Autumn Millett first encountered the child welfare system at a young age. Her life seemed beyond her control for so long. It was not until meeting her foster parents, who would later adopt her, that she began to see how God was in control all along.
When Autumn was a young girl, her biological mother passed away. In the years that followed, Autumn and her brother lived in poverty with their father.
The Florida child welfare system was involved frequently in Autumn’s life as she grew older. She remembers the check-ins at school where child welfare professionals would ask her questions: “How does your father treat you? How are you doing? What’s going on in the home?”
Autumn’s home life was not ideal, but it was all she knew.
“We had water and power shut off constantly,” Autumn describes. “We slept together in the same bed […] just to stay warm during winters.”
For Autumn, this was normal.
Although life felt normal for Autumn, she still knew there were problems in her home.
In 2014, Autumn reported the abuse she was facing at the hands of her biological father. She remembers exactly how it felt the moment she told her step-mom.
“We were sitting out on the back porch,” Autumn recalls. “I couldn’t even look her in the eye. There was just so much shame, as though it was my fault.”
Autumn looked to the ground and told her step-mom, “I need help.”
Autumn’s step-mother jumped into action to contact the authorities.
Despite having done nothing wrong, Autumn felt instant regret. She was confused, angry, hurt, and sad. She felt heartbroken because she loved her father, but at the same time, she was grateful to be away from her abuser.
After reporting her father’s abuse, Autumn and her brother moved in with a kin-like family. They first lived with the family of one of Autumn’s friends. Then, they moved in with a different friend’s family.
When neither of these options worked long-term, Autumn and her brother were presented with an option. They could either move to a group home or to a foster family. The two siblings chose the route of a foster family.
Autumn vividly remembers packing up and moving to live with her new foster family, the Johnsons.
“It was a time for me of loss,” she explains. Autumn questioned everything: “Why did this happen to me? Why did this happen to my brother? Why is it that it’s come to this point?”
When Autumn and her brother moved in with the Johnsons, they also relocated to a different county in Florida. They left friends, teachers, and everything familiar to them. It was challenging for Autumn.
But God redeemed the situation.
Autumn’s new foster dad was a pastor. On the drive to the Johnson home, Autumn told her foster dad, Chris, that she was not a Christian. Chris was caught off guard but nodded his head understandingly and smiled. “Well, we’ll get to that,” he replied.
When Autumn arrived at the Johnson home, she instantly felt dirty. “I felt inside me that shame and that guilt,” she recollects. No matter what she did, she could not rid herself of the unclean feeling.
During this time, Autumn attended the church where her foster dad pastored. He was going through the book of Ephesians. She heard over and over how people are dead in their sins and must be made alive through Christ. When Autumn heard Ephesians 2:8-10, everything clicked.
After feeling dirty for so long, Autumn realized, “I have a purpose. I have been chosen. [And] it’s only through Him and His grace.” Autumn came to know Christ as her Savior.
Autumn’s foster parents had experience with children from hard places. They understood the trauma Autumn had faced. “They were able to help lead and guide [me], not just from a pastor’s and a pastor’s wife’s point of view, but from a hands-on experience,” she describes.
With the help of her foster parents, Autumn received the support she needed to begin healing from past trauma. But she did not necessarily view the Johnsons as her “forever” family at this point.
Autumn planned to age out of the foster care system. She had written down all the logistics: where she would live, where she would work, and how she would get there.
But one night, Autumn’s foster parents called her into their bedroom and shared that God had impressed on their hearts to adopt her. Initially, Autumn was unsure. She never thought she would be adopted. But she thought, “Well, if I get adopted, then [my brother] will be adopted as well.”
She felt confident that if she proceeded with the adoption, her brother would be taken care of once she moved out.
But there was one other condition for adoption: a name change.
When it came to changing her last name, Autumn was indifferent. She figured, “I’ll change my last name again if I get married.” Then Autumn’s foster parents suggested a new middle name: Hope. Autumn was alright with that change, too.
But when they mentioned changing her first name, Autumn was not so easily convinced. Autumn’s foster parents encouraged her to pray about it because they felt it was an important part of her adoption.
When Autumn first said “yes” to the complete name change, she did so for her brother’s sake. She wanted to walk through the adoption process alongside him. But the name “Autumn” grew on her. Ultimately, God helped her fall in love with the name.
Her foster parents explained it to her like this: “Autumn is a season of death. It’s a season of getting rid of the old to make way for the new.”
Now, Autumn understands. “What else can I say? My past was dead. I am now alive in Christ,” she exclaims
Not long after, Autumn officially became part of the Johnson family.
Autumn’s foster parents played a key role in her life as she planned for her future. They encouraged her to attend Word of Life Bible Institute before going to Stetson University. There, she met her husband, Corey.
After spending a year at Word of Life Bible Institute and then graduating from Stetson University, Autumn followed God’s calling to work at Gigi’s House, a faith-based home that serves young girls who are victims of sex trafficking. Autumn became a “house mom” and served girls who had experienced trauma and pain.
When Autumn’s time at Gigi’s House came to a close, she followed God’s call to work at the Christian Women’s Center.
At first, Autumn questioned why she would be called there. “I personally don’t have any experiences with drug addiction or alcohol or any of that,” she had thought. But one day, her brother emphasized how Autumn had experienced the effects of addiction—from her biological father, step-mother, and others.
Now, Autumn sees how God intricately planned her life.
In her work at the Christian Women’s Center, Autumn advocates for women fighting to get back on their feet. Many of these women have children in foster care with whom they are working to reunify.
As a former foster youth, Autumn has been on the other side. And now, she uses her story and experiences to help others find true healing in Christ.
Looking back, Autumn sees that one of the main ways her foster (now adoptive) parents helped her heal was by building trust. They did not pretend that nothing was happening. Rather, they walked through her emotions with her.
Autumn’s foster parents reassured her that they would be there for her. They helped her feel safe. And they reminded her of her worth.
“Start small,” Autumn advises. “It’s the little things that really matter.” Autumn knows that because her foster parents built trust when it came to the little things, she could trust them with the big things.
Autumn encourages everyone to get involved in foster care, whether by opening their home to children or by supporting families that do. To learn more about foster care and adoption, visit WaitNoMore.org.
The post How God Used My Foster Parents to Change My Life appeared first on Focus on the Family.
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Growing Up with Child Welfare Involved
When Autumn was a young girl, her biological mother passed away. In the years that followed, Autumn and her brother lived in poverty with their father.
The Florida child welfare system was involved frequently in Autumn’s life as she grew older. She remembers the check-ins at school where child welfare professionals would ask her questions: “How does your father treat you? How are you doing? What’s going on in the home?”
Autumn’s home life was not ideal, but it was all she knew.
“We had water and power shut off constantly,” Autumn describes. “We slept together in the same bed […] just to stay warm during winters.”
For Autumn, this was normal.
Reporting the Abuse
Although life felt normal for Autumn, she still knew there were problems in her home.
In 2014, Autumn reported the abuse she was facing at the hands of her biological father. She remembers exactly how it felt the moment she told her step-mom.
“We were sitting out on the back porch,” Autumn recalls. “I couldn’t even look her in the eye. There was just so much shame, as though it was my fault.”
Autumn looked to the ground and told her step-mom, “I need help.”
Autumn’s step-mother jumped into action to contact the authorities.
Despite having done nothing wrong, Autumn felt instant regret. She was confused, angry, hurt, and sad. She felt heartbroken because she loved her father, but at the same time, she was grateful to be away from her abuser.
Trying to Find a Family Fit
After reporting her father’s abuse, Autumn and her brother moved in with a kin-like family. They first lived with the family of one of Autumn’s friends. Then, they moved in with a different friend’s family.
When neither of these options worked long-term, Autumn and her brother were presented with an option. They could either move to a group home or to a foster family. The two siblings chose the route of a foster family.
Autumn vividly remembers packing up and moving to live with her new foster family, the Johnsons.
“It was a time for me of loss,” she explains. Autumn questioned everything: “Why did this happen to me? Why did this happen to my brother? Why is it that it’s come to this point?”
When Autumn and her brother moved in with the Johnsons, they also relocated to a different county in Florida. They left friends, teachers, and everything familiar to them. It was challenging for Autumn.
But God redeemed the situation.
When God Intervenes
Autumn’s new foster dad was a pastor. On the drive to the Johnson home, Autumn told her foster dad, Chris, that she was not a Christian. Chris was caught off guard but nodded his head understandingly and smiled. “Well, we’ll get to that,” he replied.
When Autumn arrived at the Johnson home, she instantly felt dirty. “I felt inside me that shame and that guilt,” she recollects. No matter what she did, she could not rid herself of the unclean feeling.
During this time, Autumn attended the church where her foster dad pastored. He was going through the book of Ephesians. She heard over and over how people are dead in their sins and must be made alive through Christ. When Autumn heard Ephesians 2:8-10, everything clicked.
For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast.
Ephesians 2:8-9 (ESV)
After feeling dirty for so long, Autumn realized, “I have a purpose. I have been chosen. [And] it’s only through Him and His grace.” Autumn came to know Christ as her Savior.
Figuring out Her Future Alongside her Foster Parents
Autumn’s foster parents had experience with children from hard places. They understood the trauma Autumn had faced. “They were able to help lead and guide [me], not just from a pastor’s and a pastor’s wife’s point of view, but from a hands-on experience,” she describes.
With the help of her foster parents, Autumn received the support she needed to begin healing from past trauma. But she did not necessarily view the Johnsons as her “forever” family at this point.
Autumn planned to age out of the foster care system. She had written down all the logistics: where she would live, where she would work, and how she would get there.
But one night, Autumn’s foster parents called her into their bedroom and shared that God had impressed on their hearts to adopt her. Initially, Autumn was unsure. She never thought she would be adopted. But she thought, “Well, if I get adopted, then [my brother] will be adopted as well.”
She felt confident that if she proceeded with the adoption, her brother would be taken care of once she moved out.
A New Season and a New Name
But there was one other condition for adoption: a name change.
When it came to changing her last name, Autumn was indifferent. She figured, “I’ll change my last name again if I get married.” Then Autumn’s foster parents suggested a new middle name: Hope. Autumn was alright with that change, too.
But when they mentioned changing her first name, Autumn was not so easily convinced. Autumn’s foster parents encouraged her to pray about it because they felt it was an important part of her adoption.
When Autumn first said “yes” to the complete name change, she did so for her brother’s sake. She wanted to walk through the adoption process alongside him. But the name “Autumn” grew on her. Ultimately, God helped her fall in love with the name.
Her foster parents explained it to her like this: “Autumn is a season of death. It’s a season of getting rid of the old to make way for the new.”
Now, Autumn understands. “What else can I say? My past was dead. I am now alive in Christ,” she exclaims
Not long after, Autumn officially became part of the Johnson family.
Moving Forward in Life
Autumn’s foster parents played a key role in her life as she planned for her future. They encouraged her to attend Word of Life Bible Institute before going to Stetson University. There, she met her husband, Corey.
After spending a year at Word of Life Bible Institute and then graduating from Stetson University, Autumn followed God’s calling to work at Gigi’s House, a faith-based home that serves young girls who are victims of sex trafficking. Autumn became a “house mom” and served girls who had experienced trauma and pain.
When Autumn’s time at Gigi’s House came to a close, she followed God’s call to work at the Christian Women’s Center.
At first, Autumn questioned why she would be called there. “I personally don’t have any experiences with drug addiction or alcohol or any of that,” she had thought. But one day, her brother emphasized how Autumn had experienced the effects of addiction—from her biological father, step-mother, and others.
Now, Autumn sees how God intricately planned her life.
In her work at the Christian Women’s Center, Autumn advocates for women fighting to get back on their feet. Many of these women have children in foster care with whom they are working to reunify.
As a former foster youth, Autumn has been on the other side. And now, she uses her story and experiences to help others find true healing in Christ.
The Importance of Building Trust as Foster Parents
Looking back, Autumn sees that one of the main ways her foster (now adoptive) parents helped her heal was by building trust. They did not pretend that nothing was happening. Rather, they walked through her emotions with her.
Autumn’s foster parents reassured her that they would be there for her. They helped her feel safe. And they reminded her of her worth.
“Start small,” Autumn advises. “It’s the little things that really matter.” Autumn knows that because her foster parents built trust when it came to the little things, she could trust them with the big things.
Autumn encourages everyone to get involved in foster care, whether by opening their home to children or by supporting families that do. To learn more about foster care and adoption, visit WaitNoMore.org.
The post How God Used My Foster Parents to Change My Life appeared first on Focus on the Family.
Continue reading...