[__ Prayer __] Giving thanks 😊

[Christ_empowered]

I complain a lot lol but seriously…

I have so much to be thankful for in Christ Jesus. I don’t live luxuriously but I live far more comfortably and a more decent lifestyle than I ever really truly imagined possible all things.

My parents are doing well. Dad came through kidney cancer quickly. The kidney removal seems to have done well for him and he has regular checkups but so far he’s been declared cancer free.


I lost basically all my friends over the course of my walk so far. This includes some Christian acquaintances. And…honestly?!? His will is what counts. Believers get pruned. Christians can share a bond in Christ and not be friends. And of course not all believers are truly in Christ and the first person to check for signs of not being in Christ is…one’s own self. Eek

I have a long term friend who calls me from a big city where she has a good paying corporate job. She’s not a believer so honestly? Measured doses are about what I can deal with and it’s about what scripture seems to allow.

I get freaked out a little bit by the mind games and talk of putting me in a state hospital etc but…

Per scripture nothing has befallen me except that which is common to mankind. I’m learning..bit by bit…to ditch the worldly thinking and lean into Him. Maybe this oppressive weirdness is a catalyst for more genuine development in Christ? It is frustrating when I’m taunted and I’m sleeping or today waking up from a nap because of last night’s distractions lol . But I’m mellow and I generally handle it ok .

Some people openly taunt me with junk from 15-20 years ago. Happens. I’m beginning to suspect that this is simply…

My little piece of the real world at this time. The flat tires have stopped I’m not getting random alarms in my Simplisafe and my parents seem to feel safer at their own home than they did say 3 years ago.

Sorry for rambling as usual. Thank you all.

 

[Christ_empowered]

And…
I was suicidal I was oppressed….

Until age 28 I was an unrepentant sinner. Eek I got a taste of what the world had for me but God made it…not nearly as bad as it could have been. I also have amazing parents.

So at 40 (!) I’m pretty sure I need a minor miracle to take up my plow and push forward. I literally get taunted every day and every night. I know a lot of people don’t want me living here. I was angry now I’m more frustrated .


I know that people mind others business but I respect their privacy so…? Plus it’s gotten intense at times. Not that I’m a helpless sinless victim but I am really just living my life and being as cordial as possible.

No drugs in a very long time. Sad thing? Without Jesus Christ I’d just be…the living breathing remains of a wasted sad existence. In Christ I’ve been made alive made healthy made…imperfect etc but whole.

I want to push outward but I’m blocked. Volunteered…taunts from the cops who did security. Eek I apparently have a high iq estimate now but I’m still coming together fully with basic tasks around other people. I keep my place clean I’m hygienic my writing is better I’m articulate and such…

I dunno giving thanks …

I’m clothed clean healthy smart normal and loved by Jesus Christ and my amazing parents. And I love them too.

Friends generally come and go anyway. To everything there is a season…

In this season I’m going to need to workout and do more…living in the slow lane. Him drum basic moments…


Cleaning my floors tending to my plants quiet prayer a note here and there for a new story etc…

Are what whole lives are built upon. The best part is that I am ostracized etc but I am provided with what I need for life and for…godliness even…

In my little bubble .

Thanks for reading