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Sabbath 5-14-2016 Edgewater Seventh Day BAPTIST Pastor Keith “From Wounded to Whole” I Corinthians 13;4-7
The message that God forgives has a prior condition: that we forgive those who have injured us. "If you do not forgive men their trespasses," Jesus says, "neither will your Father in heaven forgive your trespasses." But forgiveness is not an emotion; Forgiveness is an act of the will, and the will can function regardless of the temperature of the heart. Jesus can help us and it is also the power of the Holy Spirit that helps. We’ve all been wronged in some way or other… we have all been mistreated, victimized, offended... but we cannot live the abundant life that the Lord wants us to live when our days are steeped in unforgiveness – when we hold grudges… when we fail to forgive the ones who have caused us pain.
No one understood the cost of broken relationships better than Jesus. In fact, in one of His final prayers, as He hung dying on the cross, Jesus offered words of reconciliation to the very people who had unjustly accused and convicted Him – the people who were killing Him. “Father, forgive them for they know not what they do.” Right in the midst of being wronged, Jesus forgave those who wronged Him. Now understand, these executioners were not model citizens who just happened to draw the short straw on crucifixion day. These were Roman soldiers that were so filled with violence and rage that the only role fit for them in the Roman Army was cold hearted executioners. They had already beaten Jesus, and sledgehammered spikes into His hands and feet. They played marbles for the garment that they stripped from His back. They spat upon Him and ridiculed Him and mocked Him.
But in the midst of it all… our wounded and exposed Savior forgave… “Father, forgive them for they know not what they do.” What a powerful statement for Jesus to make. And what a powerful and difficult example for us to follow. Mark’s gospel records that “when the centurion, who stood there in front of Jesus, saw how He died, he said, “Surely this man was the Son of God!” Years later the apostle Paul would write in his letter to the church in Rome, “You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous person, though for a good person someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” The prayer that Jesus prayed as He hung on the cross – a prayer for the very men who put Him there – left its mark on the foundation of the Christian faith. While we were still sinners, in the midst of our wrongdoing, Jesus forgave us.
Unfortunately, many of us believe we can go about our lives unaffected by conflicts in our relationships with people we care about. This can be a big bucket drainer. Sometimes we don’t even remember what we are mad about; like on the Andy Griffith show - the feud between the Carters and the Wakefields. Are you holding onto a grudge that you don’t even remember? Of course sometimes, we do understand why, but it can be petty. Wife mad at husband – not enough chips...Mad as a hornet over some Doritos! We should consider if we are being too sensitive. Some other issues causing it? Many such concerns are legitimate like being mistreated, victimized or offended.
*** Jesus Offers Five “Go” Instructions
1 ) **Go - In Matthew 18:15, Jesus outlines what to do in situations where you’ve been wronged…“Moreover if your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he hears you, you have gained your brother.” If there is a rift in a relationship, no matter who caused it, YOU go. YOU take the first step. Whether it’s your problem, or the other persons problem, or somewhere in between; as a child of God, it is your responsibility to initiate an attempt at reconciliation. Don’t sit by the phone waiting for the wrongdoer to call you. If there is friction in your relationship, GO.
2 ) **Go alone – (between you and him alone) Matthew 18:15
Don’t call all your friends together and say, “Do you know what Fred did to me?” “I’m gonna go talk to him in a day or two, but first, I have to tell you all the things he did and said…” What we are really trying to do is get everyone on our side first. It’s human nature to try to garner support from everyone else before you go talk to the one who has wronged you… but Jesus said “Go in private.”
3 ) **Go to reconcile the relationship - Rabbi David A. Nelson likes to tell the story of two brothers who went to their rabbi to settle a longstanding feud. The rabbi got the two to reconcile their differences and shake hands. As they were about to leave, he asked each one to make a wish for the other in honor of the Jewish New Year. The first brother turned to the other and said, "I wish you what you wish me." At that, the second brother threw up his hands and said, "See, Rabbi, he's starting up again!" Have you ever had someone come to you to discuss an issue, and you can tell that all that person really wants is to give you a piece of his mind? There is no desire on his end for reconciliation, in fact, he’s mad! Accusations are flying and he’s just making you feel worse – putting you on the defense. Matthew 18:15 (If he hears you, says Jesus, you have gained your brother) Go for the purpose of gaining your brother. Go with an attitude of reconciliation.
4) **Go now – So we know from Matthew 18:15 that when there is division in a relationship that we are to GO; we aren’t going to tell anyone else, we are going to GO ALONE; and we understand that our hearts must be prepared to GO with a spirit of reconciliation. But how long should you wait before you try to set things right? One day? Ten days? 30 days? Is there a sense of urgency to reconcile a broken relationship? Jesus addresses the “when” question in Matthew 5;23-24: “Therefore if you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift.” If you’re in a worship service…song reminds you of a broken relationship, go (better to be reconciled than to continue singing to God) If you’re reading your bible… verse reminds you of an unresolved issue (chapter will be there when you get back) Go now!
5) **Let it Go – Sometimes you can do everything right. You go, go alone, go in a spirit of reconciliation, and go right now. But the other person says, “No. I’m going to hang onto my anger. I want to hold onto this grudge, and you’re messing it up by coming to me to reconcile. I don’t want to fix anything. So NOW what do we do? Romans 12:17-18 says: Repay no one evil for evil. Have regard for good things in the sight of all men. If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men. You can’t control other people’s responses. If the other party chooses to hold on to the anger and bitterness, after you’ve done everything you can to make amends, then you have to let it go. If the relationship is restored, then give God the glory… if the relationship cannot be restored, despite your best efforts, get on with your life. Let it go.
Do you have an unresolved offense in your life? Perhaps someone has disappointed you, abused you, betrayed a confidence, or broke a promise, and you have legitimate reason for being wounded. But forgiveness begins when we experience the forgiveness of our own sins through the cross of Christ and the transforming Grace of God. When we have an accurate understanding of our own shortcomings before a Holy God, it empowers us to choose radical forgiveness too. In Luke 7:47, Jesus said of a prostitute who anointed His feet with expensive perfume, “Therefore I say to you, her sins, which are many, are forgiven, for she loved much. But to whom little is forgiven, the same loves little.” When we fully comprehend the radical forgiveness that God has extended to us while we were yet sinners, our hearts will be changed. It is much easier to forgive others when we understand how much God has forgiven us.
AMEN
The message that God forgives has a prior condition: that we forgive those who have injured us. "If you do not forgive men their trespasses," Jesus says, "neither will your Father in heaven forgive your trespasses." But forgiveness is not an emotion; Forgiveness is an act of the will, and the will can function regardless of the temperature of the heart. Jesus can help us and it is also the power of the Holy Spirit that helps. We’ve all been wronged in some way or other… we have all been mistreated, victimized, offended... but we cannot live the abundant life that the Lord wants us to live when our days are steeped in unforgiveness – when we hold grudges… when we fail to forgive the ones who have caused us pain.
No one understood the cost of broken relationships better than Jesus. In fact, in one of His final prayers, as He hung dying on the cross, Jesus offered words of reconciliation to the very people who had unjustly accused and convicted Him – the people who were killing Him. “Father, forgive them for they know not what they do.” Right in the midst of being wronged, Jesus forgave those who wronged Him. Now understand, these executioners were not model citizens who just happened to draw the short straw on crucifixion day. These were Roman soldiers that were so filled with violence and rage that the only role fit for them in the Roman Army was cold hearted executioners. They had already beaten Jesus, and sledgehammered spikes into His hands and feet. They played marbles for the garment that they stripped from His back. They spat upon Him and ridiculed Him and mocked Him.
But in the midst of it all… our wounded and exposed Savior forgave… “Father, forgive them for they know not what they do.” What a powerful statement for Jesus to make. And what a powerful and difficult example for us to follow. Mark’s gospel records that “when the centurion, who stood there in front of Jesus, saw how He died, he said, “Surely this man was the Son of God!” Years later the apostle Paul would write in his letter to the church in Rome, “You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous person, though for a good person someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” The prayer that Jesus prayed as He hung on the cross – a prayer for the very men who put Him there – left its mark on the foundation of the Christian faith. While we were still sinners, in the midst of our wrongdoing, Jesus forgave us.
Unfortunately, many of us believe we can go about our lives unaffected by conflicts in our relationships with people we care about. This can be a big bucket drainer. Sometimes we don’t even remember what we are mad about; like on the Andy Griffith show - the feud between the Carters and the Wakefields. Are you holding onto a grudge that you don’t even remember? Of course sometimes, we do understand why, but it can be petty. Wife mad at husband – not enough chips...Mad as a hornet over some Doritos! We should consider if we are being too sensitive. Some other issues causing it? Many such concerns are legitimate like being mistreated, victimized or offended.
*** Jesus Offers Five “Go” Instructions
1 ) **Go - In Matthew 18:15, Jesus outlines what to do in situations where you’ve been wronged…“Moreover if your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he hears you, you have gained your brother.” If there is a rift in a relationship, no matter who caused it, YOU go. YOU take the first step. Whether it’s your problem, or the other persons problem, or somewhere in between; as a child of God, it is your responsibility to initiate an attempt at reconciliation. Don’t sit by the phone waiting for the wrongdoer to call you. If there is friction in your relationship, GO.
2 ) **Go alone – (between you and him alone) Matthew 18:15
Don’t call all your friends together and say, “Do you know what Fred did to me?” “I’m gonna go talk to him in a day or two, but first, I have to tell you all the things he did and said…” What we are really trying to do is get everyone on our side first. It’s human nature to try to garner support from everyone else before you go talk to the one who has wronged you… but Jesus said “Go in private.”
3 ) **Go to reconcile the relationship - Rabbi David A. Nelson likes to tell the story of two brothers who went to their rabbi to settle a longstanding feud. The rabbi got the two to reconcile their differences and shake hands. As they were about to leave, he asked each one to make a wish for the other in honor of the Jewish New Year. The first brother turned to the other and said, "I wish you what you wish me." At that, the second brother threw up his hands and said, "See, Rabbi, he's starting up again!" Have you ever had someone come to you to discuss an issue, and you can tell that all that person really wants is to give you a piece of his mind? There is no desire on his end for reconciliation, in fact, he’s mad! Accusations are flying and he’s just making you feel worse – putting you on the defense. Matthew 18:15 (If he hears you, says Jesus, you have gained your brother) Go for the purpose of gaining your brother. Go with an attitude of reconciliation.
4) **Go now – So we know from Matthew 18:15 that when there is division in a relationship that we are to GO; we aren’t going to tell anyone else, we are going to GO ALONE; and we understand that our hearts must be prepared to GO with a spirit of reconciliation. But how long should you wait before you try to set things right? One day? Ten days? 30 days? Is there a sense of urgency to reconcile a broken relationship? Jesus addresses the “when” question in Matthew 5;23-24: “Therefore if you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift.” If you’re in a worship service…song reminds you of a broken relationship, go (better to be reconciled than to continue singing to God) If you’re reading your bible… verse reminds you of an unresolved issue (chapter will be there when you get back) Go now!
5) **Let it Go – Sometimes you can do everything right. You go, go alone, go in a spirit of reconciliation, and go right now. But the other person says, “No. I’m going to hang onto my anger. I want to hold onto this grudge, and you’re messing it up by coming to me to reconcile. I don’t want to fix anything. So NOW what do we do? Romans 12:17-18 says: Repay no one evil for evil. Have regard for good things in the sight of all men. If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men. You can’t control other people’s responses. If the other party chooses to hold on to the anger and bitterness, after you’ve done everything you can to make amends, then you have to let it go. If the relationship is restored, then give God the glory… if the relationship cannot be restored, despite your best efforts, get on with your life. Let it go.
Do you have an unresolved offense in your life? Perhaps someone has disappointed you, abused you, betrayed a confidence, or broke a promise, and you have legitimate reason for being wounded. But forgiveness begins when we experience the forgiveness of our own sins through the cross of Christ and the transforming Grace of God. When we have an accurate understanding of our own shortcomings before a Holy God, it empowers us to choose radical forgiveness too. In Luke 7:47, Jesus said of a prostitute who anointed His feet with expensive perfume, “Therefore I say to you, her sins, which are many, are forgiven, for she loved much. But to whom little is forgiven, the same loves little.” When we fully comprehend the radical forgiveness that God has extended to us while we were yet sinners, our hearts will be changed. It is much easier to forgive others when we understand how much God has forgiven us.
AMEN