Every time I board a plane, I hear the phrase, “Put on your own oxygen mask first.” The phrase has always resonated with me because, like other parents, I always think my first inclination would be to care for my children or others before looking for my mask. The point is that despite great intentions if I lose consciousness, I will not be able to help my children and could put others in danger. Beyond aviation safety, this idea of tending to your own mask first has application when we turn our attention to what makes a healthy and flourishing ministry.
We live in a time that tests leadership. For most of us, the last few years have been the most challenging to lead, and we have been tested in many ways. If you came into the last few years already low on resilience, you might have found your desire to persevere depleted, if not completely gone. If you came into the last few years already with a strong sense of resilience, you’ve likely found your strength itself tested as well. Whatever normal patterns we’ve been able to reassume in the wake of COVID, everyone would acknowledge that we have arrived at a new and unique cultural moment that will not likely fade anytime soon.
Rather than get caught up in abstract or national debates, we should look at the realities and conversations animating our communities and congregations. In other words, we must put on our own oxygen masks first. To do that, I would suggest three ways: spiritual, familial, and personal.
In the last few years, we have seen far too many pastoral failures—sometimes enormous—on the national stage. But we must also remember how many unknown failures, stumbles, or falls have taken place that we are entirely unaware of. In an era of major headline failures and burnouts, pastors must recognize that every headline begins with small compromises of faith. It’s the small compromises that lead to big compromises.
Often for the Christian leader, those small compromises are in and around areas of spiritual leadership.
Often, we don’t pursue spiritual nurturing because we’re professionals, and herein we sow the seeds of destruction and pride. It starts with compromises in our walk with the Lord.
We must prioritize the needs and aspirations of those closest to us. Familial failures don’t make the news headlines like pastoral moral failures. Still, it is grievous to see how many pastors and church leaders have sacrificed their families on the altar of ministry. The church has become a mistress in the marriages of far too many pastors. In reality, you will eventually stop what you’re doing now. Ultimately, you’re going to retire, and you will die. There is only one group of people you will invest in and continue in a relationship with: your immediate family. Prioritizing your family makes such a difference. There are many attributes to a healthy family life, but prioritizing our families is a big part of putting on our own oxygen mask first.
To be vulnerable, I hesitate to write about personal prioritization, mainly in recognition of my failures in this area. Overextended, burned out, and exhausted are all accurate terms I’ve used to describe myself in the past few years. Even as this has become a conviction as of late, this is not a switch to be flicked but a discipline to pursue as we work to understand and sustain proper health. Of course, there are so many others who would be much better examples than I, and I don’t want to be another pastor who pretends to be an expert and writes something on weight loss after losing some weight.
So, we’ve looked at spiritual, familial, and personal ways to put on our own oxygen mask first. In some ways, I want to say, as one fellow struggler, “do as I say, not as I often do.” Please allow me to encourage you to take those next intentional steps because it turns out that the current cultural moment is not a sprint. Indeed, we’re in a marathon. We will need reservoirs of resilience, communities of support, and the approaches that require us to prioritize putting on our oxygen masks first. We must take the time and make the decisions necessary to thrive long-term. We don’t just want to make it through the short term.
I deeply love pastors and church leaders. I consider much of my ministry focused on pastors and church leaders. Let’s finish well together. Far too many have stumbled, some close to the finish line, some nowhere near it. Let’s put on our own oxygen masks first and seek to finish well together.
Three Key Factors in Facing the Challenges of Today’s Church
Leaders Lean into Conflict–Part 2
Leaders Lean into Conflict–Part 1
The post Put Your Mask on First: Leadership Choices in Turbulent Times appeared first on Focus on the Family.
Continue reading...
We live in a time that tests leadership. For most of us, the last few years have been the most challenging to lead, and we have been tested in many ways. If you came into the last few years already low on resilience, you might have found your desire to persevere depleted, if not completely gone. If you came into the last few years already with a strong sense of resilience, you’ve likely found your strength itself tested as well. Whatever normal patterns we’ve been able to reassume in the wake of COVID, everyone would acknowledge that we have arrived at a new and unique cultural moment that will not likely fade anytime soon.
Rather than get caught up in abstract or national debates, we should look at the realities and conversations animating our communities and congregations. In other words, we must put on our own oxygen masks first. To do that, I would suggest three ways: spiritual, familial, and personal.
First, let’s look at spiritual
In the last few years, we have seen far too many pastoral failures—sometimes enormous—on the national stage. But we must also remember how many unknown failures, stumbles, or falls have taken place that we are entirely unaware of. In an era of major headline failures and burnouts, pastors must recognize that every headline begins with small compromises of faith. It’s the small compromises that lead to big compromises.
Often for the Christian leader, those small compromises are in and around areas of spiritual leadership.
Often, we don’t pursue spiritual nurturing because we’re professionals, and herein we sow the seeds of destruction and pride. It starts with compromises in our walk with the Lord.
Second, we should turn our attention to the family
We must prioritize the needs and aspirations of those closest to us. Familial failures don’t make the news headlines like pastoral moral failures. Still, it is grievous to see how many pastors and church leaders have sacrificed their families on the altar of ministry. The church has become a mistress in the marriages of far too many pastors. In reality, you will eventually stop what you’re doing now. Ultimately, you’re going to retire, and you will die. There is only one group of people you will invest in and continue in a relationship with: your immediate family. Prioritizing your family makes such a difference. There are many attributes to a healthy family life, but prioritizing our families is a big part of putting on our own oxygen mask first.
Finally, in looking at our own masks, there is the obvious calling to reflect on our personal health
To be vulnerable, I hesitate to write about personal prioritization, mainly in recognition of my failures in this area. Overextended, burned out, and exhausted are all accurate terms I’ve used to describe myself in the past few years. Even as this has become a conviction as of late, this is not a switch to be flicked but a discipline to pursue as we work to understand and sustain proper health. Of course, there are so many others who would be much better examples than I, and I don’t want to be another pastor who pretends to be an expert and writes something on weight loss after losing some weight.
So, we’ve looked at spiritual, familial, and personal ways to put on our own oxygen mask first. In some ways, I want to say, as one fellow struggler, “do as I say, not as I often do.” Please allow me to encourage you to take those next intentional steps because it turns out that the current cultural moment is not a sprint. Indeed, we’re in a marathon. We will need reservoirs of resilience, communities of support, and the approaches that require us to prioritize putting on our oxygen masks first. We must take the time and make the decisions necessary to thrive long-term. We don’t just want to make it through the short term.
I deeply love pastors and church leaders. I consider much of my ministry focused on pastors and church leaders. Let’s finish well together. Far too many have stumbled, some close to the finish line, some nowhere near it. Let’s put on our own oxygen masks first and seek to finish well together.
Related:
Three Key Factors in Facing the Challenges of Today’s Church
Leaders Lean into Conflict–Part 2
Leaders Lean into Conflict–Part 1
The post Put Your Mask on First: Leadership Choices in Turbulent Times appeared first on Focus on the Family.
Continue reading...