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Can guys smell desperation?

I think that both genders can. I think that people often give off vibes, mannerisms, behaviors, etc. that show their desperation.
 
But what do you guys consider desperate? Because I'm kind of straight up and don't really play games and I'm afraid I'm coming off as a psycho. I'm really not, I just don't mess around, I don't see the point. I'm far from needy, I'm used to being alone...I actually enjoy it. But I am aggressive and I think it's coming off as crazy...my bad! Guess I need to tone it down?
 
Well for myself, I can be pretty much head-over-heels for a gal, but then she stares at me for too long and just creeps me out. Pretty much all the feelings I had for her go right out the window and I want to stay as far away as possible from her.

I also like my personal space a bit.
 
NestForASparrow said:
Well for myself, I can be pretty much head-over-heels for a gal, but then she stares at me for too long and just creeps me out. Pretty much all the feelings I had for her go right out the window and I want to stay as far away as possible from her.

I also like my personal space a bit.

hahaha that is pretty creepy... :lol

I'm not creepy...at least I don't think I am. I just like to lay down the law at the very beginning. There's no use in keeping your feelings/beliefs/wants secret...I think that's dumb. But I've been told I have too many rules. And I've also been told I'm too nice. I don't think I'm super nice just respectful. But it seems like guys either go for ladies that "need" them or treat them badly. I don't do either. I'm independent and but enjoy treating guys as I would like to be treated. I'm too old to be dicphering games and behaviors!
 
LaMexicana said:
But what do you guys consider desperate? Because I'm kind of straight up and don't really play games and I'm afraid I'm coming off as a psycho. I'm really not, I just don't mess around, I don't see the point. I'm far from needy, I'm used to being alone...I actually enjoy it. But I am aggressive and I think it's coming off as crazy...my bad! Guess I need to tone it down?

I dunno if you act desperate or not, so I can't say anything about how I may or may not perceive you or your behavior.

But in a general manner of speaking.....

I would say that both guys and girls who act desperate are clingy and needy. They often try and move fast in a relationship. If the other party is "absent" for a day or so, they go bananas. They can be pushy and demanding. Overly emotional. Overly flirty-- and not just with the immediate object of their affection. Although, they may throw themselves completely into trying to please the immediate object of their affection in an attempt to win them over more readily and in an attempt to be who they think the other wants them to be. They can be flighty and unstable. They constantly act "hurt" over stupid things that the other person does, but it is often an unconscious manipulation (consciously the person really is hurt). They move on very quickly from one person to the next.

Anyhow........ that is just how I perceive both males and females who act desperate. Behaviorally, it may manifest a little differently..... for example, I see females flit from one crush to the next, or have a new guy every month, whereas a male may not flit, but instead he sits and complains about why do girls never go for the "good guy" in an attempt to win sympathy. But once they each "lock on" to an interest, then they seem to act in similar fashions as I described above. Just my observations. Others may have more to contribute. :thumb
 
LaMexicana said:
I'm not creepy...at least I don't think I am. I just like to lay down the law at the very beginning. There's no use in keeping your feelings/beliefs/wants secret...I think that's dumb. But I've been told I have too many rules. And I've also been told I'm too nice. I don't think I'm super nice just respectful. But it seems like guys either go for ladies that "need" them or treat them badly. I don't do either. I'm independent and but enjoy treating guys as I would like to be treated. I'm too old to be dicphering games and behaviors!

You sound fine to me. :lol :thumb I think more people should be direct rather than playing games. I never understand the whole "take a hint" thing. Whatever happened to honesty and communication? :chin
 
PouringRain said:
LaMexicana said:
I'm not creepy...at least I don't think I am. I just like to lay down the law at the very beginning. There's no use in keeping your feelings/beliefs/wants secret...I think that's dumb. But I've been told I have too many rules. And I've also been told I'm too nice. I don't think I'm super nice just respectful. But it seems like guys either go for ladies that "need" them or treat them badly. I don't do either. I'm independent and but enjoy treating guys as I would like to be treated. I'm too old to be dicphering games and behaviors!

You sound fine to me. :lol :thumb I think more people should be direct rather than playing games. I never understand the whole "take a hint" thing. Whatever happened to honesty and communication? :chin

Yeah. I will admit that I am not too good at "taking the hint" so if some gal tries that on me, she will probably just end up single.

Once a couple gals said they had liked me the previous year and I had no clue. I thought they were just being friendly :lol
 
NestForASparrow said:
Yeah. I will admit that I am not too good at "taking the hint" so if some gal tries that on me, she will probably just end up single.

Once a couple gals said they had liked me the previous year and I had no clue. I thought they were just being friendly :lol

You guys are always clueless. :D

I think I am clueless also. I can't figure out if a guy spouting off a really bad joke is his way of flirting, or if he is just trying to be funny. :confused The only time guys talk to me is when they have really bad jokes to tell. And I do mean bad. The kind of joke where I stand there staring at them blankly and have no clue what language they are speaking.

Oh wait....... I just confessed to staring at guys blankly. I must be creepy. :couch
 
Well it is creepy when you stare at us from across a room.

Also. Guys like it when you laugh at our jokes no matter how bad or corny they may be. It is some rule that if a gal laughs at our jokes, especially the really bad ones, they are perfect for us....not so sure if that is a good rule or not, but it would help to laugh at the jokes nonetheless...unless they are the inappropriate jokes because that would show how the guy is as a person.
 
NestForASparrow said:
Well it is creepy when you stare at us from across a room.

Also. Guys like it when you laugh at our jokes no matter how bad or corny they may be. It is some rule that if a gal laughs at our jokes, especially the really bad ones, they are perfect for us....not so sure if that is a good rule or not, but it would help to laugh at the jokes nonetheless...unless they are the inappropriate jokes because that would show how the guy is as a person.

I don't stare from across rooms........ so I guess I pass there.

Laughing at really bad jokes....... I fail. :lol I think I would sound fake if I laughed at half of those....
 
PouringRain said:
LaMexicana said:
I'm not creepy...at least I don't think I am. I just like to lay down the law at the very beginning. There's no use in keeping your feelings/beliefs/wants secret...I think that's dumb. But I've been told I have too many rules. And I've also been told I'm too nice. I don't think I'm super nice just respectful. But it seems like guys either go for ladies that "need" them or treat them badly. I don't do either. I'm independent and but enjoy treating guys as I would like to be treated. I'm too old to be dicphering games and behaviors!

You sound fine to me. :lol :thumb I think more people should be direct rather than playing games. I never understand the whole "take a hint" thing. Whatever happened to honesty and communication? :chin

Who knows? That's what I'm wondering. I used to play the whole game when I was 19...almost 10 years ago. Now I stand back and look at all these guys and ladies just looking like total fools because no one can just say what they want to say! But then again, maybe I'm the one that looks like the idiot for being all up in their face...
 
NestForASparrow said:
Well it is creepy when you stare at us from across a room.

Also. Guys like it when you laugh at our jokes no matter how bad or corny they may be. It is some rule that if a gal laughs at our jokes, especially the really bad ones, they are perfect for us....not so sure if that is a good rule or not, but it would help to laugh at the jokes nonetheless...unless they are the inappropriate jokes because that would show how the guy is as a person.

Like the chick is zoning in on you?? I thought guys dug that...I think it'd be a lot creepier if she was right in front of you and zoning in...eek!
 
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