what do do? some advice please..

[Agarash]

Hi everyone.I normally hang around in the "other religions" section, but i have something i wish to mention here, and hopefully get some advice:

Theres this girl (arent there always ) and I am pretty clueless as to how approach the matter of how to tell her how i feel about her. the situation is this.. our group of friends are very close, we hang out alot and when one has plans the other normally tags along, we get to see alot of each other, which is great, it makes us close, and seeing as all of us are in the same church, it makes the fellowship we have together really special to me. now... about this girl, she entered our friendship group about 3 months ago, she really fitted in perfectly with us, she is absolutely great, shes a great christian, and i really feel this attraction towards her. both emotionally and physically.... the question... what to do??

Do i tell her straight forward how i feel? we rarely are together alone because of our friendship group.. so what must i do? take here out alone and tell her? I am by no means a ladies man, so i find it VERY difficult to tell how she feels about me... I have no idea, does she even thin of me in "that" way? this is the burning question in my mind.

thanks for reading.

 

[Lekazar]

"But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to
sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell.
And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell." (Matthew 5:28-30)


"For some are eunuchs because they were born that way; others were made that way by men; and others have renounced marriage
because of the kingdom of heaven. The one who can accept this should accept it." (Matthew 19:12)

 

[Agarash]

what?????

 

[Rob]

I think he is trying to warn you not to lust for this woman, even in your mind as that is a sin. I could be wrong though.

I personally think you shouldn't lust after her but there is nothing wrong with finding her attractive either. Finding beauty in one of God's creatures doesn't necessarly involve lust.

If you really feel that way about her then just tell her how you feel. It's hard to do but the truth is always the way to go! I'm a happily married man because I was honest with my wife when I first met her and I'm still honest with her to this day. She may or may not feel the same way about you but you will never know if you don't let her know how you feel. I would reccomend talking to her away from the group as to not make her feel pressured though.

You never know, this could be the woman God has picked out for you to spend the rest of your days on Earth with and then again she may not. Until you take the chance to find out you will always wonder. You have the courage in you to talk to her, you just have to remember that Jesus is with you always.

 

[Agarash]

an update, i told her how i feel about her, and she doesnt feel the same... it was ...sad. I cant help but feel resent towards God for not seeing that this would have made me happy..doesnt he want me to be happy...

but then at the same time i kow that God knows what is good for me, so maybe theres something even BETTER for me that i though this relationship would have been. but its tough....

i managed to salvage our friendship, its slowly getting back to the way it used to be, which makes all this ALOT easier.

 

[KnarfKS]

I have seen where a relationship was made to work because the 2 thought it was going to make them happy, but in the end it was brutal.

Just remember a fun happy relationship can end quickly, but a horrible relationship that was not God willed will linger, that is where the emotional baggage that follows people around can start.

Hey man, at least look on the bright side, you tried. You would have been kicking yourself if you didn't. But look at it now, the worst is over and things are getting back to normal. Things work out. Romans 8...
A new even smarter, hotter and more Godly woman may come your way. :-D

This happened to me, but the other thing was she eventually married one of my good friends. In the end I was extremely glad I never dated her I got to know her more and it would have bombed and I'm extremely glad they got together because they are great with one another.