Herkamer63
Member
Okay, to get the full scope of this, let me put some context into this, and keep in mind, I’m a 33 year old single man who never had a serious relationship with a woman despite my best efforts:
A few years ago, I weighed in about 330 lbs. Since about 2012-13, I’ve been fighting to get my weight down, but it was just an up and down battle. Recently, in the past 6 1/2 months, I made a switch on my diet and workout, and now I can say I’m nearly down to 210 lbs. Much of my problem had been my weight and my confidence in these situations. Now that I’m much thinner and more active than ever before, there have been women checking me out and are trying to hook me up (not in THAT way) with some people. One person, however, has caught my attention.
This woman is a partial owner and operator of one of the nicest restaurants where I live. I’ve known her for about 2 years (this year being the 2nd), but nothing ever came about between us mainly because I didn’t try and lacked the confidence (still do you a degree). She’s a good looking woman, a year or 2 younger, and was a body builder at one point. Everyone that knows her (including my own mother because she’s friends with her family), and based on my interactions, she’s a good person and a very hard worker, and they all think highly of her. Recently, if I read the signals right, she had shown a level of interest in me and had wanted me to come into the her restaurant to check out the new renovations.
However, I heard she was seeing someone and just the other night, I saw the guy she was seeing. Based on what I’ve heard, this guy isn’t a boyfriend per se. Just someone that she’s kind of dating. She didn’t seem thrilled at all with him, and the guy seemed almost emotionless. She tried to interact with him, but nothing.
When I saw and greeted her, she lit up. Smile on her face, very talkative, and seemed happy altogether. I saw her and this guy over at the place she worked and she, by her self (no guy present during this time), reconstructed the interior by hand. I complemented her on it and had a little chat about some random stuff, while the guy just sat there, even though I was trying to talk to him as well. Afterwards, I sat back at my table, and, again, it didn’t even look remotely joyful. Even when they left there was nothing.
I caught up with one of the people who knows her well, and she has always had bad luck with the guys she would date. They charm her just enough to get her to go out with them, but that’s the furthest it would go. This person says she’s great but not the guys she dated. I told this person that I’m interested in her and half tempted to ask her out, but I’m holding off, for now, until I know what’s going on exactly because it looks like this relationship between and this guy will end soon.
I prayed about this because I’ve been burned in the past with women, and I prayed the day before this happened to see if there was going to be a sign. I just don’t know how to interpret this: if it was a sign, not a sign, but if it was a sign, did God want to tell me she’s taken and this is the guy she will be with or did He wanted to show me how unhappy her date nights with these type of guys are and how I can step in and show her a good time (maybe build a relationship)?
Now, I understand she’s not the only fish in the lake (believe me when I say that there are women I know that I wouldn’t mind asking either because they too have shown interest), but this one in particular is different and isn’t the loose type (if you know what I mean). I’d like for some advise if I should just move on or make something happen. I’ll continue to pray because I don’t want to dwell on it. I’m down a lot of weight, I feel healthy, active, and happier, and I’m ready to put myself out into the dating world again.
A few years ago, I weighed in about 330 lbs. Since about 2012-13, I’ve been fighting to get my weight down, but it was just an up and down battle. Recently, in the past 6 1/2 months, I made a switch on my diet and workout, and now I can say I’m nearly down to 210 lbs. Much of my problem had been my weight and my confidence in these situations. Now that I’m much thinner and more active than ever before, there have been women checking me out and are trying to hook me up (not in THAT way) with some people. One person, however, has caught my attention.
This woman is a partial owner and operator of one of the nicest restaurants where I live. I’ve known her for about 2 years (this year being the 2nd), but nothing ever came about between us mainly because I didn’t try and lacked the confidence (still do you a degree). She’s a good looking woman, a year or 2 younger, and was a body builder at one point. Everyone that knows her (including my own mother because she’s friends with her family), and based on my interactions, she’s a good person and a very hard worker, and they all think highly of her. Recently, if I read the signals right, she had shown a level of interest in me and had wanted me to come into the her restaurant to check out the new renovations.
However, I heard she was seeing someone and just the other night, I saw the guy she was seeing. Based on what I’ve heard, this guy isn’t a boyfriend per se. Just someone that she’s kind of dating. She didn’t seem thrilled at all with him, and the guy seemed almost emotionless. She tried to interact with him, but nothing.
When I saw and greeted her, she lit up. Smile on her face, very talkative, and seemed happy altogether. I saw her and this guy over at the place she worked and she, by her self (no guy present during this time), reconstructed the interior by hand. I complemented her on it and had a little chat about some random stuff, while the guy just sat there, even though I was trying to talk to him as well. Afterwards, I sat back at my table, and, again, it didn’t even look remotely joyful. Even when they left there was nothing.
I caught up with one of the people who knows her well, and she has always had bad luck with the guys she would date. They charm her just enough to get her to go out with them, but that’s the furthest it would go. This person says she’s great but not the guys she dated. I told this person that I’m interested in her and half tempted to ask her out, but I’m holding off, for now, until I know what’s going on exactly because it looks like this relationship between and this guy will end soon.
I prayed about this because I’ve been burned in the past with women, and I prayed the day before this happened to see if there was going to be a sign. I just don’t know how to interpret this: if it was a sign, not a sign, but if it was a sign, did God want to tell me she’s taken and this is the guy she will be with or did He wanted to show me how unhappy her date nights with these type of guys are and how I can step in and show her a good time (maybe build a relationship)?
Now, I understand she’s not the only fish in the lake (believe me when I say that there are women I know that I wouldn’t mind asking either because they too have shown interest), but this one in particular is different and isn’t the loose type (if you know what I mean). I’d like for some advise if I should just move on or make something happen. I’ll continue to pray because I don’t want to dwell on it. I’m down a lot of weight, I feel healthy, active, and happier, and I’m ready to put myself out into the dating world again.