daninthelionsden
Member
- Oct 20, 2016
- 3,432
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After being raised in a completely dysfunctional boundaryless family and suffering the consequences in my adult life, I developed a boundary system for families. Of course this system uses the ideal family as its basis and example, but it can be modified to incorporate any type of family. It's purpose is to bring families back to what I believe would be a Christ-centered preferred way a family should work toward and if taught to each generation would develop and protect families from the snares of others. I posted this on this forum a few years ago but all I ever posted has been purged. So I'll repost as I strongly feel it could benefit existing and future families.
The model I chose is that of a target. The Bull'seye is the individual. The individual, once saved, is represented with a Cross in the bullseye. This is the first boundary not be be tampered with. No one is to come between the individual and Christ. Not even a future spouse. Once engaged , the bullseye has a line drawn down the middle as two start becoming one with the Cross remaining in the middle of the bullseye representing a future Christ-centered marriage. Once married, remove the line but not the Cross.....ever. This new boundary is not to be tampered with by anyone. Children are represented by the first ring on the target and create a new boundary. The couple is to protect the children's boundary from all outside this first ring. The second ring is representing the couple's immediate family. Within the second rind are the couple's parents and siblings. This bullseye and first couple of rings are the Core family relationships and play a major role in the functioning and overall well-being of those within the first few rings. Outside of this ring is another ring containing extended family. Great Aunts/Uncles, some cousins. They are to respect the core family and not tamper. Next are friends. They must always respect the family and not tamper. The rings continue out representing church, co-workers, acquaintances, strangers. There are a myriad of examples as to why these boundaries should be respected and guarded against outside tampering of each respective ring.
The model I chose is that of a target. The Bull'seye is the individual. The individual, once saved, is represented with a Cross in the bullseye. This is the first boundary not be be tampered with. No one is to come between the individual and Christ. Not even a future spouse. Once engaged , the bullseye has a line drawn down the middle as two start becoming one with the Cross remaining in the middle of the bullseye representing a future Christ-centered marriage. Once married, remove the line but not the Cross.....ever. This new boundary is not to be tampered with by anyone. Children are represented by the first ring on the target and create a new boundary. The couple is to protect the children's boundary from all outside this first ring. The second ring is representing the couple's immediate family. Within the second rind are the couple's parents and siblings. This bullseye and first couple of rings are the Core family relationships and play a major role in the functioning and overall well-being of those within the first few rings. Outside of this ring is another ring containing extended family. Great Aunts/Uncles, some cousins. They are to respect the core family and not tamper. Next are friends. They must always respect the family and not tamper. The rings continue out representing church, co-workers, acquaintances, strangers. There are a myriad of examples as to why these boundaries should be respected and guarded against outside tampering of each respective ring.