handy
Member
I'm in a time of life where I'm sort of inter-generational as far as weddings are concerned. Last summer the last of my nephews married, but due to his grandpa's illness, it was a quiet affair that took place in his fiance's home state, and I wasn't able to attend. I haven't been to a wedding in a number of years now.
So, I'm sort of out of the loop when it comes to current trends in weddings.
A cousin of mine is getting married for the first time. I am totally thrilled for him, and hope to be able to go, although since it's in a different state during December, I don't know if I'll be able to. At any rate, if I don't go, we'll certainly send a card and a gift. Generally, whenever we are unable to attend a wedding, we've always just sent a card with a check inserted. Weddings that we attend though, I always try to make it a point to find out something that either the bride or the groom would like and/or need and give that.
Now, here's the thing: When I received the invitation, inserted into it was a little note card that said, "The couple asks for your assistance in fixing up their new home, with monetary gifts over traditional gifts."
Granted, I probably won't make the wedding, so this is exactly what I would have done in the first place, but is this a new trend in weddings? I found it ... well, crass really. I mean, I was brought up with the idea that one never, ever expected any present for any occasion and therefore was utterly delighted with the very idea that one would give any sort of a gift. (Mom really hammered that home to me, as I wrote out thank you cards for anything that was ever given to me, and I hammer my kids with the same thought while they write out theirs.)
But, the that a couple would specifically ask for money at the same time they invited me to their wedding, that just seems really wrong to me.
I know that gift registries are common now, and am used to seeing registry cards inserted in Bridal Shower invitations, but that seems different because the Shower is specifically for giving gifts. I thought the wedding was specifically for celebrating with the couple on their happiest day.
Am I being a hopeless old fuddy-duddy here?
So, I'm sort of out of the loop when it comes to current trends in weddings.
A cousin of mine is getting married for the first time. I am totally thrilled for him, and hope to be able to go, although since it's in a different state during December, I don't know if I'll be able to. At any rate, if I don't go, we'll certainly send a card and a gift. Generally, whenever we are unable to attend a wedding, we've always just sent a card with a check inserted. Weddings that we attend though, I always try to make it a point to find out something that either the bride or the groom would like and/or need and give that.
Now, here's the thing: When I received the invitation, inserted into it was a little note card that said, "The couple asks for your assistance in fixing up their new home, with monetary gifts over traditional gifts."
Granted, I probably won't make the wedding, so this is exactly what I would have done in the first place, but is this a new trend in weddings? I found it ... well, crass really. I mean, I was brought up with the idea that one never, ever expected any present for any occasion and therefore was utterly delighted with the very idea that one would give any sort of a gift. (Mom really hammered that home to me, as I wrote out thank you cards for anything that was ever given to me, and I hammer my kids with the same thought while they write out theirs.)
But, the that a couple would specifically ask for money at the same time they invited me to their wedding, that just seems really wrong to me.
I know that gift registries are common now, and am used to seeing registry cards inserted in Bridal Shower invitations, but that seems different because the Shower is specifically for giving gifts. I thought the wedding was specifically for celebrating with the couple on their happiest day.
Am I being a hopeless old fuddy-duddy here?
