Oh gentle people

[humble soul]

Oh gentle people
Where art thou?
Oh gentleness
Where are you?

Is it my lack of gentility
Which has turned you off?
Is it my sin?
That has caused you to steer clear

Am I not loving ?
Too busy pointscoring?
Too busy pretending
I am tough enough

Am I a child of God?
Or just a child
Aren't we all just children
Looking for direction?
Looking for kindness and understanding?
Looking for validation

I can pretend I am working for God
But really I am still looking for him
Seeking him in others
Then I see glimpses
But they are only glimpses
Is all pain related to yearning?
If we fully knew our purpose
It would solve a lot of angst

 

[humble soul]

I can pretend I know
You can pretend you know
But we don't know
Be honest
You don't know
You've decided doubt is the enemy
It's my difficult friend

 

[humble soul]

On second thoughts, this is nauseating sentimentalism.
I'm ashamed of writing that. But it's too late.

 

[humble soul]

Look at us. I don't think I'm the only one to be honest. We come here seeking fellowship. But others don't fully understand us. No it's not just my view of the Bible, that separates us. I've been on forums with people who had the same view as me about the Bible. But we still felt alienation. It's mainly personality related. My personality is weird even to myself. Sometimes I am ashamed of my own weirdness. Why did God make me like this? I am such a worry wart. Such an anxiety hound. I lack flexibility as I age. To understand others. I lack patience . I lack the spiritual gifts.
Don't worry. I'm not going to ask you pray for me. That feels like an insult to be honest. It shouldn't. But it does. As if I need praying for? ?

 

[humble soul]

So if I said "I pray for this forum"......what would you say?
Am I sounding holier than thou?
Ami serious?
Well I do honestly hope we find God. The real God. Whatever that means. We seem to have different opinions of who God is.
God remains undefineable. Imo.