Our 5 and 6 year old still come in our bed occasionally when my husband works. I'm a very heavy sleeper, but if I wake up, I take them back to their own bed.
If you think about it, there aren't many 10 year olds still sleeping with their parents. Maybe he'd break himself, but I personally wanted to break my kids of it QUICK.
As for discipline, each child is different. My 6 year old is threatened just by a "look" I give her. She will run in fear from me. I very very very rarely ever have to spank her. Time out works just as well, so I opt for that.
My 5 year old on the other hand is completely different. She is VERY strong willed and time out does NOT work for her. She'll fight me with everything she's got and she is STRONG. If I can eventually drag her to her room, she'll kick her door to the point that I know she'll put a hole through it if I don't stop her. We eventually gave up on the time out thing and I would slap the back of her leg with a plastic spatula. It works GREAT because it will sting. No bruising and the pain is very short lived, but it really gets their attention. It has worked well for us and the tantrums started becoming less and less frequent. Now, all we have to do is get the spatula and she'll go running and we usually don't have to use it.
MANY on here will disagree with spanking. But, I know my child and I know what WASN'T working. I refuse to have my kids act like some of the kids that I see in stores these days. If my kids talked to me the way that some other kids do, I wouldn't hesitate to slap their mouths.
Have you tried a token/chip system? I'm getting ready to start this. My 6 year old is terrible about doing homework and cleaning her room. My 5 year old has a bad habit of being mean to her sister. So, I'm going to use the token system to try and get them to improve in these areas. Here's info on it:
1. Token System: Use it with children upto 7-8 years of age. A token is a "token" for a reward. Let children "cash" this token for a reward they want. Large colorful poker chips make good tokens and small children don't run the risk of swallowing them. Keep a clear-glass small bottle (size of Gerber-baby food bottle) in which the child saves tokens he/she earns. This is the "piggy bank" of tokens. The sight of the bottle swelling up with bright colored tokens, can swell the pride and joy of little ones. Perhaps, it will also make them impatient. When the token bottle is full, exchange it for rewards such as, ice-cream, toy, a trip to a park, reading a story to your child, etc.
Keep tokens handy near by or, keep them in your pocket. Tokens in your pocket are handy when you take your children to a store and reward them for behaving in the store. Every time, you see the child performing the desired behavior, hand out a token and tell the child what it is for. For example, "This is for helping mom with the dishes or, cleaning your room or, reading the story to your little brother,' etc.. Don't make vague references, such as, "this is for being a good kid." Always specify the behavior you are rewarding . Reward immediately, not one hour later, not after you finish the task on hand, but right away. Immediacy of reward has a powerful effect.
: ! And they are devastated when they get a token taken away. As of now, it's gonna take a while before they hit 20 tokens and I think that is why it's working so well. They are quickly realizing that they have to EARN their tokens and control their behavior.