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Past Pain to Beauty

Z

zay

Guest
-struggles, past pain to beauty

dancing in the rain
as the praises go up, blessings come down
sometimes it's not as easy to do it, sometimes it's not that easy
when trouble's everywhere around me

trying to remember all those scriptures
all of the wisdom that's been shared
trying to think of all of the good things
struggling to live, remembering you care

it's not easy, fighting the thorns
that have embedded themselves within
the more I grow, seems the more they do
and hence the pain grows with me, struggling to live for you,
all the emotions of flesh and spirit rise and try to stem

confusion knocks and rears its head, sometimes I question where you are
if you're really here, as I go through my list
of various troubles and insecurities
as I finally ask, why me, what's the purpose of this
getting harder and harder to hear your answer

fight to realize you're here, that you've been where I am
that you're still here, that you know where I stand
taking the steps against the odds, you keep me when I fall
cause that's what life is, that's who you are

the redeemer who forgives beyond our recollection
the one with love of such passion, such affection
our father who's not just in Heaven
but everywhere around us

temptations knock on the door that I struggle to keep locked
falling while flying, going back and forth
on the tightrope of the life that I've been living
not a lie, but a self misconception,
trying to look on the map of life, distinguish south from its north
looking for a divine intervention

on the highway to heaven, that's where I want to be
but thats where I am, in the struggle of hell on earth
fighting the odds, statistics, and everything else
trying to live and be like you, be special
live to the standard that's been set,

looking in the mirror, it's so sad, as I see what I've done
the vivid past, the future in cloudy haze,
looking through glasses of past, reason and wisdom phazed,
stumbles try to come crashing past the brim, over the edge
and live through what's dead but dragged till today

looking at my own reflection, in a clear pool of water
I ask myself what do I see, what is it that you see in me
as I look beyond the surface, I see the clouds
and the Heavens in all of it's majestic glory

right behind me, that's where you are
you look past my forgotten transgressions,
redeemed beyond what I can accept, struggles to you weak as can be
but through it all you see your glory within me

a work not done, but full of promise
a vital piece to your master plan
that's who I am, and have come to recognize myself
even though I'm not all the way there, I can with your help

as the invisible wars go down, and I live day by day
to live on through the struggles, you help clear my way
and all I can say is thank you and express my love as best I can
even though it's no comparison to the love you have
so much if I truly knew I couldn't stand

as I look in the mirror and I can start to see
just a glimpse into what you seen in me
as I look past me and see all of you
and see Heaven, past my struggles, not me, focus on you

I can see the way of promise as I start to open my heart
breathe in peace, hear and believe in the anthem of truth
slow but sure promise, it's hard but I try to trust
listening to that inner voice, you
living, moving forward through the pain, slow process of healing, as I come closer to you
 
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