Better to be married or not?

[YosefHayim]

Proverbs 18 says that a man that finds a wife finds a good thing

Yet in 1 Corinthians 7, Paul expresses that it is better to remain single than to be married because you can serve the Lord better. He also says that the non-virgins worry about pleasing their husband or wife.

Can you not serve the Lord just as much married as unmarried? Can not a wife and husband do the same evangelizing, alms, etc., together?

And as far as I can imagine, it shouldn't be hard for a married couple to please each other with non-virgin-ness, as opposed to pauls letter, Didn't God make the flesh to become one?

I'm caught up on this.

 

[AirDancer]

Because we were not designed to be alone, marriage is a very good thing. Provided both spouses have committed relationships with our Lord, then their focus will be centered on the proper foundation with God first in their lives.

However, if one does not wish to marry, then it is fine for the person to remain single. As Paul said, a single person will have more time to spend in Scriptural study and in prayer.

 

[YosefHayim]

As Paul said, a single person will have more time to spend in Scriptural study and in prayer.

That's what doesn't make sense to me. Perhaps we shouldn't spend time with friends or family either? Or work? Can't a husband and wife read scriptures with each other? Proverbs says that iron sharpens iron, and one can't warm himself. Likewise shouldn't two be better than one, helping each other to grow?

 

[AirDancer]

That's what doesn't make sense to me. Perhaps we shouldn't spend time with friends or family either? Or work? Can't a husband and wife read scriptures with each other? Proverbs says that iron sharpens iron, and one can't warm himself. Likewise shouldn't two be better than one, helping each other to grow?

A married couple whose focus is on our Lord will be able to help each other to grow in faith. They provide security to their children, and are blessed by their God-centered union.

There are some people who are better off single. Many of these have become leaders for our Lord....whose lives are filled by doing our Lord's work with others. Traveling evangelists/ministers are examples of this. For that matter, any person who chooses a life that requires not being at home much would be better served to remain single. Trying to be an active parent while being away a lot doesn't work for many people. In addition, being married just for the sake of being married isn't a good idea.

Spending time with friends/family and working are fine, whether one is married or single. But it does require paying attention to what one is doing.

 

[reba]

MAybe this example of a real person can help
real person is my dad...
Dad was a pastor in a small churches in small towns ... To support hie family he had to have a 'real ' job'... so he worked 40 hours per week
some overtime and travel time... so lets say 45 -50 hours falling timber some days were long some very short
There are 168 hours in a week we are now down to 121 lets pretend on 8 hours of sleep now we have 64 hours...
Sunday service 2+ hours Sunday night another 2 59 wednesday night Bible study 2 now 57 hours left
morning shower and shave etc 7 hours 50 hours.. dinner with the family... now we have 43 hours.. dinner or Apple pie inivite... 41 hours
Daddy daddy can you make it to my ball game... or the school is having parents night...Notice no study time has been set aside...A call fro Sister Sally please come to the hospital... time unknown... Brother Joe called his son and wife are fighting please come...

Later when us kids had moved on Dad was able to spend hours upon hours in prayer and study...He was very blessed and a huge blessing to many others.... He would be up before dawn praying us and the grandkids ...
Lam_2:19 Arise, cry out in the night: in the beginning of the watches pour out thine heart like water before the face of the Lord: lift up thy hands toward him for the life of thy young children, that faint for hunger in the top of every street.

Ministry needs lots of time .. wife and kids need lots of time .. holding that balance is very difficult ... We did with dad way too often...
Dad could never have done what he did with out the support of mom .. not always happy about it but in support...

 

[YosefHayim]

MAybe this example of a real person can help
real person is my dad...
Dad was a pastor in a small churches in small towns ... To support hie family he had to have a 'real ' job'... so he worked 40 hours per week
some overtime and travel time... so lets say 45 -50 hours falling timber some days were long some very short
There are 168 hours in a week we are now down to 121 lets pretend on 8 hours of sleep now we have 64 hours...
Sunday service 2+ hours Sunday night another 2 59 wednesday night Bible study 2 now 57 hours left
morning shower and shave etc 7 hours 50 hours.. dinner with the family... now we have 43 hours.. dinner or Apple pie inivite... 41 hours
Daddy daddy can you make it to my ball game... or the school is having parents night...Notice no study time has been set aside...A call fro Sister Sally please come to the hospital... time unknown... Brother Joe called his son and wife are fighting please come...

Later when us kids had moved on Dad was able to spend hours upon hours in prayer and study...He was very blessed and a huge blessing to many others.... He would be up before dawn praying us and the grandkids ...
Lam_2:19 Arise, cry out in the night: in the beginning of the watches pour out thine heart like water before the face of the Lord: lift up thy hands toward him for the life of thy young children, that faint for hunger in the top of every street.

Ministry needs lots of time .. wife and kids need lots of time .. holding that balance is very difficult ... We did with dad way too often...
Dad could never have done what he did with out the support of mom .. not always happy about it but in support...

Why didn't God just stop at Adam and Eve then? I think God is worshipped trough "it is not good for man to be alone", and "love your neighbour as yourself".

 

[reba]

God is the creator of marriage struggles are a good part of life...

 

[evenifigoalone]

I think Paul specified that in this case he was speaking largely from personal opinion, and/or his own experience. I'd take it more as him pointing out some possible cons than a set-in-stone command. What's right for some may not be right for everyone. Some may be strengthened by a good marriage, others may be distracted.

Oh, it was pointed out at my church recently that pharisees had to be married. Paul was a pharisee at one point. So since he specifies that he was single later on in his mission work, something must have happened to his wife at some point before his ministry began. Found this webpage, looks like it has a good explanation on this: http://www.dennyburk.com/was-the-apostle-paul-married/
But just saying, if that was the case he'd have been on both sides of the fence.

 

[Christ_empowered]

Marriage doesn't happen for everybody. I'm a celibate former gay. In all likelihood, between my former gay-ness and my present struggles with mental problems, celibacy is gonna be it for me, and that's OK.

There are other reasons some don't get married. Not enough resources, disabled, mentally ill, just not interested, bad prior marriage(s), personal preference...

For most people, I think marriage is a good thing. I will say that the way the culture and the economy have changed, kids are a major investment, lol, so that kinda makes marriage a little less appealing. 2 are better than 1, for sure, but...sometimes...people find themselves alone, with only family, church family, and The Lord to keep them/us company. It happens. Hopefully, not often, but...yeah, it happens.

 

[Fish Catcher Jim]

That's what doesn't make sense to me. Perhaps we shouldn't spend time with friends or family either? Or work? Can't a husband and wife read scriptures with each other? Proverbs says that iron sharpens iron, and one can't warm himself. Likewise shouldn't two be better than one, helping each other to grow?

Have you ever been married ? If so then you should grasp this.
Married people and yes even Christians can get caught up in things of life, real easy and real fast. Once you bring children into the picture it rerally gets turned around. What i mean is, even though they are Christians they are not taken outof the cares and problems that you face with a family. Husband worries about supporting the family and to many times falls into the trap of spending more time with money matters then God. It happens too easy.

Yes both spouses can serve the Lord together but it is not as easy as it sounds. You BOTH have to have a very close walk with God and have aloud Him to strip off your old nature and ways of doing things and thinking and reacting to things. This all might sound to easy to you but it is not. Especialy with a man and woman involved.
Most couples don't allow God this much freedom in thier lives and relationship.

Pluss you wont always agree and there are those times each month that can be much harder too. It takes a big commitment to God and each other to make a mariage work well these days and then you add Keeping God first in everything gets even tougher. This may sound dumb to you but believe it because it is notso easy.

 

[Lewis]

If you don't feel the need to get married and you don't have any problems not having sex, it is a gift. That God gives to certain people, and you are better able to serve Him. Now it is forced on the Catholics which is why 90 percent of the time it does not work. They end up having sex because it was not God ordained. Paul said it is better to marry than to burn. I forgot the Greek word for the burn, but in other words to burn with passion. Now if you burn with passion for the opposite sex being a Nun is not for you. Now if you don't, it is a gift from God. A man should leave his mother and father and cleve unto his own wife. Pro creation is from God under God's marriage system.

 

[Miss Spaulding]

Because we were not designed to be alone, marriage is a very good thing. Provided both spouses have committed relationships with our Lord, then their focus will be centered on the proper foundation with God first in their lives.

However, if one does not wish to marry, then it is fine for the person to remain single. As Paul said, a single person will have more time to spend in Scriptural study and in prayer.

Basically this.

Although, I can see where a person would be hung up on this and not know exactly what is the right route to take since it is almost as if Paul is contradicting the verse in Proverbs. Lol. He's not, it just can easily appear that way for some.

 

[Cturtle]

Why didn't God just stop at Adam and Eve then? I think God is worshipped trough "it is not good for man to be alone", and "love your neighbour as yourself".

If God had stopped at adam and eve

Why didn't God just stop at Adam and Eve then? I think God is worshipped trough "it is not good for man to be alone", and "love your neighbour as yourself".

Can you explain what you mean in further detail? i believe God wants all your questions answered.
Thanks