Not_Now.Soon
Member
- Aug 16, 2015
- 2,604
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So there's often thoughts that we shouldn't have. Not ones that are good to share, and other ones that are private and embarrassing. I'll give some examples of what I mean. But my question is how do you diffuse those thoughts? Bury them so that they don't come out again?
Here are some examples. One thought to bury is our anger. They say expressing your thoughts is better then to let it get pent up inside of you, but in the case of anger that doesn't seem true. It spreads the anger around to others as well. What you were angry about and tell that person can get them hurt or defensive and give them reason to be angry with you, which then just feeds the issue of anger if they tell you their anger right back. Or if you tell someone else, it's more off of your back, but nothing is resolved, so if the person that made you angry keeps doing what they do, and you tell your friend about it, it just spreads the negitive view to the other person and helps anger grow in another.
Another example is lust. Both in embarrassing aspects of not wanting to tell anyone, but also in the aspects of you shouldn't tell people. So the need to defuse that thought so you don't lust after a coworker, a person in another relationship, or anyone else while you're in a relationship becomes important. Can't act on those thoughts as easy as you can act on anger, and express them. And shouldn't go into detail about them to a friend in case they start looking at the person your thoughts lusted after, in the same way.
There's probabley other kinds of thoughts that a person probably needs to diffuse on their own, but for the most part I can't think of what else we have that the burden can't be shared and relieved by talking to someone else. Grief, morning, greed, addiction, and so many other things are easier when talking to the right people. At least sometimes.
How do you resolve and defuse your thoughts, when you don't feel strong enough to share them, or when in some cases you probabley shouldn't share them anyways?
Here are some examples. One thought to bury is our anger. They say expressing your thoughts is better then to let it get pent up inside of you, but in the case of anger that doesn't seem true. It spreads the anger around to others as well. What you were angry about and tell that person can get them hurt or defensive and give them reason to be angry with you, which then just feeds the issue of anger if they tell you their anger right back. Or if you tell someone else, it's more off of your back, but nothing is resolved, so if the person that made you angry keeps doing what they do, and you tell your friend about it, it just spreads the negitive view to the other person and helps anger grow in another.
Another example is lust. Both in embarrassing aspects of not wanting to tell anyone, but also in the aspects of you shouldn't tell people. So the need to defuse that thought so you don't lust after a coworker, a person in another relationship, or anyone else while you're in a relationship becomes important. Can't act on those thoughts as easy as you can act on anger, and express them. And shouldn't go into detail about them to a friend in case they start looking at the person your thoughts lusted after, in the same way.
There's probabley other kinds of thoughts that a person probably needs to diffuse on their own, but for the most part I can't think of what else we have that the burden can't be shared and relieved by talking to someone else. Grief, morning, greed, addiction, and so many other things are easier when talking to the right people. At least sometimes.
How do you resolve and defuse your thoughts, when you don't feel strong enough to share them, or when in some cases you probabley shouldn't share them anyways?
