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Good grief. Eyeroll article of the week: Cats

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ewe-turn

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Are cats the root of all evil? According to the Jehovah's Witnesses, they're right up there.

I came across this gem of an article from a random, unrelated Google search. The title intrigued me enough to read what in the world they were talking about. It's all about why Christians (in this case, Jehovah's Witnesses) should not keep pet cats. Warning, it's long. And completely irrational.

http://www.dbhome.dk/carlo/cat.htm

It would be absolutely hilarous if the author didn't actually believe what he/she was writing. I almost exploded from trying not to laugh at this paragraph in particular:

'Additionally, cats practice many unclean habits not befitting a Christian household: coughing up fur balls, licking inappropriate body areas on their own bodies (well, so do most any animals!)...urination on the floor (ever hear of a 'litter box'?), vocal and blatant promiscuity-unknown to any other species, all others being endowed with Godly chastity and decorum (oh REALLY?), and widespread sexual misconduct without benefit or sanctity of holy matrimony (FOR CATS???) :naughty ...substance abuse of catnip... :rolling :naughty , stealing food from the table, producing ungodly sounds (well, can't argue there), excessive playfullness and the employment of devices not known to have been used by Jesus, :confused , the conducting of its unholy business under the cover of the darkness of the night, and so on.'

:screwloose :screwloose :screwloose

Do you have a kitty cat? If so, :naughty

And once again... :screwloose
 
'Additionally, cats practice many unclean habits not befitting a Christian household: coughing up fur balls, licking inappropriate body areas on their own bodies (well, so do most any animals!)...urination on the floor (ever hear of a 'litter box'?), vocal and blatant promiscuity-unknown to any other species, all others being endowed with Godly chastity and decorum (oh REALLY?), and widespread sexual misconduct without benefit or sanctity of holy matrimony (FOR CATS???) ...substance abuse of catnip... , stealing food from the table, producing ungodly sounds (well, can't argue there), excessive playfullness and the employment of devices not known to have been used by Jesus, , the conducting of its unholy business under the cover of the darkness of the night, and so on.'
Haaaaaaaaaaaaahahahahahahahaha :biglol :rolling :toofunny
 
rotflol-1.gif
 
:rolling

I could not make it past :

The Bible does not say that cats were not present at Herod's birthday party when John the Baptist was beheaded. History shows that cats were most likely present at this tragic party that Jehovah did not approve of.

LOL, I must take a break, before reading the rest. This is way past funny and ridiculous. I am saving it , so I can read it again whenever I feel I need a laugh .
C
 
I have 6 cats. Yes, they spit up all kinds of things, drag in weird animals and whatnot. Actually, I encourage them with such stuff. I guess I would not make a good member in that cult. Maybe I should let some of them take care of my cats. :crazy :biggrin
 
The question of how to dispose of one's unwanted cat is a serious matter. Would it be proper to hand over such a creature of Satan to a person of the world? We see no immediate problem with this, as such a person is already immersed in the wicked ways of this system of things, and so a beastly companion would be a fitting one indeed. They could accompany eachother on the road to destruction, through ignoring God's generous gift of life proffered via His spirit-begotten earthly organization. It is on this same sound principle that a Christian doctor would have no reason to deny blood transfusions to a worldly patient. If, on the other hand, one took the view stated on page 128 of the abovementioned Watchtower, and consider that the pet or any other animal is under the ultimate jurisdiction of a Christian, who therefore bears responsibilities (Eccl. 12:13,14; Jas. 4:17, 1 Pet. 3:21) that are essentially parental in nature. The cat is a dependant. In harmony with this, surely it is the parent's obligation before God to ensure the feline pet is treated as one would an unruly child who repeatedly refused to obey its parents, or of one who committed apostasy. Unfortunately in the case of human offspring, one is limited by the laws of the higher authorities of the land as to what scripturally-ordained punishment may be meted out, as compliance with both sets of laws is necessary in such areas. This may not always be the case in terms of felines, where the fact that we are not living in theocratic countries may not prove such an impediment to what God requires of us, as manmade law may not afford such unmerited protection to cats as it does to humans. God's soldiers would be mindful to apply, where the case merited it and local custom did not prohibit it, the principle of Deut. 21:18-21 which states that: 'In case a man happens to have a [dependant] who is stubborn and rebellious, he not listening to the voice of his [guardian], and they have corrected him but he will not listen to them, his [guardian] must also take hold of him and bring him out to the older men of his city and to the gate of his place, and they must say to the older men of his city, 'This [dependant] of ours is stubborn and rebellious; he is not listening to our voice, being a glutton and a drunkard.' Then all the men of his city must pelt him with stones, and he must die.' The mature follower of Jehovah will do well to be reminded of God's advice in page 503 of The Watchtower of November 15, 1952 where it was held that 'In the case where a father or mother or son or daughter is disfellowshiped, how should such person be treated by members of the family in their family relationship? .. We are not living today among theocratic nations where such members of our fleshly family relationship could be exterminated for apostasy from God and his theocratic organization, as was possible and was ordered in the nation of Israel in the wilderness of Sinai and in the land of Palestine. 'Thou shalt surely kill him; thy hand shall be first upon him to put him to death, and afterwards the hand of all the people. And thou shalt stone him to death with stones, because he hath sought to draw thee away from Jehovah thy God, .. And all Israel shall hear, and fear, and shall do no more any such wickedness as this is in the midst of thee.' -Deut. 13:6-11, AS.' Of course, we can take no legal responsibility for anything which results from your voluntary application of your interpretation of such Biblical principles as you may believe that we have brought to your attention.

Oh my goodness...here they are suggesting that we kill our cats, and that if the U.S. law permitted we should kill our children also for being rebellious as in Deuteronomy 21!!! These people are CRAZY :shocked
 
We can make a gumbo!!! Cats and children taste like chicken....... :chicken

Those people are scraping the bottom of the crazy barrell, someone needs to put a lid on them and throw them over Niagra Falls for a good spin. After having the fear of God put in them if they should survive, maybe they wont be so crazy. Can we say religious spirits of the demonic kind? :screwloose
 
Thankfully, I believe in freedom in Christ.

I don't have a cat, but I feel that there would be 'no condemnation' if I did. Honestly, some people! :lol
 
MISFIT said:
destiny said:
They taste like chicken.

I think this belongs in the "we are what we eat" thread. :rolling

Reminds me of a song my dad used to sing to "Give me a home where the Buffalo Roam"

Oh give me a home, where the Buffalo roam
And I'll show you a house that's a mess.
Since the cat disappeared
My wife's soup tastes so weird
And I keep on meowing all night!


:biggrin
 

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