[__ Prayer __] Merciful God! Vs cruel world šŸŒŽ

Oct 23, 2010
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I think I’m starting to get it. Stigma is an issue in my life and I may just have to accept that it’s here to stay. It’s extra frustrating because all I have on my record is a misdemeanor conviction and I’ve never been to prison never been committed or in a state hospital. Truth doesn’t really matter to those in the world anyway.

A man doing some work in an upstairs unit talked to me this morning as I was on my way out. Easy breezy refreshing. And…

I dropped by a 24 hung box pharmacy in my small city 🌃. Decent prices on the multi serving bottles of iced coffee I like when I’ve forgotten to diy cold brew (to my credit that takes 24 hours). And…

Some static in the store then some woman yelled stuff at me as I was going to my vehicle šŸš—. Ok āœ…

In Christ I’m dealing with it better. I think it’s time to look at it more as…

The way the world works. I don’t know why people keep at it even though I’ve been off of probation for 8 years now, no drugs no drinking and I keep a low profile. It’s confusing 🫤 but I can’t do a deep dive into it because it’s a pointless crazy making waste of time. And…

Ugh šŸ˜‘ God is Love. Truly. This is minor vs what could be happening in my life and…

In this world you shall have trouble but be of good cheer for I have overcome the world.

Trying to stand on His word lean less on me..

Thanks šŸ™
 
So….

Everyone has to deal with this world šŸŒŽ we live in. Some people excel at it! Others…not so much.

I definitely fell into the motto much category pre Jesus. And now?

I’m a high functioning mental patient with a high iq estimate. Not exactly Mr.9 to 5 all of a sudden but in the context of my life…

Something of a miracle.

So now I’m close to my amazing parents. I actually just got back from dinner at their house šŸ . Mama’s recovering nicely btw.

Mental patients don’t matter in modern society…on a good day lol šŸ˜†. So I’m learning to roll with the punches in Christ and doing…better? I think?

It isn’t that I’m a non entity in the absolute sense. Christ spared me forgave me washed me and made me clean 🧽. Now I think it’s more redemption than restoration per se…

Joy comes in the morning. Schizophrenia?!? Apparently. But now I’m healthy and I have the high iq estimate and it’s strange because I’ve got the severe diagnosis but I do better at life than before…well the big thing is before conversion and before growing some in Him.

I’m hoping for a friend or two here locally. Someone around my age who just wants to do wholesome things occasionally. I’m not looking for some emo intense stuff here lol šŸ˜† although maybe eventually they could read my writing āœļø???

I’m thankful…more and more actually.,, that God willed recovery from the involuntary shock treatments and operation. Eek 😱 it’s strange…the more psych treatment they throw at you the worse you’ll get and the more pills šŸ’Š you’ll need. It’s not just me.

But now it’s just the atypical tranquilizer and some seizure drug that help with recurrent depression. Ok so they give me a very low dose sedative I can take as needed but I generally prefer not to…

Rambling! I have so much to be thankful for and it’s God at work. Not that I deserve unending misery or that anyone else does either but often it’s what the world šŸ—ŗļø has for some of us.

Ok āœ… thank you šŸ™
 
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