The power of prayer

[Wrg1405]

The power of prayer.

I just want to ask about the power of prayer for ourselves. In a sense it is a selfish question.

I'm not really a fan of myself. I go to dark places, by that I mean I find it difficult to come before God and just hate myself for being myself and my shortcomings.

I can find it very difficult to spend time with God. Just me and him. As I said I'm not really a fan of myself, I know my failings, I know what I struggle with and what I can't seem to overcome.

Yet when I pluck up the courage to come before God and just talk to him, like he's sat next to me I feel secure, accepted and reassured.

Yet I can still find myself going back to that dark place.

Why?

Does anyone else experience the same?

 

[Eugene]

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Dear Brother Wrg1405, I reckon I have really never thought of it in those terms, but find myself in the thinking of why would God have such grace on me: me knowing me as it were.

Some have noticed I don’t ask for personal prayer, and that’s because I have found my Father so very faithful to His word below. I reckon if my faith failed me I too would seek intercessory prayer from others.
Heb 4:16 Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need.

Now I think of what may hinder my access: nothing but me. We have been forgiven but my biggest judge is me and that is the reason for obedience Rom 13:5 Wherefore ye must needs be subject, not only for wrath, but also for conscience sake. If we do fail we can clear our conscience in a heartbeat. 1 Jn 1:9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

Blessings in Christ Jesus. :2

 

[daninthelionsden]

The power of prayer.

I just want to ask about the power of prayer for ourselves. In a sense it is a selfish question.

I'm not really a fan of myself. I go to dark places, by that I mean I find it difficult to come before God and just hate myself for being myself and my shortcomings.

I can find it very difficult to spend time with God. Just me and him. As I said I'm not really a fan of myself, I know my failings, I know what I struggle with and what I can't seem to overcome.

Yet when I pluck up the courage to come before God and just talk to him, like he's sat next to me I feel secure, accepted and reassured.

Yet I can still find myself going back to that dark place.

Why?

Does anyone else experience the same?

I deal with self loathing all the time. With all the physical/emotional/spiritual damage I incurred, I find it difficult to approach the Lord on my own behalf. I find it much, much easier to approach the Lord on the behalf of others. Abuse victims deal with much imposed guilt/shame. Perpetrators and those who support them rely on that to keep the victim invalidated/silenced/internalized. A very effective weapon at times. But when its all said and done. I have no real or effective choice other than to turn to my Savior/Deliverer. Who else is there really? It reminds me of the C.S. Lewis short story of the little girl needing to drink from the waters and the Lion over watching those same waters. The little girl has no real choice ...nor do I.

 

[Not_Now.Soon]

When I was younger and more worried about emy short comings, I often had prayed a prayer that included that God not leave me and abondon me. I've felt the same way many times when I prayed that, that God held me in His comfort, probabley simular to how you've felt reassured and accepted. Now a days I hear myself ask for God to help me be a better man, or sometimes to help me be the man He wants me to be.

I don't think it's uncommon to be a Christian and worry about your short comings before coming to God. In these times it's helped me to remember that Jesus said to pray for all things (or in all occasions), and that thought helped me chase away the thought of being undeserving or unwanted by God and stifle the prayer. It's also helped me to ask God for His help and His strength against temptations that held my most concerned short comings.

I hope any of this can help. Remember the strength and love you've felt in God's response to praying. If you can, be strengthened by this and by the bible encouraging prayer. God knows your needs too, so if you want to pray to God by saying "Dear God," and then be silent for a bit, I'm sure He'll sit by you like He does and be with you.