Making Christian friends seems harder

[Destructus86]

For a while now i've found making Christian friends at church to be extremely difficult. (I've been to a few churches) I go to the small groups, try to talk to people. But it usuall just ends up being small talk and never going anywhere. Yet I could easily make a non-christian friend.

What i've found is that while my non Christian friends were open to being friends with me right away with Christians they seem to form an internal judgement about me right from the start which creates an emotional/mental wall before they even get to know me. Judgement seems to be a common thing amongst us Christians...if a person isn't dressed like they are from GQ or wear a sweatervest then they become hesitant to know that person.

I realize this is a generalization...but most generalizations come from a partial truth. And the fact that I encounter this vastly more often with Christians than I do non-christians is disturbing to me.

In my current small group the people are nice enough, but we just don't click. Aside from studying God in bible studies we don't have much to talk about with each other. (the age difference doesn't help) They are nice enough people, but they are just a little hestitant to know me. That hesitation is extremely common...yet I rarely find it in non-christians.

I find it sad and disturbing that the people who are called to live in love like Christ seem to be the hardest people to talk to and open up with. Almost like...a christian clique...

Anyone else feel the same?

 

[evenifigoalone]

I must be pretty blessed. I don't think I've ever really known Christians like this, except maybe in some places online.
Not trying to undermine what you're saying, though. It does happen, and it's unfortunate. The church isn't doing it's job when it judges people based on their appearances, so that they don't even get to know them before they decide they want nothing to do with them.

 

[vocalyocal]

For a while now i've found making Christian friends at church to be extremely difficult. (I've been to a few churches) I go to the small groups, try to talk to people. But it usuall just ends up being small talk and never going anywhere. Yet I could easily make a non-christian friend.

What i've found is that while my non Christian friends were open to being friends with me right away with Christians they seem to form an internal judgement about me right from the start which creates an emotional/mental wall before they even get to know me. Judgement seems to be a common thing amongst us Christians...if a person isn't dressed like they are from GQ or wear a sweatervest then they become hesitant to know that person.

I realize this is a generalization...but most generalizations come from a partial truth. And the fact that I encounter this vastly more often with Christians than I do non-christians is disturbing to me.

In my current small group the people are nice enough, but we just don't click. Aside from studying God in bible studies we don't have much to talk about with each other. (the age difference doesn't help) They are nice enough people, but they are just a little hestitant to know me. That hesitation is extremely common...yet I rarely find it in non-christians.

I find it sad and disturbing that the people who are called to live in love like Christ seem to be the hardest people to talk to and open up with. Almost like...a christian clique...

Anyone else feel the same?

you make an observation that you look different, just how crazy do you present yourself, do you have embedded horns surgically implanted, and wear your hair in a large carrot top clown do, wearing leopard skin spandex, with a leather studded jock strap

I'm just trying to grasp how you are so much different is all?

 

[farouk]

Is this partly about dress codes, or what?

I guess friendliness is a two way thing. But more mature Christians should take the intiative to show themselves friendly, anyway.