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[__ Prayer __] tormented christian please read my story and help me out

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sonictaps

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My name is Tapiwa and this is my story. I have been a Christian all my life. When I was around 11-13 ( can't remember ), I made a joke about Jesus and the Holy spirit and my sister pointed out that, sinning against the Holy Spirit was unforgivable. After learning this I was tormented and went to the pastor to see if there was any way I could be saved. He said I didn't know what I was saying and that I am Okay, which relieved me. Flashforward to now, a couple of days ago for some reason I was tormented by the fact of that day even though the pastor said I was ok. I started reading forums and asking friends what sinning against the Holy ghost really meant. From what I gathered, it is forsaking the salvation that the Holy Ghost gives. Rejecting his works. I prayed hard and I continue to pray but for some reason my mind started saying stuff like ' I reject the Holy Ghost ', when in my heart I'm not. It's as if satan is controlling me. I pray so hard with my might and in my heart I can feel Jesus but I have this extreme torment in my mind and my heart feels so heavy as if I have actually committed the sin, even though I know I haven't. My mind is controlling me but my heart is untouchable ( i believe Jesus in there, I can feel it ). I have read the bible quiet alot and as I type this those voices keep returning into my head. I can't sleep properly, I am eating way less and I am completely failing to enjoy my life. I am praying alot but my mind keeps controlling me. I really do not know what to do at this moment in time, please please If any can give me an answer, or please pray for me so I can get one, because I am afraid of my mind and don't trust it any more. These thoughts keep coming back and I just don't know what to do. Please help me!
 
Ya, know, I may be wrong, but the OP'er sounds young and going through this "unpardonable sin" stuff that I and many of you probably went thorough at one time or another.

Someone who committed a sin against the Holy Spirit never cares about God again. The last thing they'd be worried about is hurting the Holy Spirit and worrying about salvation.

So, what's the real fear here? The fear is that a person will be eternally lost, in torment in hell forever. While I do believe Jesus taught in that place, I discovered that the nature of which is not what is commonly taught and that indeed nobody is even there yet since the judgment did not take place. I think it's time for the church to stop spreading Babylonian fear doctrines and other Halloween stories and we won't have Christians as this being afraid of their own Lord all the time. Then atheists come on boards like this and laugh at the miserable people instead of being strong, moral, productive and happy.

Remember what a little leaven does mixing with pure doctrine. History shows that fear and oppression and Boogie men never controlled anyone, and indeed it is Satan's tactics to rob people of the joy of their salvation, and to make them into a basket case.
 
My name is Tapiwa and this is my story. I have been a Christian all my life. When I was around 11-13 ( can't remember ), I made a joke about Jesus and the Holy spirit and my sister pointed out that, sinning against the Holy Spirit was unforgivable. After learning this I was tormented and went to the pastor to see if there was any way I could be saved. He said I didn't know what I was saying and that I am Okay, which relieved me. Flashforward to now, a couple of days ago for some reason I was tormented by the fact of that day even though the pastor said I was ok. I started reading forums and asking friends what sinning against the Holy ghost really meant. From what I gathered, it is forsaking the salvation that the Holy Ghost gives. Rejecting his works. I prayed hard and I continue to pray but for some reason my mind started saying stuff like ' I reject the Holy Ghost ', when in my heart I'm not. It's as if satan is controlling me. I pray so hard with my might and in my heart I can feel Jesus but I have this extreme torment in my mind and my heart feels so heavy as if I have actually committed the sin, even though I know I haven't. My mind is controlling me but my heart is untouchable ( i believe Jesus in there, I can feel it ). I have read the bible quiet alot and as I type this those voices keep returning into my head. I can't sleep properly, I am eating way less and I am completely failing to enjoy my life. I am praying alot but my mind keeps controlling me. I really do not know what to do at this moment in time, please please If any can give me an answer, or please pray for me so I can get one, because I am afraid of my mind and don't trust it any more. These thoughts keep coming back and I just don't know what to do. Please help me!

I think I can understand what you are going through because I had and am currently coming out of a similar situation where I thought I could not be saved.

You know what has helped me a lot... First, trust in Jesus. Also, dig into His Word in the Bible. I have multiple Bible verses that I like to read when I feel in trouble. Also, resist all the bad thoughts.

Let me know if you want to know what Bible verses I specifically use in times of trouble.
 
Blasphemy of the Holy Spirit refers to accusing the Holy Spirit of being a power of the Devil. Even if you did that in jest you didn't mean it in your heart because honestly if we're all held to account for jokes in poor taste we're all pretty much messed up.

Satan is messing with your mind but you can cast him out in the name of Jesus Christ. Reject him and repeat as needed but know that Jesus loves you and if he forgave the soldiers that hung him on the cross and murdered him he will surely forgive people like you and I who proudly proclaim that Jesus is Lord of all.

You're in my prayers.
 
Yep, definitely Satan whispering thoughts into your head. He wants you think that you are unsaved so then you walk forward without any hope or peace. He wants to ruin your salvation by telling lies. Dont listen to him. I have been through battles time and time again where i wondered if God ever really loved me or I was ever truly saved, and I know it was just satan trying to destroy me so i would walk away empty. In fact the more you draw towards God the more Satan may try to attack you. You should read Ephesians 6 and fully equip yourself with Gods armor. Remember that when you resist him, he must flee, but it may be a fierce battle first.
 
My name is Tapiwa and this is my story. I have been a Christian all my life. When I was around 11-13 ( can't remember ), I made a joke about Jesus and the Holy spirit and my sister pointed out that, sinning against the Holy Spirit was unforgivable. After learning this I was tormented and went to the pastor to see if there was any way I could be saved. He said I didn't know what I was saying and that I am Okay, which relieved me. Flashforward to now, a couple of days ago for some reason I was tormented by the fact of that day even though the pastor said I was ok. I started reading forums and asking friends what sinning against the Holy ghost really meant. From what I gathered, it is forsaking the salvation that the Holy Ghost gives. Rejecting his works. I prayed hard and I continue to pray but for some reason my mind started saying stuff like ' I reject the Holy Ghost ', when in my heart I'm not. It's as if satan is controlling me. I pray so hard with my might and in my heart I can feel Jesus but I have this extreme torment in my mind and my heart feels so heavy as if I have actually committed the sin, even though I know I haven't. My mind is controlling me but my heart is untouchable ( i believe Jesus in there, I can feel it ). I have read the bible quiet alot and as I type this those voices keep returning into my head. I can't sleep properly, I am eating way less and I am completely failing to enjoy my life. I am praying alot but my mind keeps controlling me. I really do not know what to do at this moment in time, please please If any can give me an answer, or please pray for me so I can get one, because I am afraid of my mind and don't trust it any more. These thoughts keep coming back and I just don't know what to do. Please help me!

(Matt 12:32) And whoever may speak a word against the Son of Man it shall be forgiven to him, but whoever may speak against the Holy Spirit, it shall not be forgiven him, neither in this age, nor in that which is coming.

The question is, who is not forgiving who?

(John 5:22) "For the Father judges no one, but has committed all judgment to the Son, ... (John 5:27) "and has given Him authority to execute judgment also, because He is the Son of Man.

It is Jesus Christ who judges, even the sins against the Holy Spirit.

(1John 1:9) If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us [our] sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

If we confess, Jesus Christ will forgive our sins.

So, don't worry. Sometimes, scripture says what it has to say, not necessarily God works the same way, yet both will not contradict. e.g, Christ calling us gods (John 10:34), Christ saying He is not the son of David (Luke 20:41).
 

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