Liberal Democrat, Conservative Republican or a Southerner?

[Solo]

Are you a Liberal Democrat, a Conservative Republican or a Southerner?

Here is a little test that will help you decide.

You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you. You a re carrying a Glock cal 40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.

What do you do?

• Liberal Democrat's Answer:[list:2407c]
  Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!
  
  Does the man look poor or oppressed?
  
  Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?
  
  Could we run away?
  
  What does my wife think?
  
  What about the kids?
  
  Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?
  
  What does the law say about this situation?
  
  Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?
  
  Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?
  
  Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?
  
  Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?
  
  If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?
  
  Should I call 9-1-1?
  
  Why is this street so deserted?
  
  We need to raise taxes, have paint and weed day and make this happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.
  
  This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends, listen to the news Media for few days and try to come to a consensus.

[/*:m:2407c]
[*]Conservative Republican's Answer:

• 
  BANG!

[/*:m:2407c]
[*]Southerner's Answer:

• 
  BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
  
  Click..... (Sounds of reloading)
  
  BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
  
  Click
  
  Southerner's Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?"
  
  Southerner's Son: "Can I shoot the next one, Dad!"
  
  Southerner's Wife: "You ain't taking that to the Taxidermist."

[/*:m:2407c][/list:u:2407c]

 

[Guest]

Killing is just so darn funny.....


[/sarcasm]

 

[Featherbop]

How about this:

Liberal Democrat-Shoot him in the leg.

Conservative Republican-Shoot him dead.

Southerner-Shoot him until dead, and then several more for practice, and then give junior some shooting practice.

Fundamentalist Christian-Shoot him in the leg so that he won't die, then try to convert him to christianity. If he doesn't, kill him so that he will go straight to hell.

Liberal Christian-Invite him to church, where it doesn't matter what he believes or does.

George W. Bush-Shoot him dead, then invade a muslim country.

Pat Robertson-Shoot him dead because god told him so.

:-D