That's pretty well what I'm getting at.

Where in Australia are you located, by the way? I'm here in the tropics of Nth QLD ...Townsville.

 

[Klee shay]

This can lead to misleading beliefs such as 'there's a child molester on every corner of the street waiting to get at your kid'. No there isn't.

They're more likely to be in your own family or someone you know through the family.

I was unfortunately one of those children who were touched. I know the dangers - I lived it. So to me it is a very real situation that can happen to anyone.

That doesn't automatically mean that everyone should be paranoid about the wrong people however; but it doesn't hurt to instill in your children a sense of permission. People should not just be able to reach out and fondle your children in any fashion. It might be completely innnocent or it might not be.

A sexual preditor preys on innocent situations. They prey on the fact that people get carried away with not touching, and they set people up to believe they are paranoid about the dangers. So when their children react distantly towards the sexual preditor once they've touched them inappropriately; the preditor can then put it down to the child picking up the paranoia from the parents being over-protective, and continue the abuse under the parent's noses.

I'm only saying this because it's a reailty. As real as the pendulum swinging the other way to extreme paranoia. We could associate some of the extremity to the fields involved with psychology; however, we should not then use it as a reason to set our children up for abuse. Children do pick up on their parent's disposition without needing instruction.

If mum and dad believe and encourage that anyone can touch them, when they are touched they don't know who to tell or even that what the person did was wrong? It feels wrong but all they have is their parent's disposition to go by and they seem happy to encourage others to go into their personal space without permission.

We don't have to teach our children that there is a sexual preditor on every corner, but we can teach them about permission to touch.

I think men who are genuine about affection towards young children and are not sexual preditors - respect children's boundaries anyway because it is such a real danger today. They will only ever hold that child around the parents or other adults and will treat them with genuine affection rather than sexual interest.

I've known quite a few guys who act like this and the kids love them; and they love the innocent affection. I love seeing this kind of relationship develop too, because I've seen where it goes wrong and it's nice to know that affection can still be given to children without it becoming about total abstinance.

Where in Australia are you located, by the way? I'm here in the tropics of Nth QLD ...Townsville.

Toowoomba, Queensland. A little colder than what you're used to I imagine. :

 

[jorel7am]

Sputnik:Thanks for your input "SputnikBoy"! - Jorel d'Aguilar

 

[jorel7am]

Thanks again for helping with the subject!

 

[jorel7am]

Thanks for posting "Nostalgic Dawn" - Jorel d'Aguilar -

 

[jorel7am]

Thanks for posting Klee Shay! - Jorel d'Aguilar -

 

[SputnikBoy]

Sputnik:Thanks for your input "SputnikBoy"! - Jorel d'Aguilar

Sputnik: You're welcome, my friend.