ChristBearer38

I am a deep thinker and always have been. I started pondering the big questions about purpose, eternal life, God, heaven, hell, when I was just a young kid, and it has shaped the way I think about life and the world today. I'm 38 years old, and my life has been anything but easy. I'm still trying to understand what I did to sabotage my life, because I feel responsible for being hospitalized over 20 times over the past 15 years for something called bipolar disorder. I've had moments of my life where I experienced what I thought at the time was pure peace and serenity, but in retrospect I was far gone and experiencing what some would call manic episodes. Amidst the terror I was causing others and the sporadic behavior I was demonstrating, within my psyche I was excited and feeling on top of the world about my relationship with God. Other times, I experienced terror and dread the likes of which I would wish not even on my worst enemy. I'm here to receive comfort and to comfort. To find purpose and to help others find purpose. I'm not out of the forest yet, but I have been ascending the mountain over the past few years, and I truly believe breakthroughs are coming, not just spiritual and emotional breakthroughs, but also financial, and career breakthroughs.
I ultimately became and stayed a Christian for one reason and one reason only: It made sense of the world more than any other world view, any other way of thinking. It presented me with a way of organizing my thoughts and beliefs, which although from time to time I would doubt them, ultimately I found peace and joy from them. The idea of coming into existence from nothing, and returning to nothing just didn't satisfy my desire for ultimate purpose and meaning, and I thought that if that were the case, life itself is a cosmic joke, and there is no reason to even take it seriously. Why not just eat drink and be merry for tomorrow we die? And all the other religions, although I didn't steady them extensively, I knew enough about them that they had no answer to the problem of human sin, how to deal with our improper thoughts and attitudes, how to make ourselves right with God. Christ answered that need in my life, and he answers it over and over again any time I fall from grace, and succumb to sin. His Grace is greater than my foibles, and He catches me whenever I fall.
I want to build friendships here and find mentors and help mentor and guide others. Thanks for reading and I hope to meet you on ChristianForums.net
Birthday
Oct 3, 1978 (Age: 46)
Location
Grass Valley, California
Gender
Male
Occupation
Sales

Contact

Christian
Yes
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