hgchrisfor
Member
Note: Sorry for the length. But please read all of his to get the whole picture.
I was transferred to Chicago for work earlier this year. There I met a Christian girl that I have been hanging out with for about 6-months. She is great and we seem to be a good fit, however, she is not a virgin and admitted she had two sexual partners in the past. But she has not had sex for three years and was recently baptized.
I have had to be very strong to maintain being a virgin and was hoping to marry another to make sure I get to Heaven. - Will marrying a non-virgin affect me getting into Heaven? Should I stop talking with this girl and find a new potential life partner?
It seems in the Bible that sex before marriage is the worst sin, such as "1 Corninthians 6:18 Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body. 19 Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? qYou are not your own, 20 for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body."
But then Paul also says (but he clearly says him not the Lord) in 1 Corinthians 7:12 To the rest I say (I, not the Lord) that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consents to live with him, he should not divorce her. 13 If any woman has a husband who is an unbeliever, and he consents to live with her, she should not divorce him. 14 For the unbelieving husband is made holy because of his wife, and the unbelieving wife is made holy because of her husband. iOtherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy." - This makes me think that there were a lot of relationships with virgin and non-virgins, as most non-believers would probably not be virgins.
I am just soooo confused right now. - I thought this girl was literally the girl of my dreams. She is so great: so sweet, smart, funny, beautiful and we have a lot in common. But it comes out that she has had sex before. - Also she drinks alcohol occasionally and may even get drunk. And once mentioned she would like to try a drug just to experience it.
These three things have really thrown me off. - I think we would be great together and could work together to never drink or even think about any drugs (yes I have tried drinking and pot in high school but have been totally "clean" for about ten years). I think we can work that out as we progress, but I am mostly concerned that she is a non-virgin.
I feel like I have put so much time and money into pursing this the past 6-months - and truly thought she was the perfect girl of my dreams, because she is great.
But I don't want to get caught up in things of this world. I know Heaven should be my number one goal. - I have no idea how to proceed. Should I continue on or should I move on????
To finish, I felt God giving me strong, strong signs to pursue her. So I did. - Now I don't know if it was to actually get to a point where we marry, or to learn not to jump into things too fast, spend too much money and/or not ask the right questions up front right away. Don't assume.
I am just sooo confused. This girl is great, I thought she was my dream girl (so sweet, smart, beautiful) but I don't want to fall into a trap and/or temptation, or get caught up in things of this world. - I don't know if this is a test from God, and I should pull-out. If maybe we are meant to be and I can help her and she can help me. I have no idea what to do and don't want my salvation affected.
I think I could continue forward. I just don't know if that's what God wants me to do...
I was transferred to Chicago for work earlier this year. There I met a Christian girl that I have been hanging out with for about 6-months. She is great and we seem to be a good fit, however, she is not a virgin and admitted she had two sexual partners in the past. But she has not had sex for three years and was recently baptized.
I have had to be very strong to maintain being a virgin and was hoping to marry another to make sure I get to Heaven. - Will marrying a non-virgin affect me getting into Heaven? Should I stop talking with this girl and find a new potential life partner?
It seems in the Bible that sex before marriage is the worst sin, such as "1 Corninthians 6:18 Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body. 19 Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? qYou are not your own, 20 for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body."
But then Paul also says (but he clearly says him not the Lord) in 1 Corinthians 7:12 To the rest I say (I, not the Lord) that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consents to live with him, he should not divorce her. 13 If any woman has a husband who is an unbeliever, and he consents to live with her, she should not divorce him. 14 For the unbelieving husband is made holy because of his wife, and the unbelieving wife is made holy because of her husband. iOtherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy." - This makes me think that there were a lot of relationships with virgin and non-virgins, as most non-believers would probably not be virgins.
I am just soooo confused right now. - I thought this girl was literally the girl of my dreams. She is so great: so sweet, smart, funny, beautiful and we have a lot in common. But it comes out that she has had sex before. - Also she drinks alcohol occasionally and may even get drunk. And once mentioned she would like to try a drug just to experience it.
These three things have really thrown me off. - I think we would be great together and could work together to never drink or even think about any drugs (yes I have tried drinking and pot in high school but have been totally "clean" for about ten years). I think we can work that out as we progress, but I am mostly concerned that she is a non-virgin.
I feel like I have put so much time and money into pursing this the past 6-months - and truly thought she was the perfect girl of my dreams, because she is great.
But I don't want to get caught up in things of this world. I know Heaven should be my number one goal. - I have no idea how to proceed. Should I continue on or should I move on????
To finish, I felt God giving me strong, strong signs to pursue her. So I did. - Now I don't know if it was to actually get to a point where we marry, or to learn not to jump into things too fast, spend too much money and/or not ask the right questions up front right away. Don't assume.
I am just sooo confused. This girl is great, I thought she was my dream girl (so sweet, smart, beautiful) but I don't want to fall into a trap and/or temptation, or get caught up in things of this world. - I don't know if this is a test from God, and I should pull-out. If maybe we are meant to be and I can help her and she can help me. I have no idea what to do and don't want my salvation affected.
I think I could continue forward. I just don't know if that's what God wants me to do...