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A Q for all: If you knew then what you know now?

  • Thread starter Thread starter hgomez2
  • Start date Start date
H

hgomez2

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That is the quintessential question that frequently pops up throughout our lives. As we grow, learn and mature, we absorb lessons learned from our life experiences. We often reflect back and wish that "if only I knew then, what I know now!"

What are some of those "If only's..." in your own life, relationships, finances, business, employment, health, love, spirituality, etc. that you've learned along the way?
 
For me:
* To listen to my parents when I was younger.
* I wish I had saved 10% of all my money. A small sacrifice for a long term reward.
* To have applied myself when education was "free"
 
Wow that was so weird cause I was thinking about that the other day.

I would have made a career in the Navy, and retired from the Navy, have me a good nest egg saved up and built me a cabin up on post about 15 feet in the air in the moutains with a deck on the roof for star gazing with the telescrope, and huge bay window with a huge deck with rocking chairs to watch the wild life and sun rises/sets, on about fifty acres that would have been totally self sufficent, wood stove for heat, with solar energy, windmill for water source, sodd roof, and a 12' chain link fence with scrolled barbwire on top surrounding my property, and had me a few chickens, my little dogs, couple of cows, alittle garden, and a mule for hiking. And a Hummer! to go to town in for groceries. :thumb
 
One thing I've realized pondering this question over the years is that there's usually a pretty good chance we weren't ready for or equipped to make use of the knowledge we gain later in life.

;)
 
Wow Ivy,
I guess I was hoping for more of a philosophical answer ;) :lol

I think that it's good when we learn from our past and ask the question, "How could I have done that differently" with "what I know now" because I think it helps us in our decision process as we encounter new and similar trials or barriers in life. Not only that, but as parents, it helps us to better guide our children.

I think though, that as one ponders this question, there is a danger of looking at the past with regret. Remorse can lead to an understanding which can promote healing which leads to a peacefulness even about tragic situations, but regret can lead to apathy and depression, which doesn't do anyone any good in the long run.

As a parent, I wish that I had gotten closer to my stepdaughter who is now a Junior in H.S. Unfortunately, even as an adult I had some baggage that held me back from really reach out to her, even when I wanted to.

I don't have any regrets where I've failed as a step parent, but rather it gives me strength to step outside my shell and not make the same mistakes twice.
 
Hm...pretty much my entire life is filled with what if's! I started screwing up at an early age and ended up a single mom.

I guess my what if, even if it sounds a little wrong, is 'what if I would have concentrated on school and God instead of how lonely and empty I felt, thus making a stupid mistake with a stupid man and getting pregnant'

Don't get me wrong. I adore my daughter but sometimes I wonder what my life would have been if I would have been smart and had her later in life when I was actually ready.

But living in the past has driven me crazy and I've chosen not to live that way anymore. My daughter saved my life. I'd probably be dead by now.
 
LaMexicana said:
My daughter saved my life. I'd probably be dead by now.
Click to expand...

Isn't it amazing how God always seems to make things work out! :yes
 
StoveBolts said:
LaMexicana said:
My daughter saved my life. I'd probably be dead by now.
Click to expand...

Isn't it amazing how God always seems to make things work out! :yes
Click to expand...

This is true! And that is why I choose not to dwell too much on how I should/could have done things. Finishing college would have been good but I don't think ANYTHING would have snapped me out of my depression other than the Lord giving me my daughter. From the moment I found out, I knew she was going to be the light of my life. And she has been! It hasn't been easy but the Lord has definitely blessed me.
 
What an amazing story LaMexicana !

Even though we don't get all of the answers made known right away, isn't it comforting to know that God is active in our lives, and He knows exactly what our needs are, even when were not exactly sure what they are? :praying
 
StoveBolts said:
What an amazing story LaMexicana !

Even though we don't get all of the answers made known right away, isn't it comforting to know that God is active in our lives, and He knows exactly what our needs are, even when were not exactly sure what they are? :praying
Click to expand...

Having a kid at 21 was THE farthest thing from my mind...I mean, I was in a horrible, dark place. Who knew that a child was what I needed? No one but God obviously. At it wasn't just her changing my life at the time. I've learned a lot of things I never knew about myself in the past 5 years. Things I definitely would have never found out if I continued the way I was going.

It's nice to know that there is someone who knows me better than I know myself :amen
 
I would have spent my entire adolescence differently. Back then I didn't understand the concept of self respect, really. It sounds silly, but when I heard that phrase as a teen I honestly didn't know what it meant and it showed in my actions. I spent my life from age 13 to 24 living under the control of other people, and if it weren't for my Faithful Father making use of all of that I would have said it was a complete waste. Regrets are sour indeed, but I think that it is healthy to evaluate where we went wrong along the way so that we don't make the same mistakes, and are better able to help others avoid them when possible.
 
Rick said:
One thing I've realized pondering this question over the years is that there's usually a pretty good chance we weren't ready for or equipped to make use of the knowledge we gain later in life.

;)
Click to expand...
Oh how true is that ! I was rebuking myself for a long time about a prayer I prayed a long time ago. God answered this prayer and took away the anointing I had at the time. (Long story) I was so young and pride entered and I prayed that the anointing must go, and it did.

Then 30 years later, I still miss it and I asked for forgiveness , but still I felt I should not have done it. But then a friend said: "You do realize that God is a sovereign God and He made you pray that for your own protection. Pride really would have destroyed you and He wanted to protect you"

You see, as a young man, God started giving me words that I had to speak in church. I heard Him VERY clearly in those days. My ears use to close up (like in an airplane ) and I could hear Him speak in that silence. But pride, because of this, crept in and was a heavy thing to fight for me as a youngster. I first had to let it go and grow in the Lord.

God is good.

C
 
Wow Ivy,
I guess I was hoping for more of a philosophical answer ;) :lol
Click to expand...

I just saw this StoveBolts, I didn't mean to ignore you. :D

Truth is, I personally don't have any regrets. It's not that I haven't made mistakes - no way, I have; "To err is human..."! I feel, as we make our choices, God is right there, and that's the most important thing; He knows what it's all about. If we understand it, it's probably not good. ;) What's that saying..."If you want to make God laugh, tell Him your plans"? It reminds me of the Scripture, "If the Lord directs a man's steps, how then can that man know His own way? This explains the life of a person who is actively seeking God; He works ALL things together for good, so why would we want to move or change any element of it, even if it would make more sense (to us), or be less painful?

Now, mistakes aren't sins any more than sins are mistakes. I realize there are those situations where sins, and the consequences, have caused real sorrow. This is no light matter, so I am not making light of it. Instead, it's important to remember the truth of the second half of what Alexander Pope said: "...to forgive is divine." Jesus said, "whoever is forgiven much loves much." That's awesome. To be forgiven of sin; to receive it and know it, is to know love - to know God. The rest is in His care. I just love this, by Oswald Chambers:

"Our yesterdays present irreparable things to us; it is true that we have lost opportunities which will never return, but God can transform this destructive anxiety into a constructive thoughtfulness for the future. Let the past sleep, but let it sleep on the bosom of Christ.

Leave the Irreparable Past in His hands, and step out into the Irresistible Future with Him."
Click to expand...

And I know that's what some of you are conveying. :thumb
 
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