Ed, the following two Scriptures will be a help to you as you seek to work out some of the other help offered you by the other brothers here on this thread. These two Scriptures, while being the underlying truth of the Scriptures, are a sample of the historical and spiritual truth revealed through the same words in testimony of the Lord, our God. As you ask God to give you bread in his will and service, he will not give you a serpent. Read and listen. Faith comes by hearing. Watch and see the arm of the Lord. Then you will be given a heart to understand. First the blood, then the water, afterward the spirit of understanding.
Ps 40:6-8
6 Sacrifice and offering thou didst not desire; mine ears hast thou opened: burnt offering and sin offering hast thou not required.
7 Then said I, Lo, I come: in the volume of the book it is written of me,
8 I delight to do thy will, O my God: yea, thy law is within my heart. KJV
Heb 10:5-10
5 Wherefore when he cometh into the world, he saith, Sacrifice and offering thou wouldest not, but a body hast thou prepared me:
6 In burnt offerings and sacrifices for sin thou hast had no pleasure.
7 Then said I, Lo, I come (in the volume of the book it is written of me,) to do thy will, O God.
8 Above when he said, Sacrifice and offering and burnt offerings and offering for sin thou wouldest not, neither hadst pleasure therein; which are offered by the law;
9 Then said he, Lo, I come to do thy will, O God. He taketh away the first, that he may establish the second.
10 By the which will we are sanctified through the offering of the body of Jesus Christ once for all. KJV
Heb 10:11-14
11 And every priest standeth daily ministering and offering oftentimes the same sacrifices, which can never take away sins:
12 But this man, after he had offered one sacrifice for sins for ever, sat down on the right hand of God;
13 From henceforth expecting till his enemies be made his footstool.
14 For by one offering he hath perfected for ever them that are sanctified.KJV
Joe