I can't believe I'm going to post this
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First of all, I want to thank everyone that has posted in this topic. Thank you.
What has prompted me to post today, came from a statement to another member that almost blind sided me within the manner and context it was used.
...You are absolutely right. God bless your father for raising you in a sound Christian home.
Stovebolts said:
Faith to me has many dimensions but what I've grown to understand, is it's an utter trust in God. (Hebrews 11).
Faith for me is when under all odds, we put our lives and the lives around us in the hands of God. I don’t' believe this is a passive faith, I believe it is active.
I want to unpack my statement as the road less traveled, if I can borrow the term Vic.
I realize that I’m not perfect. Nothing about me is perfect, not even my walk with Christ. I have so many questions in my head and sometimes life just doesn’t make sense. At times, I yearn to leave the pain that this world has to offer and be with my heavenly father who has promised to wipe away every tear from my eye.
Moses said, God, who shall I say sent me? God’s reply was, I AM. God is who we need him to be when we need him to be. God is never late, he’s always right on time.
Poor Abraham, he was old and grey when God fulfilled his promise. I wonder what went through his mind. I’m sure it was a test of endurance as each passing year went by. And what does God do when Isaac is born? He tells Abraham to take him up to the mountain. Yes, God is I AM because he has always been and always will be. But Abraham endured. Abraham obeyed because Abraham knew that God was, is and always will be.
Faith for me is when your world gets rocked so hard, that you have nowhere else to turn because in the midst of the darkness that surrounds you, a glimmer of light shines off in the distance. For those that were raised in good, solid Christian homes, be thankful that the Lord has not tested your faith to the degree that others faith has been tested. God has a plan for you, just as he has a plan for the orphan, the widow and the oppressed.
I don’t believe in once saved always saved. For those that do, I’d say that your faith has never been rocked hard enough for you to actually come to the realization you could raise your fist to God and turn your back on him. Every man has his breaking point. Not every man has been tested to his breaking point, nor is there cause to and I would not wish that upon my worst enemy.
I did not choose the way I was raised. I did not say to God, “God, do not place me in a good solid Christian homeâ€Â. Furthermore, I did not say to God. “God, Take my first born childâ€Â. You see, God knew the faith that I placed in my first born child. God knew the emphasis and importance that I placed on marriage and family. God knew that I despised divorce and I knew that God hated divorce. I swore an oath at an early age that I would never divorce and my children would never go to be without the words, I love you spoken to them. I was in my late 20’s when I started to force my Dad to tell me those three little words, how then, does one come to grips that his wife played a horrific role in the death of our beloved child?
One comes to grip with this and so much more by saying, God, YOU ARE my God. In fear and trembling, I honor your name for in all the darkness, you are my light.
You see, I have three other daughters. My middle daughter I have not seen since she was three. Her poor innocent world was shattered as the state ripped her from her sister and our dysfunctional family was further dispersed. She is currently in foster care and I’ve been told that she is so doped up on psych drugs that she will never be able to take care of herself. My oldest daughter just turned 17 this month and has been bounced in the foster care system more than I was. We e-mail back and forth on rare occasion when she feels like it, though it’s been awhile. My youngest Mariah, she is a doll and lives with my cousin and is being raised in the Roman Catholic Church. God bless her little heart, I know that God has plans for her. She misses her Sisters so much.
What do you have left when everything around you that you treasured has been ripped away? You have choice. Resentment and anger; or faith. Does one give up, or does he endure? Paul says, I will boast in my weakness… I often ponder the depth of that statement for in that weakness, he speaks of a reality we call strength. That strength, I believe, is faith that is refined through endurance.
Abraham was willing to do what God told him to do. He obeyed, but he never lost focus on what was ahead of him, even when he couldn’t see it because he knew that God is the great I AM, that was everything that Abraham needed Him to be, when he needed him to be it.
“Faith for me is when under all odds, we put our lives and the lives around us in the hands of Godâ€Â
When I was younger, I broke up with this guy that I was living with. I remember taking his 357 and placing it up to my head as tears rolled down my face. As I was about to pull the trigger, a voice said, “wait, there is somehing you must see.†And so I continue to wait.
No doubt, some would consider me a nut job. I make no excuses.
May God bless all of you.