Hello,
After 4 years of courtship and almost 10 years of marriage and 2 children, I found out that my husband cheated with a 19 year old collage student, first flirting through chat and later meeting up in car and hotels for sex for 4 years. I cracked his cellphone password and found deleted videos of them having sex.
He said they met not regularly but he can't count how often they did it. The girl first thought he was single because there was no evidence on Facebook that he was married. When she found out he that he is married she got angry but both continued.
When I confronted him, he asked for forgiveness and was immediately willing to cancel the relationship and deleted all her information. He agreed to my conditions to block several people on Facebook and he took time for me in my grieving moments. He also is willing to invest in our relationship. BUT he won't give information about the girl, I wanted to read their conversation but he deleted it all, he didn't even give me her name.
I wanted to know the reason why he cheated. I know that I was very busy in homeschooling, ministry and my studies. But he assured me that it was all his fault. He also distanced himself from God and the church. Actually I sensed that there is something but I was afraid what to find, because he changed his password.
He said he cheated just for the sex, but I was able to contact the girl and she was really in love with him. So I wonder if he also develped feelings, but he won't tell me about what happened in detail, because he said he wanito protect me, so that I not always think about it over and over again.
I decided to forgive and stay with him. But I am sooo afraid that it might happen again or he is lying again, because I can't really see that he is suffering from what he did and he is not making moves towards God. But is password is known to me amd also to his Facebook.
Any advice? No one else knows in our family or church or friends... it's like I have no one else to talk with. Thank you!
After 4 years of courtship and almost 10 years of marriage and 2 children, I found out that my husband cheated with a 19 year old collage student, first flirting through chat and later meeting up in car and hotels for sex for 4 years. I cracked his cellphone password and found deleted videos of them having sex.
He said they met not regularly but he can't count how often they did it. The girl first thought he was single because there was no evidence on Facebook that he was married. When she found out he that he is married she got angry but both continued.
When I confronted him, he asked for forgiveness and was immediately willing to cancel the relationship and deleted all her information. He agreed to my conditions to block several people on Facebook and he took time for me in my grieving moments. He also is willing to invest in our relationship. BUT he won't give information about the girl, I wanted to read their conversation but he deleted it all, he didn't even give me her name.
I wanted to know the reason why he cheated. I know that I was very busy in homeschooling, ministry and my studies. But he assured me that it was all his fault. He also distanced himself from God and the church. Actually I sensed that there is something but I was afraid what to find, because he changed his password.
He said he cheated just for the sex, but I was able to contact the girl and she was really in love with him. So I wonder if he also develped feelings, but he won't tell me about what happened in detail, because he said he wanito protect me, so that I not always think about it over and over again.
I decided to forgive and stay with him. But I am sooo afraid that it might happen again or he is lying again, because I can't really see that he is suffering from what he did and he is not making moves towards God. But is password is known to me amd also to his Facebook.
Any advice? No one else knows in our family or church or friends... it's like I have no one else to talk with. Thank you!
