[__ Prayer __] weakling, "humbling experiences"

[Christ_empowered]

OK. So, it just dawned on me: until recently--I mean, very recently--I was a weakling. Prematurely aged since high school, sickly, not smart enough nor considered "good enough" for a lot of things, I was a weakling. I was also a fool and an unrepentant wretch.
So, a little less than 2 years ago, I finally *got it*--God's doing, not mine--and came to repentance. Its only now, 1 month into my 3-0 and nearly 2 years into my Christianity, that I'm really starting to see myself who I was, am, and am becoming in Christ.
It is written that He chooses the foolish things of this world to confound the wise. He chooses the weak to shame the strong. That's me, in both categories.
But..no longer. No, I don't have a job. I went mad for years, so I'm on disability. Part of it was personal sin, a lot of it was simply being a weakling in strong, wise, affluent places. I was punished mightily for my very existence.
I very much want a degree, because I don't want to live around here much longer. School starts Monday! This is a whole new world, not being a total and complete "weakling." I'm blessed, of course, but its humbling, too. That's the other thing. Back in the day, I was diagnosed as "severely narcissistic" (NPD), and the docs set out to put me through "Humbling experiences." I know, doesn't sound terrible, but...my "humbling experiences" involved releasing my info., making up rumors, getting people at one of the few jobs I had to "give me a hard time," and generally making my life impossible. I was poor, sickly, stupid, and weak and all I got from the world--and psychiatry represents the world's morals in pure, distilled form--was pain, suffering, victimization, and oppression.
Anyway..."humbling experiences." The secular people just put me through Hell. God gave me a taste of Heaven, and its truly humbling. I mean, without Him, I'm Less Than 0, more so than other people. Smart? OK, yeah...wasn't before. Healthy? Yup yup....I was sickly and weak before. Increasingly of sound mind? Absolutely! But I was state mental hospital material before.
So..yeah...its not yet 5 AM here. Just thought I'd offer up a little praise.

File this one under "Praise Report."

 

[Eugene]

It is written that He chooses the foolish things of this world to confound the wise. He chooses the weak to shame the strong. That's me, in both categories.
I don't have a job. I went mad for years, so I'm on disability. Part of it was personal sin, a lot of it was simply being a weakling in strong, wise, affluent places. I was punished mightily for my very existence.

Dear brother, your praise report is acceptable unto God as He is glorified in it. Your trials bring to my mind the sufferings of Nebuchadnezzar in Dan 4:33. . . he was driven from men, and did eat grass as oxen, and his body was wet with the dew of heaven, till his hairs were grown like eagles' feathers, and his nails like birds' claws. Dan 4:34 And at the end of the days I Nebuchadnezzar lifted up mine eyes unto heaven, and mine understanding returned unto me, and I blessed the most High, and I praised and honoured him that liveth for ever, whose dominion is an everlasting dominion, and his kingdom is from generation to generation.