Teachable Moments ***Could use some quick responses

[Danus]

As Parents,we often get lost in the every day. I don't know about the rest of you, but My wife and I have a full day. There is hardly room for anything outside of .........:fullauto"The Schedule"!

Get the kids up and off the school. we go to work, pick up the kids in the afternoon. Take the kids to any extra event. In our case tiquando, girl scouts, and gymnastics. These are spread out over the week. Get home, and one of us starts dinner while the other goes through homework and study time. After dinner, hit the showers and get ready for bed. Lights out at 21:00 for the kids (9:00 PM). But, life also happens in the midst of all this, and by life I mean the things handed to us by God and the things we wrestle with that are far more valuable to learn and know.

Recently my youngest Daughter bought a hamster. (Yes I think you know where I'm going with this.) She saved her money. Did everything I asked her do do. She researched hamsters. Did a cost analysis. Wrote a paper. These where all teachable moments I used. On the day of permission she was so exited! she got the cage, the food, toys and her new little bundle of joy, "Nibbles". All total $98.00 of hard earned money spent with love and the best of intentions. That was last week.

Yesterday when we got home from the fair, my oldest daughter was having her friend spend the night, and on the ride home my youngest was telling all about nibbles and eager to show her off. All three ran to my youngest daughters room, but something was not right with Nibbles.

When we confirmed the inevitable, I had to watch and listen to my daughter choke with tears and sobs and ask me.."why did this happen Daddy?" All I could say was; "I don't know, but it's not your fault."

That got me thinking, this is another teachable moment, only it's deeper than just learning writing skills or math. This is about life and death.

This morning I am drawing up notes to further discuss this issue with my 8 year old. I plan on having this talk after church. I want to hit on the bigger issues about God, and why we experience death, and then wrap it all up with the promise of life that God gives us. I don't exactly know what I will say, but I will share it with all here and if anyone has any ideas to post to me in the next few hours please do so.

 

[Bonairos]

This morning I am drawing up notes to further discuss this issue with my 8 year old. I plan on having this talk after church. I want to hit on the bigger issues about God, and why we experience death, and then wrap it all up with the promise of life that God gives us. I don't exactly know what I will say, but I will share it with all here and if anyone has any ideas to post to me in the next few hours please do so.

Sounds good my brother. 8 years old? You might also want to include (somewhere in the moment/along the lines of) how privileged she was to be able to give Nibbles her best during the (limited) time she had with him/her.

Life can end when we least expect it. What matters is that we did our best in making the time count (maybe a little from what could have been Nibbles perspective of being cared for and loved by her?).

For what it's worth.


Be blessed, Stay blessed, and be Bold!

 

[reba]

She is only 8? Please replace the hamster.
He has replaced many things i have lost.
Some moments are to teach dad to be heroes.

 

[handy]

Definitely a teachable moment.

We experience a lot of these kinds of moments here on our farm. One thing I've always stressed with the kids is that God's eye is on the sparrow, as well as on the various rats, mice, rabbits, snakes, turkeys, ducks, cats and dogs that have been a part of our family. My kids have a pretty good understanding that God cares for all His creation, that sin and death impact a lot more than just our own life and that we can look forward to God's new earth in which the pain and sorrow of death will never be felt.

The part about the pet knowing love and care during the time the child has had it is truly important.

Also, dealing with the death of a pet helps a child learn to deal with other losses that are sure to come in this life. They can also learn that there are some things that truly need to be left in God's hands...like why Nibbles died, even when he was loved and cared for.

And, yes, as soon as she's ready, do let her get another pet.

{{{Hugs}}} to your little girl.

 

[Danus]

Thank you all very much. I took a piece from each.

We had a good day. Mama slept with the youngster last night because she could not sleep alone in her grief. We went to church, and My oldest and her friend did an awesome job arranging a respectable funeral for Nibbles. The girls wrote poems and each said a few words. it was sweet, cute and real.

I took my youngest to the pet store and we did get a new hamster, Daisy. This was a choice I gave my daughter. Being 8 years old you can bounce back pretty quick from a tragedy I suppose, but when we got home it was just she and I, and we had a great talk about life, death, this fallen world and God's promise for eternal life.

She's a good hamster mom, and she harbors no guilt over the death of Nibbles. Nibbles died peacefully and comfortably. She left us in the best of care, and as my daughter put it; "who knows she could have been rather old." It's nice to know she had the best week of her life in the care of someone who loved her very much. ;)

Having all ladies in the house does something to a man. You care so much for them, and you treat them like delicate flowers when in fact they are not at all, but they show us a more tender side that veils their strength and toughness. I'm surprised at what they teach me.

I about lost it last night. I could not stand to see her in such pain and crying as she got ready for bed. It was real grief. I literally did not know what to do. Thank God for my wife. She was able to insert understanding where I would have simply wanted to explain it away, or fix things somehow I guess. She did not need an explanation, but understanding.

When we had our talk about God, I used her bible and she said to me; "I know all about this daddy. It's the circle of life, but that does not make it any easier. Sometimes I just need to cry." ....hum That got me thinking, so I said; "Your right." I grabbed my bible and introduced her to Ecclesiastes 3 (A Time for Everything)

1 There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens:
2 a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, 3 a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, 4 a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance, 5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing, 6 a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away, 7 a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak, 8 a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace.

Teachable moments go both ways I suppose.

 

[BobbyKing]

Hi Danus

Thank you so much for sharing this. I am so encouraged, especially by how you are involved in each of your family members. Personally, I think you are doing great, I really mean it!

Like yourself, I am father of 3 girls and surrounded by ladies too. At times, I feel vulnerable, wonder how far I can protect them and be with them as much as they need me. And after some soul searching, I realized that as much as we want to help them, we do not have all the answers. Like yourself, I take the responsibility of sharing God's word in the family. I want to say and teach as much as I want but I also remind myself that the Holy Spirit is the teacher too.

Hence, after you have shared God's word to your daughters, it is also good to step back and let God do the inner work through them. I found this to be rewarding as each time after a family bible study, one of my girls would approach me and relate how God speaks to her regarding her difficult situation.

 

[handy]

Sweet guys.

You guys may be "stronger" but frankly, we women really are "tougher". That's why you need us. ;)